Heartfulness Magazine - June 2022 (Volume 7, Issue 6)

Page 1

June

N

ST

U RTF

THE W

E

H

EA L

2022

NESS I

Transform Your Life DAAJI The Journey of a Lifetime HEATHER MASON The Universal Language THOM BOND

Divine Miss Earth TEJASWINI MANOGNA

www.heartfulnessmagazine.com


Heartful Adizes Leadership Celebrating 12 Voyages together! What people are saying...

It was a great learning experience. If one says, “What they don’t teach you at Harvard”, the learning in this course justifies it one hundred percent!

The concept of the course itself in getting the voyagers to analyze and improve their thinking in the decision making basis the Adizes Techniques with a touch of Heartfulness, with no influence from skippers but with the guided push in the right direction was the WOW for me.

Students edifying each other is a truly powerful idea. Teachers almost need to be careful not to interfere. It opens up a universe of learning.

Prabodh Darvekar

Adin Jubell

Greg Dekker

Heartful Adizes Leaders continually refine vital skills and equip themselves and others with practical tools to successfully deal with complex challenges.

Always... U-priced!

These courses are offered as a gift, trusting the generosity of participants to support the development and sustenance of similar in-depth learning journeys.

Our next voyage departs

AUTUMN 2022

STAY TUNED HERE!

mastering-change.org



CREATIVE TEAM Editorial Team — Elizabeth Denley, Mamata Venkat, Vanessa Patel, Kashish Kalwani, Christine Prisland, Animesh Anand

SUBSCRIBE TO

Heartfulness Magazine

Design & Art — Uma Maheswari, Christian Macketanz, Jasmee Mudgal, Arati Shedde, Ramya Sriram Photography — Heartfulness Media Team, Rajesh Menon Writers — Ichak Adizes, Daaji, Christian Macketanz, Thomas Mogensen Interviewees — Thom Bond, Melissa Bernstein, Tejaswini Manogna, Heather Mason, Veronique Nicolai, Saraswathi Vasudevan Support Team — Balaji Iyer, Shreyas Khanjee, Liaa Kumar, Karthik Natarajan, Ashraf Nobi, Jayakumar Parthasarathy, Arjun Reddy, Jatish Seth, Shankar Vasudevan

ISSN 2455-7684 CONTRIBUTIONS contributions@heartfulnessmagazine.com

ADVERTISING advertising@heartfulnessmagazine.com

SUBSCRIPTIONS

Available in print and digital versions Order copies online: single, 12-month subscription and 24-month subscription:

subscriptions@ heartfulnessmagazine.com Printed copies are also available at selected stores, airports and newsstands, and at Heartfulness centers and ashrams. heartfulnessmagazine.com/subscribe

H eart f u l n es s

subscriptions@heartfulnessmagazine.com www.heartfulnessmagazine.com/subscriptions

EDITOR — Neeraj Kumar PRINTED BY — Sunil Kumar RK PRINT HOUSE, H.No.11-6-759, 3rd Floor, Anand Complex, Lakdikapul, Hyderabad, Telangana, 500004, India.

PUBLISHER — Sunil Kumar representing

Heartfulness Education Trust 13-110, Kanha Shanti Vanam, Kanha Village, Nandigama Mandal, Ranga Reddy District, Telangana, 509325, India. Copyright © 2022 Heartfulness Education Trust. All rights reserved.


The Beauty of

YOGA Dear readers, During the uncertainty of the last two years, many of us turned toward activities of self-care that helped us feel grounded. Yoga and meditation became overwhelmingly popular, and as we explore these practices more deeply, there is a growing collective call to understand their benefits. On March 14, we started the 100 days of Yoga4Unity 2022 initiative, leading up to International Yoga Day on June 21. For these 100 days, a number of renowned yoga institutions have been offering comprehensive courses to different audiences – seniors, children, beginners, and yoga adepts and teachers. In tune with this flourishing movement, we take a closer look at yoga, hearing from long-time practitioners around the globe who have found peace, healing, and growth in their individual practices. In particular, Heartfulness has been active in the West for over 50 years, and we hear from some of the early pioneers who have been yoga ambassadors in the West since the late 60s and early 70s. To learn about the Yoga4Unity initiative, and watch the sessions on video, please visit https://www.youtube.com/yoga4unity. Happy reading! The editors

Ju n e 2 02 2

5


6

H eart f u l n es s


inside self-care

workplace

environment

The Journey of a Lifetime

Kindred Spirits

Divine Miss Earth

Interview with Heather Mason

Interview with Melissa Bernstein

Interview with Tejaswini Manogna

Yoga for Self-development

The Benefits of Doing Nothing

12

Interview with Dr. Veronique Nicolai

19

inspiration Four Attitudes That Will Transform Your Life Daaji

26

50 Years of Breathing Thomas Mogensen

32

36

68

Dr. Ichak Adizes

creativity

42

Do What You Love Ramya Sriram

45

Patience and Observation An art essay by Christian Macketanz

74

relationships what's up The Universal Language of Life

80

Interview with Thom Bond

48

For Caretakers Interview with Saraswathi Vasudevan

58

Ju n e 2 02 2

7


DAAJI

THOM BOND

HEATHER MASON

Daaji is the Heartfulness Guide. He is an innovator and researcher, equally at home in the fields of spirituality, science, and the evolution of consciousness. He has taken our understanding of human potential to a new level.

Thom is a founder and Director of Education for The New York Center for Nonviolent Communication. He is the author of The Compassion Book, founder of The Compassion Project, and the author of Shifting Toward Compassion and 64 Days for Peace.

Heather is the founder of the Minded Institute, a professional yoga therapy training organization, and the Director of the Yoga and Healthcare Alliance. She specializes in the treatment of trauma and anxiety, and the use of physiological assessment in yoga therapy.

VÉRONIQUE NICOLAI

MELISSA BERNSTEIN

ICHAK ADIZES

Véronique is a French pediatrician, meditation trainer, and Yoga instructor. She was a coordinator of the International Heartfulness Training Programs and a co-founder of the Heartfulness program for cancer patients. She is currently the Director of the Heartfulness Yoga Academy.

Melissa is a well-known entrepreneur and author based in the US, popularly known as co-founder of the toy company, Melissa& Doug. Melissa is also the author of LifeLines, an inspirational journey from darkness to light, a story she hopes will help others find a path to meaning and inner peace.

Dr. Adizes is a leading management expert. He has received 21 honorary doctorates and is the author of 27 books that have been translated into 36 languages. He is recognized as one of the top thirty thought leaders of America.

8

H eart f u l n es s


contributors

THOMAS MOGENSEN

SARASWATI VASUDEVAN

TEJASWINI MANOGNA

Thomas was one of the first Europeans to travel to India to visit Babuji, and wrote two books about his experiences, In the light of His light and Dreams Awakening. He filmed conversations with Babuji that were published in Babuji in Shahjahanpur, and continues to write and translate the literature of the Heartfulness Masters into Danish.

Saraswathi is a Yoga teacher, trainer and therapist in the tradition of Sri T. Krishnamacharya. In 2010, she and her husband founded YogaVahini. Saraswathi currently serves on the Board of Directors of Yoga Alliance, the largest international Yoga certifying and credentialing body.

Tejaswini is a doctor, a model, and the winner of Miss Earth India 2019. She was also an awarded member of the National Cadet Corps of India, and is trained in Bharatanatyam Classical Dance.

EMILIE MOGENSEN Emilie has design and spirituality in her DNA, and as a designer she is on a mission to enhance unity, compassion, and heartcentered entrepreneurship in modern business endeavors.

CHRISTIAN MACKETANZ Christian is Professor of Painting at the Academy of Fine Arts, Dresden, Germany. He studied painting with Maria Lassnig in Vienna, and lived in Rome and Berlin before taking up his current post in Dresden. He is a Heartfulness trainer.

Ju n e 2 02 2

RAMYA SRIRAM Ramya is a content and communication specialist, cartoonist, and travel writer who likes to find meaning in the little things that make life wonderful. She creates visual stories for clients and is featured in various magazines and newspapers.

9


Yoga begins with listening. When we listen, we are giving space to what is. RICHARD FREEMAN

Self-Care



The Journey of a

L if et im e HEATHER MASON is a yoga therapist who has pioneered yoga and mindfulness in the healthcare sector, including for the National Health Services in the United Kingdom. Here, she is interviewed by EKTA BOUDERLIQUE of the Heartfulness Yoga Academy in the Yoga 4 Unity 2022 program.

I started practicing yoga in 1996, when I was 19, while studying in India, but it was really in 2000, when I went to Asia and Southeast Asia to work on my mental health, that I developed an appreciation of what yoga could offer. I was a gymnast, so at first I thought yoga was an adult form of gymnastics. It took some time to understand the real value.

First and foremost, the philosophy. For so many people it’s the movement, the idea of doing all these interesting poses, whereas I have always been drawn to the concept of oneness, to the dispelling of the illusion of the mind. From a young age, I have known that the mind can envision things that are not the truth. I wanted a practice that would allow me to cultivate wisdom and let go of confused and false views. Later, I understood that wisdom is also supported through movement, through breath work, through the further cultivation of the yamas and niyamas, the disciplines and observances.

Q: What is the aspect of yoga that has attracted you the most?

So it is really the philosophy. I always had an inkling that there was something more than

Q: Welcome, Heather. Thank you for being with us.

Thank you so much. It’s a delight. Q: How were you introduced to yoga?

