JOY FEELINGS MAGAZINE by JOWD FOUNDATION

JOY FEELINGS! W

How shoes were invented and how to make them!

Fun Christmas recipes! Fun holiday vac in Iceland!

The Best Gospel Musicians Of All Time Inside!

Best 2015 movies and books to read!

2015 Nobel chemistry winners! Khloe moves on!

THE BEST WEDDING PLANNER!

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JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

BEAUTY: How to stay young and beautiful forever…! LOVE AND SEX: How older people can still enjoy sex and healthy sex for women / Timeless pieces of advice about love and relationships JOY HEALTH: Treating liver disease early FASHION FEVER: The best celebrity fashion 2015/best winter fashions 2015 2015 NOBEL CHEMISTRY WINNERS FINE LIVING: Endless Christmas recipes to make it memorable BEST GOSPEL MUSICIANS OF ALL TIME: Mary Mary/Sandra Faye/Michael w Smith/ Shirley Ann Caesar-Williams SHORT STORIES: A good man is hard to find by Flannery O'connor/ The snows of kilimanjaro by Ernest Hemingway POEM: A visit from St. Nicholas by clement Clarke Moore BOOK REVIEWS: BEST OF MILLS AND BOON 2015,make it a love read! THE BEST MOVIES OF 2015: vacation, mission impossible, straight outta Compton,trainwreck,the phonecall… ENTERTAINMENT: GOSSIP,NEWS POLITICAL MAINSTREAM: what Russia wants in Syria/ The trouble with turkey: Erdogan, Isis, and the kurds by Michael j. totten. How lipstick was invented How shoes were invented and how to make them yourself JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

How the computer was invented and Charles Babbage’s role.

GERMAN COUNTRY MUSICIAN LOVES JOY FEELINGS MAGAZINE! Jens shared his passion for his fans and music!

CHRISTMAS RECIPES CHRISTMAS BREAKFAST JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

TOTAL TIME: Prep: 10 min. cook: 30 min. MAKES: 8-10 servings

INGREDIENTS

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8 eggs 2 cups eggnog 1/4 cup sugar 1/2 teaspoon vanilla or rum extract 20 to 26 slices English muffin bread Confectioners' sugar, optional

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Maple syrup

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DIRECTIONS 1. In a bowl, beat eggs, eggnog, sugar and extract; soak bread for 2 minutes per side. Cook on a greased hot griddle until golden brown on both sides and cooked through. Dust with confectioners' sugar if desired. Serve with syrup. Yield: 8-10 servings.

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Maple Roast Turkey and Gravy

"A New England style turkey with maple syrup. It makes for a mellow Thanksgiving dinner. Try stuffing it with Cranberry, Sausage and Apple Stuffing. If fresh marjoram is unavailable, 2 teaspoons of dried marjoram may be substituted." INGREDIENTS 4 h 30 m20 servings584 cals ď&#x201A;ˇ

2 cups apple cider JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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1/3 cup real maple syrup 2 tablespoons chopped fresh thyme 2 tablespoons chopped fresh marjoram 2 1/2 teaspoons grated lemon zest 3/4 cup butter salt and ground black pepper to taste 14 pounds whole turkey, neck and giblets reserved 2 cups chopped onion 1 cup chopped celery 1 cup coarsely chopped carrots 2 cups chicken stock 3 tablespoons all-purpose flour 1 teaspoon chopped fresh thyme 1 bay leaf 2 tablespoons apple brandy (optional) Add all ingredients to list

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DIRECTIONS

1. Boil apple cider and maple syrup in a heavy saucepan over medium-high heat until reduced to 1/2 cup (about 20 minutes). Remove from heat and mix in 1/2 of the thyme and marjoram and all of the lemon zest. Add the butter, and whisk until melted. Add salt and ground pepper to taste. Cover and refrigerate until cold (syrup can be made up to 2 days ahead). 2. Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). Place oven rack in the lowest third of oven. 3. Wash and dry turkey, and place in a large roasting pan. Slide hand under skin of the breast to loosen. Rub 1/2 cup of the maple butter mix under the breast skin. If planning on stuffing turkey, do so now. Rub 1/4 cup of the maple butter mixture over the outside of the turkey. With kitchen string, tie legs of turkey together loosely. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