12

H eart f u l n es s

mundane reality. I have always questioned the nature of truth. I went to Costa Rica when I was 18, took a malarial medication, and had a really bad reaction to it. It led me to realize that there is not always stability in the mind. It was quite an intense realization for a young person to have; I really thought I was crazy. When I returned to Manhattan, I went to see a psychiatrist. He said to me, “I’m sorry, I know you want a pill to fix what’s happening to you, but some people have special experiences, and I believe you’re one of them. The only thing you need to manage is your anxiety.” Soon after that I was on a bus in New York, and a man sat next to me, handed me two tickets



S EL F-CARE

and said, “You don’t know me, but I would like you to go to Gurumayi’s ashram in New York.” So I went to visit Gurumayi, and she gave me a mala and said, “If you want more answers, Heather, go to India.” I went home and said to my father, “Listen, I know this is a strange request, but I need to go to India. Since you said I could study abroad for a semester, that’s where I want to go.”

14

That’s where I started yoga. Q: What an adventure! I can only imagine what it must have been like for you to discover a country like India, the cliché of an ashram, and yet you have done something very different with it. You often speak of mental health issues, which are not easy for people to talk about.

H eart f u l n es s

Many of us are haunted by these things that affect some part of our lives. How did you deal with your depression? And what were the lessons you gleaned from it?

I worked with yoga and mindfulness practices from the Buddhist tradition in two ways. First, I learned that all mental phenomena are processes. Now that isn’t easy. You have to


S ELF -CARE

were challenging enough to direct my mind to the body, I would find my thoughts settling, simply by experiencing the pulsing sensation of the here and now. When I stayed present with that, tension would release, and I would have the clarity to sit and meditate. I started to see through the illusion of my thought processes, such as, “You’re not lovable, you’re not good enough.” These thoughts were because of things that had happened to me in the past. So the dual approach of asanas and meditation allowed me to work with my depression. I understood that it is actually our own processes that give rise to these painful experiences. That is difficult, because it puts the onus of responsibility back on us, but it also means we can let go of the habit of negative thinking and supplant it with clear vision, seeing, and positive thought.

meditate for long periods for that to be anything more than an intellectual concept. Being psychologically unwell, it was extremely difficult to meditate. Critical thoughts and feelings of self-loathing would overcome me. Thankfully, I was fortunate to have a very dedicated teacher. Second, asanas helped me to be with very clear sensations in my body. When I practiced asanas that

I gleaned that I could help other people, which is probably the most important part of my journey. I went to the depths of being unwell, and I worked really hard to become well, so often I know what it’s like to be there. Q: Suppose somebody is just a beginner yoga practitioner. How long do you think it will take them to feel well, whether it’s depression, anxiety, stress, or any other

Ju n e 2 02 2

difficulties related to the mind?

It’s person specific. We also need to realize that if we have mental health issues we need to see yoga as hygiene, and continue to do it for the rest of our lives. Evidence suggests that months of regular practice, for example, five days a week, thirty minutes a day, yield significant results. Practicing for six months regularly seems to be more effective than practicing once a week for a number of years. Of course, there are people whose mental health challenges are very extreme, and it may take them years. One of the most important things I learned is that I wear the scars of my past. I had depression and PTSD. I don’t expect to always be a perfect, balanced human being. I accept who I am, with some level of dysregulation. That is the arising Heather Mason in this life, and that is part of the healing.

I could help other people, which is probably the most important part of my journey.

15


S EL F-CARE

it allows a gradual sensing into the body. For many people with PTSD, the body has been compromised in some way, and attending to the body causes fear. yoga offers breathing practices that regulate the autonomic nervous system, and a key feature of managing PTSD and trauma is that regulation. Yoga allows for gentleness within the self, so that the body can become a place of safety rather than a place of fear. It’s a potent strategy. When I did the training in 2008 or 2009 there were not that many openings for yoga and PTSD. Now it’s burgeoning. The trauma community has a clear understanding that yoga can help their clients. Q: This is an extremely relevant issue. With war a major reality in Europe, what measures do you think need to be taken? Do we need to do prevention rather than just healing? Q: This is the first time I am hearing somebody speak about yoga inducing self-kindness and selfacceptance, especially with mental illness. Could you tell us more about working with trauma?

I’m a yoga therapist and I run the Minded Institute. Some time

16

back, I was delivering an eightweek yoga therapy course for depression and anxiety when one of my students said to me, “There’s a course in Boston on yoga for trauma. Nobody’s done it in this country, so can you do it?” So I did it, and it was so important. yoga has so much to offer people with PTSD, because

H eart f u l n es s

Well, prevention for sure. Unfortunately, for the people of Ukraine, prevention is not currently accessible, but for everyone, building the resilience of the nervous system is important. I’m a huge proponent of breathing practices. Personally, I have found pranayama, the breathing practices offered by yoga, to be the most


S ELF- CARE

potent aspect. If you elongate the exhalation, you increase the messaging to your heart through your vagus nerve, the nerve that starts at the brainstem and travels to many different places, including the heart. Every time you exhale, the vagus nerve releases acetylcholine to the heart, reducing the heart rate, which is further picked up as a message from the body to the brain, allowing for a stilling of the mind. Practicing that for ten minutes a day has the potential to calm you down and cultivate resiliency. Another thing is coherent breathing – inhaling for the count of six and exhaling for the count of six, so each breath cycle is twelve counts. That means five breaths per minute, which has significant effects on cardiovascular measures, and physical and psychological flexibility. I wish that the world would practice pranayama. No matter what tradition a person comes from, no matter how flexible they are, no matter what philosophical system they espouse, everyone can improve their breathing. We would enhance the capacity of our nervous systems to become robust, protecting us from some of the tragedies that befall us. Breath work could become part of the healing regime offered in different therapies, and it could be done in large groups to support the social aspect, as we do need

social bonds in order to support our well-being. Q: I noticed that through the Minded Institute you have extended your work to the National Health System in the UK. What is the difference you are making? And what do you expect to achieve in the years to come?

No matter what tradition a person comes from, no matter how flexible they are, no matter what philosophical system they espouse, everyone can improve their breathing. Just to clarify, the Minded Institute is a training organization for yoga therapists. Many of my graduates do enter the health system through their own efforts. I’m also the Founding Director of the Yoga in Health Care Alliance, which has created a yoga protocol for health, and that’s what we are doing within the NHS. The

Ju n e 2 02 2

NHS has something called social prescribing, which is based on the understanding that social isolation is a major risk factor in a host of different diseases, due to both poor self-care and to the overall effects on the body. The cardiovascular and neurological systems are impacted by isolation. Cuttingedge research also shows that there are different genetic expressions in those who are isolated. Based on this understanding, the UK innovated a scheme of social prescribing whereby people are referred to activity groups, and yoga is one of the activities. The Yoga for Health program was commissioned by the West London clinical group, created and evaluated by the University of Westminster. Paul Fox, the CEO of the Yoga in Health Care Alliance, and myself have trained hundreds of yoga teachers in the UK and beyond. I see a lattice arising, where every clinic, or every small region of the UK, will have this program available for people who are isolated. We built the program for the early intervention of type 2 diabetes, mild depression, mild anxiety, and people at risk of a cardiovascular event in the next ten years. By addressing these groups in the early stages, we hope to save the NHS a lot of money, and also shift the health trajectories of many people. Many health conditions

17


S EL F-CARE

fall into a social isolation risk for a cardiovascular event, mild mental health issues, and type 2 diabetes. Q: I hope we will see this happening in other European countries. Why just Europe? I know that you have worked a lot in the US, too. How is it different from what you saw in India? Can yoga be seen as something more than just physical exercises in the West?

The idea that yoga is perceived first and foremost as exercise in the West is misconstrued. The US does a complementary health survey every few years. The last one, done in 2012 and published in 2016, showed that a third of the population uses complementary treatments. That’s around 100

million people. 9.5% of those 100 million were practicing yoga specifically for health conditions. If we fast forward another ten years, it will probably be closer to 20%. So a good proportion of people understand the stress relieving effects of yoga. When I speak to people I usually hear, “It’s really good for relieving stress.” So the common mindset is changing and will continue to do so. Q: Wonderful. Heather, what is your plan for yoga Day?

I sent a proposal to the Indian High Commission, as we want to have a big event in Trafalgar Square. Two other things will happen, regardless: Paul Fox and I have authored a book called Yoga on Prescription, and we will launch the book on June 22; and on June 27 there’s a parliamentary group on yoga in Society that’s going to meet in Parliament. I hope a representative of Heartfulness will come for this. Q: We will be happy to join you, Heather, and with your future endeavors. Finally, what led you to call your organization the Minded Institute?

18

H eart f u l n es s

One day I was driving home, and I had an epiphany that I would create programs for yoga for mental health. I thought of Yoga for the Mind, but that was not descriptive enough. I think sometimes things just arise when you meditate a lot. Knowing sometimes comes from the ether, and it’s not analytical. Q: Thank you so much, Heather. We have benefited from understanding how you set up your work on trauma, and how you see it changing the world in the days to come. We’ll be following you closely, and hope that a lot of people will read this and be inspired to join you. Thank you so much for being with us, and for what you do.

Thank you. It was lovely being here.


For Self-development VERONIQUE NICOLAI is the Director of the Heartfulness Yoga Academy and the coordinator of the Yoga4Unity platform. As a pediatrician, she is also passionate about mental and physical well-being for all ages, especially children. Here she is interviewed by VARSHA KUSHWAHA of the Heartfulness Institute about her own journey of yoga.

Ju n e 2 02 2

19


ELF-CARE S EL F-CARE

Q: Thanks for joining us Dr. Veronique. We wish to know where your journey started, and how is it you’re here today?

The Heartfulness way offers all the limbs of yoga, including asanas and pranayama. It encompasses the entire philosophy of yoga, based on the Vedas, Sankhya philosophy, and Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras, all for modern life.

20

Thank you for inviting me. To make it short, I started with Heartfulness Meditation, a modern form of Raja Yoga. I didn’t start with asana and pranayama but directly with meditation. It answered the need I had when young to understand myself better. That’s why I also became a doctor, to understand how we work. Why Heartfulness? I was impressed with the people who were doing it. To be precise, they attracted me because they were joyful. I felt they were well established in their family, successful in their profession, fun and authentic. I could be who I wanted to be, and it was extremely relaxing. Maybe that’s the purpose of yoga, to feel relaxed. I wanted to know what made them like that, and made me feel that way in their presence? There was joy. Only much later I discovered that yoga is all about inner joy. I didn’t stumble into yoga after a trauma or an event. I was having quite a nice life, but I did have a question from childhood onward: “Why are we here?” I would ask, “Why go to bed if I have to wake up in the morning?” I felt that deep search for the purpose of life.

H eart f u l n es s

By the age of 21, I had an apartment, I was studying to be a doctor, I had great relationships with friends, and I thought, “If this is life, then I’m done. It can’t just be this! What am I going to do for the rest of my life?” I needed to find something deeper. And when I met people who were meditating, I could see that they didn’t have the same insecurity. Heartfulness did not give me immediate answers, but it showed me a path so I knew the answers would come. I think everyone has the same question at some stage in their life. One day it comes. Some suppress it, but it’s there in everyone. For many years, I was part of a team coordinating an international scholarship program for Heartfulness, with people coming from many countries, especially those where we didn’t have trainers. They would spend a month with us and go back to their countries as trainers. We had amazing people from all walks of life, from Burkina Faso, Sri Lanka, South America, CIS countries, Southeast Asia, the Middle East, etc. Heartfulness Meditation is simple. You don’t need a mantra, chanting, or any preparation. It’s silent. You don’t need an education. Even if you cannot read and write,


SE L F - CA RE

you will receive the same benefit when you meditate. There is no need to speak. That’s its strength. Heartfulness is for everyone. Nowadays, the Heartfulness way offers all the limbs of yoga, including asanas and pranayama. It encompasses the entire philosophy of yoga, based on the Vedas, Sankhya philosophy, and Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras, all for modern life. It’s extremely practical. You cannot know by

reading or by watching other people do it. Heartfulness Meditation is supported by Pranahuti (from the word “prana,” which means energy). We call it Transmission in English. It is the subtlest energy that flows from the heart of the trainer to the heart of the practitioner, and it was the key for me. I will remember that first experience all my life. After I had my introductory sessions,

Ju n e 2 02 2

I was walking home from the trainer’s place and I wanted to tell everyone, “This is so simple. This is available.” I wanted to wake up my entire city. I was in France at that time. To this day, that has been my effort, the revelation was so strong. Many Heartfulness volunteers have a similar experience and dedication. We want to give time to train others, because it’s the best thing that has happened to us. Actually,

21


S ELF-CARE

for yoga teachers, the spirit of service is part of the fiber of our being. In Heartfulness, the trainers never charge for the practices. Meditation with a trainer, with Pranahuti, is a catalyst for growth. You see the results quickly without much effort. It is like climbing a mountain; you can climb up on your own, or you hold onto a rope and go up much faster. Pranahuti is the rope that takes you up. You just make the effort to sit in meditation every day. Of course, there is practice, there is continuity, and there is discipline. Once you have all three, you

22

become effective in everything you do. You work faster, make better choices, and manage your time better. For me, time management equals meditation. When I am all over the place, and I’m not able to get to where I want to be, I first align myself by doing my practice well. I then become more efficient, to manage my life successfully and give back. I think we’re here for that. Q: When you say yoga, I only think of asanas. I think meditation comes later in life. So how do asanas, meditation, and all the other parts of yoga fit together?

H eart f u l n es s

Heartfulness is known for meditation, but it has always been based on Patanjali’s Ashtanga Yoga philosophy. What is asana? In Patanjali’s words, it means to be comfortable and stable in your posture so that you can sit for meditation. Heartfulness starts with meditation, but there is still a need to take care of the body. Being a doctor, I know it’s very important to do something for the body. I used to do all kinds of sports, like anybody raised in the West. I came to yoga later. At the beginning, I


SE L F - CA RE

didn’t like it much, because it was too slow for me, my mind was too fast; but asanas have definitely helped me. They are good preparation. Even if you already meditate, asanas are a fantastic way to take care of your health. You can hit the gym, swim, and walk, but if you want to do something that is complete and aligned to your practice of meditation, then yoga is a great way to take care of your body. The asanas evolved that way. In ancient times, when yogis meditated, they sat for hours. Their muscles, their strength, even their nervous system started withering away, because they were not using them. So they devised a way to take care of the body, too. asanas support meditation. Start with meditation, then include pranayama, and then use asanas to prolong the condition that you have after meditation. There’s another element that’s extremely important. In Heartfulness we meditate on the heart, reconnecting us to the heart. Children bring joy because they’re in touch with their hearts so completely and freely. In psychology, we know that children develop ego at the age of three. They start to say “I” when they speak. Before that, they live in the

present and bring joy to the whole family.

Asanas are a

Unfortunately, when we educate the brain, and the mind takes over, we start remembering and worrying, so we’re no longer in the present. Linking people back to the heart is the most important thing we can do. In Heartfulness Yoga, before we do any asanas, we sit on the mat and connect to the heart. Then, throughout the practice, we come back to the heart. Meditation connects us to the heart and nourishes the qualities of the heart.

take care of your

From the perspective of the chakras, the heart chakra is the middle one; it’s connected to all the other chakras. So we start with the heart chakra, nourish it, and clean it. asanas and pranayama are also all about cleaning and preparing. We prepare the mind to be still. So, in Heartfulness Yoga, we start from inside with meditation, developing the qualities of the heart, and from outside we also shape the body.

fantastic way to health. You can hit the gym, swim, and walk, but if you want to do something that is complete and aligned to your practice of meditation, then yoga is a great way to take care of your body.

To be continued.

Ju n e 2 02 2

23


24

H eart f u l n es s


LAILAH GIFTY AKITA

Ju n e 2 02 2

inspiration

Listen to your heart, it will guide you on the right path.

25


FOUR ATTITUDES That Will Transform Your Life Forever Everyone is looking for guidance to navigate the uncertainty and challenges that we collectively face in today’s world. Sometimes the source of such guidance has been right in front of us all along, and all we need is a simple reminder that the answers to our deepest problems are within our grasp. DAAJI shares an ancient source with us, enlightening us on four simple atttitudes that keep us safe in all storms.


INS P IRATION

I

n the 1st century BC, King Herod the Great built a palace in the Judaean desert near Jerusalem. A few years ago, scientists discovered 2000-yearold seeds at the ruins of the palace, and when they planted those seeds, seven date palms grew. During twenty centuries of excruciating desert climate, the life force within those seeds was preserved. There are some seeds that have survived even longer and are available to all of us, the ancient seeds of wisdom we find in the Yoga Sutras. Thousands of years ago, the great spiritual scientist Patanjali taught his students about a way of life that could transform human existence. He showed them the path to infinity.

Unfortunately, very little is known about who Patanjali was and what he did to achieve this knowledge. However, the 196 seeds of wisdom, the sutras he shared with his students, are with us today. What is a sutra? It’s not a verse or hymn. Neither is it advice nor a mantra. A sutra is a coded word. Like a seed, it’s an open secret of nature that encapsulates immense wisdom and actionable guidance. One can spend an entire lifetime decoding and demystifying just one sutra. And here, Patanjali gave the world 196 of them! From his Yoga Sutras, I would like to share with you the transformative wisdom of one Sutra – number 33.

Ju n e 2 02 2

Why is Sutra 33 important? By cultivating the four attitudes recommended in this Sutra, we create an inner environment that calms the turbulence in our consciousness. By leading our lives by these attitudes, we cultivate correct thinking, right understanding, and an honest approach to our life. When such is the case, life is enlivened with authenticity. Authenticity opens the doors to transformation. It gives us the capacity to accept more and more change. This change is no longer lukewarm and tepid. Instead, it’s a burning fire of transformation that creates the gleaming gold of a life well-led.

27


IN SP I RAT IO N

So here it goes, Sutra 33 from Patanjali for a transformative life: Maitrī-karuṇā-mudito-pekṣāṇāṁ sukha-dukkha-puṇyapuṇya viṣayāṇāṁ bhāvanātaḥ citta-prasādanam “The right inner environment is created by cultivating these four attitudes: friendliness toward the happy ones, compassion toward victims of misery, joy toward the virtuous, and indifference toward the non-virtuous.” To understand the wisdom of these four attitudes, let’s start with a contrarian approach: Attitude 1: Friendliness toward the happy ones

What happens when your friend is happy? Imagine that your friend buys a dazzling silver Mercedes and invites you over for a party. Or another friend throws an early retirement bash thanks to a successful business sale. How do you feel? Are you happy for them? Are you also a bit envious: “Why them and not me?” So your friend buys a new car and you are envious. The other friend makes money and your sleep is ruined. Because of social etiquette, you might not express these feelings openly, but they do cross your heart and sometimes they linger for some time. Now, what happens when you are genuinely friendly toward those who are happy? What happens when you share in the joys of others? Try it and see for yourself. You will find that you genuinely partake in their happiness in some magical way. Your heart will expand, and you will grow as a 28

Authenticity opens the doors to transformation. It gives us the capacity to accept more and more change.