4. Arrange the chopped onion, chopped celery, and chopped carrot around the turkey in the roasting pan. If desired, the neck and giblets may be added to the vegetables. Sprinkle the remaining thyme and marjoram over the vegetables, and pour the chicken stock into the pan. 5. Roast turkey 30 minutes in the preheated oven. Reduce oven temperature to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C), and cover turkey loosely with foil. Continue to roast, about 3 to 4 hours unstuffed or 4 to 5 hours stuffed, until the internal temperature of the thigh reaches 180 degrees F (80 degrees C) and stuffing reaches 165 degrees F (75 degrees C). Transfer turkey to a platter, and cover with foil. Reserve pan mixture for gravy. Allow turkey to sit about 25 minutes before removing stuffing and carving. 6. To Make Gravy: Strain pan juices into a measuring cup. Spoon fat from juices. Add enough chicken stock to make 3 cups. Transfer liquid to a heavy saucepan and bring to a boil. In a small bowl, mix reserved maple butter mixture with flour to form a paste, and whisk into the broth. Stir in thyme, bay leaf, and apple brandy. Boil until reduced and slightly thickened. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

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ITALIAN CHRISTMAS PUDDING CAKE

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INGREDIENTS SWITCH TO CUP MEASURES approx. 625 grams panettone (or pandoro) 6 tablespoons tuaca liqueur 2 large eggs (at room temperature) 75 grams caster sugar 500 grams mascarpone cheese (at room temperature) 250 ml double cream (at room temperature) 125 ml marsala 75 grams marrons glacés (pieces) 125 grams mini chocolate chips (or regular chocolate chips or finely chopped chocolate) JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

 

100 grams shelled pistachios (chopped) 2 tablespoons pomegranate seeds

ITALIAN CHRISTMAS CHRISTMAS DESSERT CHRISTMAS CAKE CHRISTMAS PUDDINGCHRISTMAS PARTY DESSERTS & SWEETS CAKE

METHOD 1. Using a serrated knife, cut the panettone roughly into 1cm / ½ inch slices, then use about a third of these to line the bottom of a 22 or 23cm / 9 inch springform cake tin. Tear off pieces to fit so that there are no gaps; panettone is fabulously soft and mouldable, so this isn’t a hard job. Drizzle 2 tablespoons of the Tuaca (or other liqueur of choice) over it so that the panettone lining is dampened. It looks like a beautiful golden patchwork made out of cake. 2. Now get on with the luscious filling. Whisk – using a freestanding electric mixer for ease – the eggs and sugar until very frothy and increased in volume and lightness. 3. More slowly, whisk in the mascarpone and double cream, then gradually whisk in the Marsala and carry on whisking until the mixture is thick and spreadable. Remove 250ml / a good cupful to a bowl or other container, cover and put in the fridge; this is for the top layer, which is not added until you serve the cake. 4. Crumble the marrons glacés into the big bowl of mascarpone cream mixture, followed by 100g / ¾ of the chocolate chips and JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

75g / ¾ of the chopped pistachios, and fold in. Use half of this creamy filling to top the panettone layer that is lining the cake tin. 5. Use another third (approx.) of the panettone slices to cover the cream filling, again leaving no holes for the cream to escape through. Dampen with another 2 tablespoons of liqueur. 6. Spoon on the other half of the cream mixture and spread it evenly. Then top with a third and final layer of panettone, covering the cream as before, and drizzle over it the last 2 tablespoons of liqueur. 7. Cover tightly with clingfilm, pressing down on the top a little, and put in the fridge overnight or for up to 2 days. 8. When you are ready to serve, take the cake out of the fridge, unmould and sit it on a flat plate or cake stand, then spread with the reserved mascarpone mixture. Don’t try to lift the cake off the base, as the panettone slices at the bottom are too delectably damp. 9. Scatter the top – and all around the cake, if wished – with the remaining chocolate chips and chopped pistachios and your pomegranate “jewels”. These sprinklings also provide beauteous camouflage for any less than aesthetically uplifting edges of the springform base which may be visible.