H eart f u l n es s


INS P IRATION

human being. This is a matter of experience. When the attitude of friendliness toward the happy ones becomes permanent, you may not be wealthy, but the wealthy enjoy your company; you may not be powerful, but the powerful are there for you; you may not be an emperor, but the entourage supports you. Most importantly, even if none of this happens, the seeds of happiness sown in the heart blossom into a forest of contentment. Attitude 2: Compassion toward victims of misery

When a co-worker shares their health issues related to diabetes and hypertension, how do you react? Externally you may share your sympathy, but inside do you judge their lifestyle? “Oh, he eats unhealthy food,” “She never

exercises,” “All that smoking, what else can you expect?” When someone is miserable, do you judge, or does their pain prick your heart? Does your heart miss a beat and ooze with compassion seeing the misery of others? When you judge others, you will regret it afterward. In your quiet time, perhaps when you reflect at bedtime or write a journal, you will berate yourself, “Why did I do such a thing?” Your inner poise is gone. People going through problems don’t need much in terms of help. They need someone to listen and acknowledge that what they are going through must feel terrible. Listening with compassion and acknowledging their misery gives people the strength to work on a solution. We do this with children all the time. A little girl falls while

running, and grandparents lift the child, caressing her and applying the first aid of love and attention. In a few moments, she is running again. We may have grown up physically, but our emotional needs are the same. Compassion, attention, and care go a long way to heal the hurt of misery. So be generous with your compassion. Attitude 3: Joy toward the virtuous

How do you react when you see virtue in action? When you see someone efface themselves with humility, do you think of it as noble behavior or do you see it as weak? When you see acts of generosity, do you appreciate them or look for an ulterior motive? There is a general tendency to regard virtue with suspicion. Why is this so? Suspicion tricks us into thinking that there must be something darker lurking beneath.

The seeds of happiness sown in the heart blossom into a forest of contentment.

Ju n e 2 02 2

29


I N SP I RAT IO N

When we express joy toward the virtuous, we create a vacuum that is devoid of suspicion, comparison, and competitiveness. Into such a heart, grace descends naturally. It’s like building a low-pressure area where clouds collect and pour down rain. Through such downpours of grace, we cultivate such virtues ourselves, even without our making efforts to do so. So celebrate the virtuous around you with a heart full of joy. Attitude 4: Indifference toward the non-virtuous

Energy flows where attention goes. Patanjali’s prescription for cultivating indifference might sound like he is asking us to look the other way in the face of evil, but what he is urging us to do is not to spend time and energy focusing on the evil in a person’s behavior, because what you pay attention to will grow.

If you are a soldier fighting an enemy, let duty be your driving force, not hatred for the enemy. Once the seeds of hate land in your heart they will keep growing long after the enemy is gone. It’s the same message Lord Jesus gave from the cross: “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” It’s the same message Lord Rama gave when Ravana was breathing his last; he sent Lakshmana to gather words of wisdom from the learned Ravana. In all these examples, we learn that in the battle of good versus evil, love versus hate, right versus wrong, we do not become virtuous

When we express joy toward the virtuous, we create a vacuum that is devoid of suspicion, comparison, and competitiveness. Into such a heart, grace descends naturally.

30

H eart f u l n es s

by condemning the other to judgment. Instead, we grow by nurturing goodness in the heart. These attitudes have inspired me personally to act and transform. A simple way to start implementing them is to pick one. Then, before going to bed, offer a prayer, seeking help, guidance, and strength to implement that attitude in life. Do this for a few days, and please let me know about your experience. Illustration by JASMEE MUDGAL



50 years of

BREATHING By the end of the 1960s, Westerners were traveling to India to visit Babuji. Among the first were the Danes, who all fell in love with Babuji and were instrumental in bringing the spiritual practices of Heartfulness to the West. One of these pioneers was THOMAS MOGENSEN, who first visited Shahjahanpur in 1971 with his wife and some friends. Here he shares the value of 50 years of Heartfulness.

I

n my Guide and Guru, Ram Chandra, Babuji as we called him, I found the help I needed – mentally, physically and spiritually. I also found a person who, in all his silent simplicity, became my friend and the very breath of my life, as is the current Guide, Daaji today. Back then, they called our system of meditation Sahaj Marg – the Natural Way. And what is more natural than breathing? We all breathe. Without it we are dead. Without a beating heart and a breath there is no flow of anything.


INS P IRATION

live in the past. He is not hanging onto anything. He doesn’t expect anything, not from you and not from me. He doesn’t remember yesterday and before, cling to it, or get stuck in it. He is always here, now, urging us to forget and become. A new way of breathing. A new way of moving through life. That is meditation in a nutshell. That was what I needed back then, still now, and tomorrow as well.

That was the condition in which my Guide found me, not I him, 50 years ago. He was and still is “the finder.” He finds us and leads us on to find our true natural way of life. He breathes it into our hearts. Hidden to us, it is something we already are every second of the day, and the night as well. We sleep and we breathe. We breathe and we live. So, why yoga and meditation if that breath of life is not there? Who wants to struggle with a lifeless yoga? Who cares to meditate for hours, breathe in certain odd ways, recite endless mantras, or fall to their knees

with non-stop praying? The only thing we really need is to forget ourselves. Forget who we are. Forget who we think we should be, so that we can become what we have always been, a breath of life. Such a method sounds so easy. And it is easy. You don’t need to sit with a straight back and legs crossed for hours and hours suppressing yourself into some sort of mindset. That is what practitioners of yoga have sadly often done, and some of us still do, because we still live in the past. In my Guide and Guru, I am daily found. By someone who doesn’t

So, dear sisters and brothers, whoever reads this, I wish you peace, tranquility, and prosperity. We all worry about our lives, children, grandchildren, pandemics, and wars. Apart from the methods themselves, what have 50 years of Heartfulness Meditation given me to tackle all these worries and my own inner turmoil? In the most simple terms, the Guide gave me a friend. One who doesn’t want to teach me anything except to breathe in the most common natural way. In such a breath of life, a mere possibility to move on, we can all be, and become unknown to ourselves. We can know the Unknown. For that I am forever thankful. For that I am forever on the road.



MICHELLE OBAMA

WORKPLACE

We need to do a better job of putting ourselves higher on our own “to do” list.


KINDRED SPIRITS: Transforming Darkness into Creativity MELISSA BERNSTEIN is the co-founder of Melissa & Doug, a toy company with a mission to “provide a launch pad to ignite imagination and a sense of wonder in all children so they can discover themselves, their passions, and their purpose.” In this article, EMILIE MOGENSEN starts with a simple interview approach with Melissa, which blossoms into much more – a meeting of kindred spirits!

36

H eart f u l n es s


“I

am fearful, oh, so fearful, that if you do not show me light I will lose the will to live, and choose to end this futile fight.” Back in 1970, this verse was written by a 5-year-old girl, who learned early in life that expressing her innermost vulnerable feelings in creative writing was not merely an expression of words, it was a way to survive. Originally, the intention of this article was to write a portrait of a very successful and conscious entrepreneur. But that seemed too linear for her. It feels true to the essence of her lively, ethereal, and delicate being, to instead share a mystical and most rewarding story of how a meeting on Zoom turned into a sweet connection between two creative souls. When I first experienced Melissa Bernstein, she was a guest speaker at The Inner MBA, which I am currently doing through Mindful NYU, Sounds True and LinkedIn. I was unaware that I had been buying her designs over the years as toys for my kids. I discovered

Ju n e 2 02 2

37


WOR KP L AC E

that when I looked her up and recognized the online red logo of “Melissa & Doug.” I was taken by storm from the moment I saw her. She was free and fun, loving and sharing. Melissa has created more than 10,000 toys and made millions of children happy around the world. I was especially inspired when Melissa spoke about being a “white space creative.” I could relate to that frame of mind, or should I say lack of frame of mind: an ability to see the entire universe of a certain project, long

before the first drawing is even made; an intuitive, delicate, and very sensitive ability to open up and allow the stream of creative inspiration to come through the body, in order to manifest into a product or artistic expression. I found myself tearing up several times during the one hour gathering we had with her. That inspired me to reach out to her – I wanted more!

So I am meeting Melissa on Zoom and we bond immediately in a very natural way. We dive into a very personal and vulnerable conversation about my journey as an entrepreneur. I share with her how I had to close down my company after two years with a wrongly-matched investor on board. She listens and asks questions, is compassionate, caring, and very intriguing. So, here I am, having forgotten all my planned interview questions, in a fruitful and connecting conversation about life and death,


WORKP LAC E

She has transformed these tormenting shadows through intense therapy, heart centering, and her neverending need to express herself creatively, through toys and writing verses.

heart-centered entrepreneurship, and how draining it can be to insist on cultivating intuition and sensitivity in a harsh business world. Her joyful spirit makes me feel seen and appreciated, for what and who I am, in my innermost real place. In her presence, I unfold and expand my intuitive and creative wings in a free and relaxed way. Later in our conversation, I discover that this happy spirit of hers was not always so happy. Melissa suffered from severe depression over more than two decades. Design and creativity were literally a lifeline for her. She needed to express herself creatively in order to transform what she calls her inner darkness. Inner despair, suicidal thoughts at the age of 19, and profound inner shadows, were part of Melissa’s journey. She has transformed these tormenting shadows through intense therapy, heart centering, and her never-ending need to express herself creatively, through toys and writing verses. She now helps many people through her newly-established entrepreneur adventure, Lifelines,

which assists people to transform their inner darkness. I don’t want to go into details about the achievements of Melissa and her husband Doug. You can Google their extraordinary journey – two entrepreneurs, who have been happily married for more than 35 years, with six kids. Today, Melissa & Doug has a net worth of nearly 1 billion USD. Seen through the eyes of an average person like myself, this seems like the classic, slightly overwhelming, and maybe even intimidating fairytale of the American dream. But there is no such energy around her; she is not overwhelming and intimidating. She shows up as a very authentic, present, and feminine person, with wet hair after her morning shower, openhearted, curious, and joyful. I know that we can trust each other, and so does she. We laugh, skip all the surface talk, and jump right into the deepest and most painful parts of ourselves, sharing them in a space of mutual trust and empathy. My intuitive feeling of a new world dawning, where like-minded people from different communities meet and connect, despite


sitting on different continents with different backgrounds and nationalities, is unfolding in front of me. Feelings of deep meaning, gratitude, and connection bring me great joy in the two hours we talk, laugh, share, and connect. We talk about how it has taken her many years to truly believe in herself, when surrounded by commercial people who use the left side of the brain in their work. It is a personal coaching session for me. I take it all. It resonates profoundly with my own journey

as an intuitive creative in the business world.

week to dive deep and transform together.

She clearly feels in her body how the powerful urge to create can feel like a blessing in disguise. She even has a word for it, “Blurse” (blessing-curse). Coming from a family with a lot of creative entrepreneurs, I can relate to this rather exhausting paradox.

A part of me is soothed by her presence. Something about her having gone through inner pain, questioning her reason to stay alive, yet creating a company with more than 800 employees, fascinates me. There is a hidden power in her, behind the downto-earth, smiling, and curious personality.

When Melissa starts sharing with me, she always checks in with her heart before taking any decision. I mention to her that I am a trainer of Heartfulness meditation. She immediately feels inclined to meditate together, and we clear three days during the following

She shares how hard she has worked with her therapist to transform her anxiety and need to control the outer world. I resonate with this constant need to manage and balance feelings, as they are the main drivers toward the best ideas. Shutting down feelings, which we feel forced to do when dealing with business people, can be counter-productive. We stop getting ideas. Nevertheless, it is crucial for mental stability to learn emotional management. Some of the best artists throughout history are known for their mood swings and difficult lives. Creativity often goes hand in hand with emotional challenges, in my experience, and Melissa certainly seems to fit this category. Her courage to transform this sensitivity into her superpower is inspiring, and I feel it comes from a very authentic place.

40

H eart f u l n es s


We bond very nicely on a personal level, sharing an intuitive and creative approach to life and entrepreneurship. But in meditation with her, it becomes clear that she is more – a kindred spirit. A deep sense of knowing is present in our three 30-minute meditations, and I find myself smiling many times. It feels the same as when I am at a concert; the power of the collective, sharing deep feelings, coming through one individual. It’s fascinating how one individual can channel something and impact the masses, like she does with her toys and her new company, Lifelines.

Why am I sharing this rather intimate space of meditation in an article? Because I feel the purpose of Melissa Bernstein is to inspire people to be exactly who they are. She courageously allows us into her innermost vulnerable place, and shows us how transforming darkness can make us come out stronger. It’s priceless and honorable, and profoundly needed in today’s world, where young people suffer from FOMO and low self-esteem. With Social Media, we brand ourselves, artificially, through the filters of so-called beauty. Melissa unlocks creative potential in me, and transforms it into dynamic and balanced new energy. She engages in my journey, her thinking is free and expansive, and she keeps reminding me about the crucial need to be truthful to myself and my values. Always.

Ju n e 2 02 2

I pray, sending out the intention that more and more people in this suffering world will follow the example of Melissa, unlocking their inner and most truthful creative potential in order to cocreate a wonderful world, where kindred spirits meet and meditate together. Thank you, Melissa, for your ability to show us how to transform darkness into creativity. You make me feel like showing up as the best version of myself, where I create from the full potential within. Illustrations by ARATI SHEDDE

41


JUST THINKING AND FEELING

The Benefits of DOING NOTHING DR. ICHAK ADIZES is an expert in change management for organizations. Here he shares some thoughts on doing nothing, and how he creates the space to do that through a yogic meditation practice.

E

very day in the modern world poses an increasing number of problems and opportunities in our lives. There are so many existing and new oppor-threats, that we simply don’t have enough time to address them all. We are all busy, and if we slow down for even a second, we feel guilty because “there is so much to do.” But if you stop for an interval of time and do nothing, you might find it has its benefits. First, doing nothing gives you the time to reminisce; to review what you are doing and analyze whether or not you should continue doing it. You get to see the value, or the futility, of doing something or anything. Doing nothing for a moment is like pulling yourself out of a picture, so that you can see the picture from a different perspective. We all know how difficult it is to see the picture when you are in it. 42

When you do nothing, you give yourself the opportunity to ask, “Is it time to change?” Filling your time with something to do is a perfect escape from yourself, while doing nothing forces you, sometimes painfully, to face yourself and your concerns. I have noticed an interesting phenomenon among people who ask for a divorce. I asked them: When did the idea germinate? When was the final decision to make a change “born”? It often happened when the person was on vacation or sick in bed with nothing to do. When you do nothing, you give yourself a chance to review everything. In the Hindu tradition, zero and infinity are related. Everything is nothing. Nothing is everything. Another benefit of doing nothing for an interval of time is that

H eart f u l n es s

it provides space for creating something new. When your brain is fully engaged it is not available to be creative. I have found an interesting common denominator among my entrepreneurial clients: When they were young, they were either sick for a long time or, for some other reason, they were alone with nothing to do. Having nothing to do, they had to create something by themselves. Often they did lots of daydreaming, and over time they developed their dream, which became their reality. With nothing to do, they had the time to evaluate their past and make plans for the future. What I have been saying so far boils down to this: Having nothing to do is a prerequisite for making a change. Have you ever had the resolve to make a strategic change when you were stressed to catch a plane? Look at a train. To


WORKPLAC E

change the rails it is riding on it needs to slow down, or even stop all together. Full speed ahead and changing direction are not compatible activities. (P) and (E) are incompatible roles. You need (I) in the middle to enable change. Having nothing to do can create the opportunity to make a strategic change in one’s life. What may seem to be a problem could be a blessing in disguise. Many entrepreneurs started their companies after they were fired from their previous jobs and had nothing to do for a while. Being employed, and struggling to remain employed, used all the limited energy they had; they simply didn’t have the energy to even think about starting a business. Getting fired was the best thing that could have happened to them. It gave them the time and energy to analyze what they really wanted to do with their lives and what strategic changes they wanted to make. Recession might also be a blessing in disguise. Falling sales, falling production, and less pressure to fulfill orders all provide a window of opportunity for the decision makers to reevaluate the past and implement strategic changes for the future.

Ju n e 2 02 2

43


Now a word of warning: Watching TV or reading a book in the shade of your sun umbrella or swimming or surfing or biking ... none of them count as doing nothing. They could be classified as vacation, but not as “doing nothing.” Nothing means nothing. Nothing means having no agenda, no goal to achieve, nothing that engages your mind in any way. Nothing means that your mind is allowed to be free to wander. In yoga, lying relaxed on the floor (the “dead person pose”) is a pose in itself and a very important one. One has to know how to do

44

nothing. It is a science and an art in itself. How, then, should you go about doing nothing? Here is what I believe is the answer: You will never find the time to do nothing; you have to consciously and intentionally take the time to do nothing. The easiest way to implement this philosophy of life is to meditate. I meditate twice a day for an hour. If you do not want to meditate, make a commitment to sit and do nothing every day for an hour without feeling guilty about it. Have a pad and a pen available; you may be surprised

H eart f u l n es s

by what you will think up. Doing nothing is doing something very important. It enables you to change, and in the hectic world in which we live, change is a prerequisite for success. Just thinking and feeling, Dr. Ichak Kalderon Adizes https://www.ichakadizes.com/ post/the-benefits-of-doingnothing



relationships 46

H eart f u l n es s


Remember the blue sky. It may at times be obscured by clouds, but it is always there. ANDY PUDDICOMBE

Ju n e 2 02 2

47


The Universal language of life


RE L AT ION S HI P S

THOM BOND is a thought leader, peace educator, author, and mediation consultant who is best known for The Compassion Course. He’s the founder and Director of Education for the New York Center for Nonviolent Communication. He is interviewed by ELIZABETH DENLEY about his journey, his mentor, Marshall Rosenberg, and what drives our behavior and responses to life.

Q: Welcome, Thom.

Thank you, it’s great to be here. Q: I’ve heard so much about your Compassion Course, and am particularly interested in how you’ve taken Nonviolent Communication to the next level with compassion and your idea of “engineering peace,” beyond the nonviolent aspect to something that goes toward a very positive solution.