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SPICED AND SUPERJUICY ROAST TURKEY

INGREDIENTS SWITCH TO CUP MEASURES For the turkey brining

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approx. 6 litres water 1 large orange or 2 smaller (quartered) 250 grams maldon salt (or 125g / ½ cup table salt) 3 tablespoons black peppercorns 1 bouquet garni 1 cinnamon stick 1 tablespoon caraway seeds JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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4 cloves 2 tablespoons allspice berries 4 star anise 2 tablespoons white mustard seeds 200 grams sugar 2 onions (unpeeled and quartered) 1 x 6 cm piece of fresh root ginger (unpeeled and cut into 6 slices) 4 tablespoons maple syrup 4 tablespoons runny honey stalks from 1 bunch fresh parsley 1 x 5.5 kilograms turkey For the basting glaze 75 grams goose fat (or butter) 3 tablespoons maple syrup Method

1. Put the water into your largest cooking pot or a bucket or plastic bin. Squeeze the juice from the orange quarters into the water before you chuck the husks in, and then add all the other ingredients, stirring to combine the salt, sugar, syrup and runny honey. 2. Remove any string or trussing from the turkey, shake it free, remove the giblets, if not already done, and put them in the fridge (or straightaway set about making the stock for the gravy), then add the bird to the liquid, topping up with more water if it is not completely submerged. 3. Keep covered in a cold place, even outside overnight or for up to a day or two before you cook it, remembering to take it out of its liquid (and wipe it dry with kitchen paper) 1-2 hours before it has to go into the oven. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

4. Read the Important Note below, and preheat the oven to 200°C/gas mark 6/400ºF. 5. Melt the goose fat (or butter) and maple syrup together slowly over a low heat. Paint the turkey with the glaze before roasting in the oven, and baste periodically throughout the cooking time. 6. Roast for 2½ hours.When you think it’s ready, pierce the turkey with the point of a sharp knife where the body meets the leg, and if the juices run clear, it’s cooked; if still pink, cook it for longer until they run clear, or use a meat thermometer. 7. Then take the turkey out of the oven, and let it sit, tented with foil, for 20–40 minutes or even longer if you like, as I do. IMPORTANT NOTE:  Turkey cooking times tend to seem quite short if you are used to the "standard" formula for calculating cooking times for poultry. However we have all been overcooking turkeys for years and complaining how dry and sawdusty they are. The table below gives my suggested timings for turkey.   The timings in the table are for a free-range turkey - these tend to have more fat than a lean mass-produced bird and the marbling of fat in the free-range turkey tends to conduct the heat faster meaning that it cooks more quickly. It also assumes that the turkey has been allowed to come up to room temperature before cooking (take the turkey out of the fridge 1-2 hours before you want to cook it) and that the turkey has no stuffing and is not trussed. If you are stuffing your turkey, then you must weigh the already-stuffed bird, and cook according to the table below.   When the turkey has had its allotted time in the oven check that it is cooked by piercing the turkey with the point of a sharp knife where the meat is thickest, behind the knee joint of the thigh, if the juices that run out are clear then the turkey is cooked. If they are still pink JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

then let the turkey have another 15-20 minutes in the oven and test again. You can also use an instant-read thermometer to check if the turkey is cooked - this will be at 74ºC/165ºF. When the turkey is ready, remove it from the oven, tent it with foil and let it rest for 30 to 60 minutes, out of a draught. If you are still nervous about turkey timings then we would also suggest that you consider brining your turkey as this will keep the bird moist even after longer cooking times. If you are brining your turkey then do cook your stuffing separately. We would like to mention that in the US the FDA recommends that turkeys are cooked to a minimum internal temperature of 165ºF.  Turkey cooking times - oven fully preheated to 200ºC/400ºF Weight of Bird Cooking Time 2.25kg/5lb 1 ½ hours 3.5kg/8lb 1 ¾ hours 4.5kg/10lb 2 hours 5.5kg/12lb 2 ½ hours 6.75kg/15lb 2 ¾ hours 7.5kg/17lb 3 hours 9kg/20lb 3 ½ hours 11.5kg/25lb 4 ½ hours