When I wrote the course, my father challenged me not to use the words “Nonviolent Communication,” and I realized that Marshall Rosenberg also did not like the moniker of Nonviolent

Communication, because it says what it isn’t, not what it is. More than that, Nonviolent Communication now has the reputation of being a language model. You can learn to say certain words and, abracadabra, you will get along with everybody and resolve all your conflicts. In some ways that is true, but there has to be something behind those words. You can’t just say the words. I have seen folks who were so focused on trying to get the words right that they simply took their habitual patterns and applied them to this. I wanted to take a completely different approach: not a language model, but an awareness of what

Ju n e 2 02 2

49


REL AT IO N SH I P S

is going on within us and around us. That was the idea behind The Compassion Book. People could learn to communicate from the perspective of awareness, and it was a big deal to help people over the line. It was heartbreaking when people would say, “Well, I used NVC on my husband, I used all the right words, and it didn’t do anything.” So I asked, “How can we figure out a way to get right to the beautiful foundation of what Marshall discovered?” Q: What do you mean by the word “compassion”? It is used everywhere these days. Is it possible for humanity to arrive at a compassionate peaceful place during this crazy time? Obviously you have a vision behind your Compassion Course that’s bigger than the individual. What else is going on?

I’ve been trying to capture that, and I think I have in the term Homo compass. Right now we are Homo sapiens, and our species has a design flaw – we get angry on a level that no other creature does. We see animals defend themselves and get packed with adrenaline, but no creature sustains the level of judgment and enemy images that we do. This is our challenge as a species.

50

My long-term thing is that we need to evolve, literally, to become a species that does not kill itself. What does that look like? There’s a list of answers, and one of them is that we become really good at conflict resolution, just like we’re good at building things, we’re good at other things. Part of that is to learn to counteract our impulses. I love the word “compass.” It’s not just from compassion. There are around twelve definitions,

H eart f u l n es s

and I love them all. I wish that humans would understand that we’re genetically at a disadvantage. Our bodies were designed to live in a culture that’s no longer to be found. It’s time to adapt, we have to become the next version, and how do we do that? Some of us have a deep intuitive sense that anger and judgment just don’t work. There has to be an alternative. That’s what got me going.


RE L AT IONSHI PS

The My Lai massacre happened in 1968, when I was twelve years old. I saw it in Life Magazine, and it was astounding to me that humans could do that. I grew up with World War Two movies, but I never saw a three-year-old crying hysterically, running barefoot down a road surrounded by bodies. That vision will never leave me. At that moment, I thought, “This is not working for me, I don’t want to live in a world like this.” It was a painful time between that moment and thirty years later when I read Marshall Rosenberg’s book. I was having a relationship issue so somebody recommended

it. I don’t think they realized what they were handing me. It was the answer to a terrible quandary, and I thought, “This works.” My background is in engineering, so I love to find solutions to problems. Usually it’s some form of technology, like this LED light bulb I designed. Marshall’s work was like the light bulb. It works! What works? When we develop a consciousness of the parallel universe of life. We have a really amazing connection to life, and it guides our behavior. Life wants life. This is something I’ve learned. When we connect to life, we’re connecting to the life in us, we’re

What works? When we develop a consciousness of the parallel universe of life. We have a really amazing connection to life, and it guides our behavior.

Ju n e 2 02 2

connecting to the life in other people. Life transcends culture if we find the universal language of life. The reason it’s a universal language is because we’re going through exactly the same thing, you and me. We’re having a different experience of it, but we’re all humans, right? This struck me so powerfully, and I met Marshall so quickly, it was kind of nutty. I also met Albert Ellis, who was my therapist. Marshall and I were working together in New York at the same time that I was working with Albert, and Marshall said, “I don’t want to meet him.” Marshall almost felt guilty that he had copied some of Albert’s work. Everything we do, we do to meet a need. Also, everything we think, we think to meet a need. Albert helped me with that. I’d also worked with The Landmark Forum, which helped me to understand that I am not my thoughts and I’m not who I think I am. It opened up the possibility of being whoever I wanted to be. Then came the question: Who do you want to be? That’s when I fell in love with Marshall’s work, because it was the answer. I could figure out who I wanted to be every moment of the day because of him. And I could help other people figure it out, too.

51


REL AT IO N SH I P S

The idea of connecting to needs was a life-changer for me, and I knew it would work for others. We really need this. But I have to be trustworthy as a teacher because I am asking a lot of others. I’m asking a lot of myself, too. I look at it as a sacred responsibility; it’s critical that I never say anything that’s not true. When I teach, I follow the first two rules of training: show up, which is pretty important, and know what you don’t know and live with that. If you tell somebody something that’s not true, they can never trust you again, even if they want to. There’s going to be a part of

them that says, “Remember that time?” So, we took this on very seriously, which is another reason I wanted to get away from NVC terminology, because there were folks saying they were doing it who weren’t. I wanted to separate ourselves and give people a second chance to look at the work.

in the other direction, with

Q: You’re dealing with language

into everything, and it expresses

as an interface into awareness,

through the human voice. So,

especially of the feeling level of

what you’re doing is fascinating

existence. You’re going beneath

and cutting edge, because

the surface to look at needs

many people do contemplative

and longings, people’s intimate

practices without translating the

space. Like you said, there’s a

inner change into their way of

responsibility to be trustworthy,

interacting with the world.

communication, to help discover what’s happening on the inside. The first teacher in Heartfulness, Lalaji, said that sound is the manifestation of the universe. It’s the essence of the energy that was there from the beginning, before the Big Bang. It moved

to make it safe. In Heartfulness, sound, and therefore language

With you, I noticed you do two

and the human voice are the

things: you talk about ways of

transmission or expression

communication, but you also

of inner awareness, the

talk about the importance of

consciousness that we’re

being in silence and listening to

holding. So, it works both ways.

yourself and to what’s going on around as a way of coming back

In Heartfulness, we work from

from some state. Whether that’s

the inside out; by meditating,

angry or anxious, you use this

we’re working with the inner

method of pausing, of silence, to

universe, especially the

recalibrate yourself. Can you talk

subconscious, to remove

about what you do and how you

patterns, to remove neural

do it?

hardwiring. This brings an openness to change, and that change is vital for us to evolve if we’re going to get through the mess we’ve created. It means individual evolution, as well as species evolution. It affects our communication. You’re working

H eart f u l n es s

Have you ever heard, “Count to 10” when you’re angry? I thought, “I’ll do that.” I spent many years getting angry exactly 10 seconds later. That was not the answer. There was something else.


RE L AT IONSHI PS

What do we do in the space? What is the space for? We’re trying something that is not wired into us. We are culturally and genetically wired to get angry, so for us to make progress, to have choice in this, we really need to see this parallel universe. If we learn to use the space to see inside the parallel universe, what happens is easy, we almost can’t help it. That’s when I knew I was onto something. Otherwise, when you try not to get angry, sit there and try your damnedest, good luck! Let’s talk about why we’re angry, and then see if there isn’t some path. It is an easy path once we see it, but it’s not easy to see because our habitual mind wants to see something else. The path is to see the needs, have a relationship with them, and be able to articulate them. Once we articulate them, once we can see that life energy exists in us, once we start becoming aware of it and seeing it in others, then we articulate that. Then we go, “Oh, my goodness, my needs are bad, feelings are bad. I have all these habitual thoughts that are stopping me from getting into a beautiful relationship with life: “I should,” “I shouldn’t,” things that have nothing to do with life.

A part of the practice is to take that space and connect to life, stop the noise, stop the voices, and pay attention to something else. We don’t even have to stop them; we can just say, “Fine, go on voices, but I’m going to pay attention over here.” What I’m trying to do for folks, myself included, is to make the journey from a moment of anger, to having a resolution around it, not stomping it out, but turning it into something without making it go away. I don’t have to say, “Oh, anger, bad, go away!” Instead, I say, “Anger is telling me something. What is it?” Then we can work from that space.

Ju n e 2 02 2

A part of the practice is to take that space and connect to life, stop the noise, stop the voices, and pay attention to something else.


I call feelings the aura of needs, and needs are the impulses of life. Feelings tell us how we’re doing. Needs are the “doing” of life, the impulses of life.

Q: You talk about needs being in layers. You might start at the surface, what you perceive as being the need, and then you work down to what’s behind that, and what’s behind that, and what’s behind that. How does that work?

Well, life works that way, so all we have to do is observe life. Marshall gave us an incredibly accurate language that reflects

54

the experience of life. He did that both with feelings and needs. I call feelings the aura of needs, and needs are the impulses of life. Feelings tell us how we’re doing. Needs are the “doing” of life, the impulses of life. That’s what we work to understand.

as negative. In their pure form

Q: In the yogic traditions, the

Q: Fear is a cautionary thing,

so-called negative emotions,

that you need to pull back and

like anger (known as krodha in

discipline yourself, or look at

yoga) and fear, are not seen

where you’re going and what

H eart f u l n es s

they have a function that’s like a warning sign, “You need to look at this and something needs to change here.” They are change indicators.

Exactly. It’s a radar, you could say.


RE L AT ION S HI P S

you’re doing, as there might be danger ahead. Anger is more that something needs to shift. You can’t do much about another person’s behavior, but you

can look at your own reactions to what they’re doing, and say, “All right, how can I respond differently to bring about the best possible outcome?”

I just did an anger workshop this afternoon, so I’m really keyed up about this stuff. Anger is not a straight-out emotion, but an emotion from some unmet need. It’s a perspective that it should or shouldn’t be that way, right? It should be some other way. And that judgmental thinking blossoms into moralistic thinking, and all the different forms of judgment – all the daughters, sons, and cousins of it out there. Oddly enough, we

Remember, everything we do, we do to meet a need, including thinking things.

live our lives by those things. And those things aren’t life. They are thoughts, judgments, very human things.

So, I could say, “Oh, that’s why I think that.” Because I want to be inspired and motivated. What is it telling me that I value?

Needs are divine. The whole idea is to say, “This is telling me something. What’s the beautiful thing this is telling me?” For example, I’m thinking that I’m lazy. What is the beautiful message here? What is it telling me that I value, and what am I trying to do with it? Remember, everything we do, we do to meet a need, including thinking things. So why would I think I’m lazy? Well, it’s a tragic way of motivating myself.

My dad gave me the “lazy” thing, so I had to work with it. I realized that it is actually a sign I value productivity. Oh, my goodness, I love being productive. I love being effective. So, unfortunately, I was taught that one of the ways I could do that was by calling myself lazy. Just now I found the beautiful thing that “lazy” was telling me, so I don’t need lazy any more. Now I’m a person who loves to be effective. I know that. So I go


REL AT IO N SH I P S

straight to that, because that’s who I am. That’s who I want to be. There are tens of thousands of similar instances in our lives, like “lazy.” Whether it’s “evil,” “stupid,” or “selfish,” we have the opportunity to transcend each one. We hear the criticism from the viewpoint of Homo sapiens, but we can hear it again as Homo compass, at the same time, not making Homo sapiens wrong, but nurturing, empathizing with Homo sapiens. We can’t help it, so let’s have some compassion for that. Anyway, what are we doing while we’re judging ourselves for judging? It's like going into a hall of mirrors, and that’s the problem. For example, I don’t really like discussions of the ego. I don’t think it’s a helpful thing to say. I’m so glad I said that at the risk of not knowing if you get it! Q: I do, because we need the ego; it’s our identity. How to use it in a way that we’re not judging ourselves all the time?

Right. It doesn’t pay for us to think that the ego should be some other way than it is. It is what it is. I love having compassion for that.

What are we doing while we’re judging ourselves for judging? It's like going into a hall of mirrors, and that’s the problem.

Q: In yoga, the ego is just one of the subtle bodies of the mind. You can’t get rid of it as it is

56

H eart f u l n es s


part of our makeup. It’s how you learn to work with it, and the soft acceptance you have in moving forward in a positive way, that make it work or not work for you.

Or to make an enemy of it, or even monitor it, frankly. If I live in a world of judgment, then ego is a very important thing. But if I live in the world of life, then needs are the important thing. Really, what are needs? Needs are simply how we describe life. Those are the words that we use to express the experience we’re having Q: Which is just beautiful.

Yes, so simple and so difficult. To be continued.

If I live in a world of judgment, then ego is a very important thing. But if I live in the world of life, then needs are the important thing.

Ju n e 2 02 2

57


58

H eart f u l n es s


For Caretakers: HOW TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES The founder of Yoga Vahini, SARASWATHI VASUDEVAN, is interviewed by DR. VERONIQUE NICOLAI, Director, Heartfulness Yoga Academy, about the role yoga has to play in self-care for fulltime caregivers. Her simple 10-minute breathing practice and checklist of questions for caregivers are a must for everyone.

Q: Welcome everyone to this

Q: So, who is a caregiver? Could

podcast in the Yoga for Unity

you define it for us?

series. My guest today is Saraswathi Vasudevan, a yoga teacher and yoga therapist, who has been teaching yoga for 30 years and is running institutes in Chennai and Hyderabad. She’s a student of T.K.V. Desikachar, son of the yoga legend, Shri T. Krishnamacharya. Today, Saraswathi addresses caregivers, the people we often forget. Saraswathi, first, thank you for being here with us today and taking the time.

Thank you for inviting me, Veronique.

I will focus today on family caregivers, the ones who are often invisible. They take care of people with chronic illnesses, requiring a lot of support, and often are not seen, acknowledged, or appreciated. They have great difficulty acknowledging that they also need to take care of themselves. Their mind and their whole being is fully consumed by taking care of the person who is ill. There are many medical conditions for which people require continuous support at

Ju n e 2 02 2

home, and even when there is medical support, often one family member is fully engaged in care. They are the people I want to reach. They need to become aware of the importance of the role they’re playing, and the need to take care of themselves to better care for others. They need to know how to take care of themselves. Q: I’m a caregiver, and very often I have the tendency, and even the willingness to forget myself – to give and to serve. You seem to be saying that this is not completely the right thing to do. Can you explain why?

59


How are you addressing your emotional needs? When they reflect upon these questions, they begin to recognize that there are many areas in their life that they are not paying enough attention to, because all their attention is on the person who needs help. Q: How will this help me as a caregiver? Will it change the way I behave, the way I help others?

We can start there. If I tell you to take care of yourself so that you can take care of the other person better, in all probability you may do something. If I tell you to do it just for yourself, you may not. When I meet patients with chronic conditions, I ask their caregivers, “When are you going to start yoga? When are you going to take care of this?” They usually say, “I don’t have time.” It is difficult to help caregivers see that they need help. I don’t mean outside help, but learning something for themselves.

How are your energy levels through the day?

So my questions to them are:

Do you eat when you’re hungry, and do you eat food that is nourishing? How is your digestion?

Are you sleeping well? When you wake, do you feel refreshed? Do you look forward to the day?

60

Do you get time to just sit down, breathe, and do something to take care of yourself ? Do you get a break, even if it is for a couple of hours to go for a short walk or meet some friends? Do you have a social life?

How are you addressing your physical aches and pains?

H eart f u l n es s

Let’s look at physical health. If a caregiver has to physically support their patient, lift them from the bed, wash them, etc., they need a lot of strength in the arms, shoulders, neck, and head. If they have to stand or bend a lot, they need strength in their lower back. All of us have general aches and pains, and in certain seasons they increase. A caregiver may not be hydrating themselves enough, or may not be eating food that is appropriate for them. They may have pain in the body that needs addressing. If they take care of themselves, they will have better flexibility and strength, and the energy will flow well in the body. It’s important


RE L AT ION S HI PS

that they’re able to breathe well. They can then do more and be more energetic, by learning to relax, rest, and sleep well. I wonder how many caregivers sleep deeply, because they are in a constant state of vigilance. A mind that is vigilant all the time doesn’t fully rest or fully sleep. Caregivers often have to learn how to rest and improve their sleep quality. For all this, yoga can help. It improves energy levels, reduces aches and pains, improves the circulation in the body, positively

impacts digestion and elimination, and improves sleep and the quality of rest, even if it is only for ten minutes.

Q: So now it really makes sense!

The mind also needs to rest, not just the body.

to stand for longer, and having

A yoga teacher is like a companion, someone you can talk to, who can give you a practice that is appropriate for you, who can listen to you. Because you are always listening to the sick person. A companion who works with you can be a great gift for a caregiver.

me to look into this. How do you

You started talking about the physical, and that speaks to me: having more strength in my back and arms, being able more energy for all the duties. That’s a good way to motivate propose we do that?

I start by offering short practices, a taste of what yoga can offer, starting with breathing.

Sit down for a few minutes, and quietly begin to watch your breath. Slowly deepen your exhalation. As you exhale, visualize unburdening yourself. Unburden your mind, unburden your senses, your whole body. Allow your whole body to relax as you exhale. As you inhale, visualize yourself drawing in fresh energy. Place your feet on the floor, so you draw it from the Earth, and the Earth will offer you that energy. That is very refreshing. Then go to the next step. As you inhale, raise your arms. As you exhale, lower your arms, from the sides or from the front. You’re beginning to exercise your shoulder muscles, arms, spine, and neck, so the breath flows in more deeply, and you’re able to exhale more comfortably.

Ju n e 2 02 2

61


Maybe you’ll get hooked on it. Do you have ten minutes, twice a day to do this? If the answer is no, then do it once a day for ten minutes. That’s what my teacher used to do. When a new student came, he would ask, “How much time do you have, and when can you do your practice? Can you find a tenminute slot?” They would say, “Okay, I will give that time to you.” It was as if they were giving the time to the teacher. They wanted to give that time because the teacher cared so much.

62

Start there. Invariably, if you experience even a little benefit you will want to do it and you will make time. You have to learn to make time in your mind. You have to make space for yourself in your mind, and that will create time. If you create space, time will be created. And if you create time, space will be created. Q: It works like that in everybody’s experience: you start with a small practice, a small demand that you can meet, and then you realize that it is very easy. You don’t need anything special to start yoga.

H eart f u l n es s

You have to make space for yourself in your mind, and that will create time. If you create space, time will be created. And if you create time, space will be created.


RE L AT ION SHI P S

As you said, the interaction with the yoga therapist also helps the caregiver. In your experience, how did that evolve with the caregivers you have followed? Can you give us some examples?

We work with people who come for yoga therapy. In particular, we’ve done a lot of work with children with special needs, so I started with their parents. Initially, I devised a program for parents, mostly mothers, because they are the ones who often take care, but it was very difficult to get them to come to a class because they didn’t have time. So we offered a yoga class for the parents and children together. And we asked for both parents, as most of the time it was one coming. We practice together, and it’s a lot of fun. The children run around, sometimes not even paying attention, but the parents have fun and they relax. It’s time for them. We have extra teachers to take care of the children, and we tell the parents, “Now it’s your time to practice. Don’t look at your children.” I work with a forum for special needs support called The Special World. We’ve been working together for ten years now. We also work with the Parivartan Foundation that offers support

Ju n e 2 02 2

63


REL AT IO N SH I P S

for people with Parkinson’s. More recently, some of my colleagues have started working with an institution in Mumbai called Caregiver Saathi, which provides resources and support for caregivers. I have been working with these three institutions actively. Q: What is the transformation you’ve witnessed? You said that parents have fun, they laugh, and of course they have the space to do that. Is there any other impact that you witness, or feedback that you receive?

Many parents now make time to practice yoga regularly, and they see a huge benefit. Some have become yoga teachers, to support their children, and support the community. They’re always eager to do something for their community, and they work with us. I sometimes bring them into my training. They talk about their role as a parent, so that the yoga trainees understand the world of special needs. They’re not only receiving, they’re also contributing to my community of teachers. That’s really wonderful. Q: So their tendency to give has even more possibility to expand. yoga brings life to who they are as giving persons. yoga allows them to be even better

64

caregivers. Is it something like that in your experience?

I would agree with that, but I would also say that somebody who gives all the time needs to learn to receive, needs to learn to ask for help, needs to learn to talk about where they need help. Their need for support is very important because that part is often completely eclipsed. They don’t see it for themselves. They need to learn that as well. Just by giving, giving, giving, where are you going? You can’t continue to exhale all the time; you have to inhale to exhale

H eart f u l n es s

better. I would like us to create a movement that brings more and more people who are giving care to others, empowering the people who require help and support, who are suffering; a movement that can help them to live happy, healthy, peaceful lives. They deserve it. They have to recognize that they deserve it, and they have to seek it and live it. Q: Thank you, Saraswathi, for this profound interaction.

Thank you, doctor.



environment


Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished. LAO TZU


68

H eart f u l n es s


E N V IRONMENT

TEJASWINI MANOGNA was crowned Miss Earth India 2019, and went on to represent India at the international Miss Earth competition. She is a multi-talented advocate for major environmental and humanitarian issues, a doctor, a dancer, a yoga trainer, an NCC cadet, and a philanthropist. Here she is interviewed by RAJESH MENON of the Heartfulness Institute about her visit to Kanha Shanti Vanam.

Q: Hello Tejaswini, it was a pleasure to have you here in Kanha Shanti Vanam.

Divine MISS EARTH Ju n e 2 02 2

My visit to Kanha Shanti Vanam came as a blessing. Entering Kanha felt like entering Lord Krishna’s Brindavan. I was given a very warm welcome, and everyone had a pleasant smile and calm attitude. I had the most beautiful experience visiting all the plantations and learning about the ideology behind the plants. I planted a camphor tree, visited the Heartyculture Nursery, and saw thousands of varieties of cactus, creepers, flowering plants and more. I visited the laboratory where a few of the most endangered species were being

69


EN VI RO N M EN T

propagated through tissue culture. It was a lovely experience holding the miniature plants in the culture bottles. I was impressed by how the clean zones were maintained. I was even more stunned to learn about the rainforest. It took a lot of effort to bring those species of plants here from the Western Ghats and the northeast. Normally they don’t grow in arid regions like 70

Hyderabad, so it’s a miracle they have grown so well here. Then I met Daaji, a very simple and approachable man with the nicest of hearts. Daaji was visiting the plants, and he gave me a Krishna Kamal flower and explained the concept of the Pandavas and Kauravas. I was extremely lucky to meditate with him. Initially, I was filled H eart f u l n es s

with gratitude. Later, I forgot I was sitting in front of him. It was absolute bliss. I felt deeply connected and want to come back again. I am thankful to Daaji for his ideology toward Nature, and to all the people who have been working for this initiative. I’m blessed to be a part of it.


E N V IRONMENT

Q: Since receiving the Divine Miss Earth India title, what have you been doing to protect and nurture Mother Earth?

as the Earth doesn’t belong to humans, humans belong to the Earth. Q: Do you feel it's possible?

My activities didn’t start because I won the title. I have been ecologically sensitized toward Nature and doing various activities since childhood. Miss Earth happened in the course of my journey, and it inspired me to work more, and made me feel even more responsible for protecting Nature for future generations. Mass tree plantation programs, climate change initiatives, sanitation drives, toilet construction for government school children, Say No to single use plastics, beach clean ups, ground water conservation, mass yoga camps, and animal protection have been a few of my campaigns. I have advocated for major environmental issues from local communities to international platforms, while promoting “Each One Plant One! Let’s kill the pollution before it kills us.” There’s a huge necessity to save Nature. I fear the next generations won’t be able to experience Nature as much as we have, and will suffer the consequences of the problems we have created, through no fault of theirs. It’s important we all come together to be responsible

Yes. I’m doing my best. But there’s so much more we need to do. As a responsible citizen, I shall continue to contribute to ecological security. Q: What inspires you these days?

I also believe in implementing the action plans in coordination with organizations. Kanha Shanti Vanam is one such amazing example of an organization preserving Nature. With the same inspiration, I wish to work together and contribute to the vision. Q: You are a multi-talented personality: a doctor, a Bharatanatyam dancer, a

So far, I have done whatever I could as an individual. Now I wish to strive for collective efforts. I wish to be a voice of youth on local to international platforms, and advocate for major environmental and humanitarian issues.

Yoga keeps me active, so I can take up any challenge that may come my way, and

yoga trainer, a model, and a philanthropist. How do you manage your time?

It isn’t easy to manage all the activities – there needs to be a point of balance and a stable mind. I believe yoga and meditation have played a very crucial role in shaping me to become what I am today. Yoga keeps me active, so I can take up any challenge that may come my way, and meditation helps me have a balanced mind, realize my potential, and stay calm even in stressful situations. Photography by RAJESH MENON

meditation helps me have a balanced mind, realize my potential, and stay calm even in stressful situations. Ju n e 2 02 2

71


Creativity


Yoga and creativity are both about expansion and stretch. JILL BADONSKY

Illustration by CHRISTIAN MACKETANZ


A N A R T E S S AY

Patience and Observation CHRISTIAN MACKETANZ explains the creative process behind the paintings in his exhibition.


CRE ATI VI T Y

T

he content of my paintings has always been our human traits. The best human qualities are found as well as our basest weaknesses; simply everything that affects us both externally and internally. The people in my pictures are making honest efforts, often in spite of enormous obstacles, so I truly feel for them.


CR E AT I VI T Y

76

H eart f u l n es s


CRE ATI VI T Y

Sometimes their strivings are so grotesque that it feels ridiculous. Even so, I’m not in a position to help them. It’s not up to me whether their efforts are successful or not. This lies in the eye, the mind, and especially the heart of the patient observer.

Ju n e 2 02 2

77


CR E AT I VI T Y

So, the fate of the people in my paintings is decided, and their story is created, by the viewer alone. Patience and looking closely are necessary … especially because these are not motion pictures. Painting has always been a means for me to go beyond the limits of knowing and understanding.

78

H eart f u l n es s


CRE ATI VI T Y

From the simplest graffiti to the most elaborate painting there is always someone behind it who has left the realm of thought, using a meager two-dimensional means of expression, who has put everything into that image. Again and again, I’m amazed at how modest the undertaking of painting can be. It requires only minimal materials, hardly any space, and no knowledge.

Illustrations by CHRISTIAN MACKETANZ

Ju n e 2 02 2

79


w hat' s u p

Master the habit of meditation The Heart-In-Tune app offers daily practices to awaken the potential for a joyful existence. Download app at heartintune.org

HEARTSAPP

MEDITAT ION MA S T ER CLA S S

3 masterclasses In these online masterclasses, you will learn the practical benefits of meditation and other yogic practices. Masterclasses are available online each day after you sign up and accessible throughout the day. Each class runs between 35 and 45 minutes.

Log in to your heart. Meditate with a trainer. Observe. Transform.

heartfulness.org/ masterclass

Download at heartsapp.org info@heartsapp.org

80

H eart f u l n es s

Post graduate diploma in advanced yoga. Learn to teach the eight limbs of yoga. Merge the traditional art of yoga with a modern professional approach. D EGR EE IN OM Heartfulness Yoga

Teacher Training Course

heartfulness.org/yoga/


F IND YOU R COMMU NIT Y

Find a trainer or meditation center near you!

#1 B EST SEL L ER

heartfulness.org/en/ connect-with-us/ #1 BE S TS E L L E R

DESIGNING DESTINY by DAAJI

THE HEARTFULNESS WAY by DAAJI

How meditative practices lead to changes in lifestyle, both personal and in relationships, which lead to greater freedom in designing our destiny.

In this inspiring text, you will discover a special collection of meditations that awaken the depths of human potential and initiate a mystical inner journey. In this process, the heart becomes a perennial source of wisdom and guidance to help you navigate life’s twists and turns and lead a life more connected to yourself and others.

Available at designingdestiny.com, on Amazon, and at all leading bookstores. designingdestiny.com

Available through heartfulnessway.com, at major bookstores and on Amazon.

for life C O N S CIO U S L I V I N G IN S TOCK

HFNLife strives to bring products to make your life simple and convenient.

YOU -NIV ER S IT Y

Meditation & The Evolution of Consciousness In this video series, you'll learn tools for living a happy and fulfilling life. A Heartfulness and Udemy Video Series. Register today.

We do our tiny bit to fulfill your material needs by bringing you a set of curated partners in apparel, accessories, eye-care, home staples, organic foods and more. The affiliation of our partner organizations with Heartfulness Institute helps in financially sustaining the programs which we conduct in various places across the world. hfnlife.com

daaji.org/udemy

Ju n e 2 02 2

81





Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.