DIY BRITISH BEEF CROSTINI

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INGREDIENTS         

750g piece of beef fillets, from the thin end 1 tbsp olive oil 1 tsp English mustard powder 300ml tub crème fraîche 2 tbsp snipped chives 1 heaped tsp creamed horseradish 250g Stilton 70g bag rocket leaf 1 baguette, sliced diagonally METHOD

1. Heat oven to 20)C/180C fan/gas 6. Rub the beef with the oil and mustard, then season. Heat a non-stick frying pan over a medium-high heat. Sear the beef for 2 mins each side and place in the oven for 10 mins for rare and 12-15 mins for medium rare (you JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

may have to adjust timings if your piece of beef is especially thin or thick). Remove from the oven, cover with foil and leave to cool. 2. Mix together the crème fraîche, chives and horseradish in a small bowl and season to taste. Keep in the fridge until ready to serve. 3. Just before serving, arrange the beef on a chopping board with the Stilton, rocketand crème fraîche. Toast the bread and serve while still warm. Toast the bread and serve while still warm. Top the crostini with rocket, slices of beef, chunks of cheese and dollops of crème fraîche.

CHOCOLATE RASPBERRY PAVLOVA

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INGREDIENTS SWITCH TO CUP MEASURES

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for the chocolate meringue base 6 large egg whites 300 grams caster sugar 3 tablespoons cocoa powder (sieved) 1 teaspoon balsamic vinegar (or red wine vinegar) 50 grams dark chocolate (finely chopped) for the topping 500 ml double cream 500 grams raspberries 3 tablespoons dark chocolate (coarsely grated)

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METHOD 1. Preheat the oven to 180°C/gas mark 4/350ºF and line a baking tray with baking parchment. 2. Beat the egg whites until satiny peaks form, and then beat in the sugar a spoonful at a time until the meringue is stiff and shiny. Sprinkle over the cocoa and vinegar, and the chopped chocolate. Then gently fold everything until the cocoa is thoroughly mixed in. Mound on to a baking sheet in a fat circle approximately 23cm / 9 inches in diameter, smoothing the sides and top. Place in the oven, then immediately turn the temperature down to 150°C/gas mark 2/300ºF and cook for about one to one and a quarter hours. When it's ready it should look crisp around the edges and on the sides and be dry on top, but when you prod the centre you should feel the promise of squidginess beneath your fingers. Turn off the oven and open the door slightly, and let the chocolate meringue disc cool completely. 3. When you're ready to serve, invert on to a big, flat-bottomed plate. Whisk the cream till thick but still soft and pile it on top of the meringue, then scatter over the raspberries. Coarsely grate the chocolate so that you get curls rather than rubble, as you don't want the raspberries' luscious colour and form to be obscured, and sprinkle haphazardly over the top, letting some fall, as it will, on the plate's rim.

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12 THINGS INTERIOR DESIGNERS WOULDN'T WASTE THEIR MONEY ON NEXT TIME DON’T WASTE ON WHITE STATEMENT FURNITURE

GENERATE ART NO ONE REALLY LIKES

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DON’T WASTE ON DINNING CHAIR SLIP COVERS

A HIGH MAINTENENCE OUTDOOR SPACE

A MAJOR REMODEL WITH ILL CONCEIVED DETAILS

JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

ELABORATE CHILDREN’S FURNITURE

EXPENSIVE UPDATES ARE JUST TOO TRENDY

PIECES THAT THEY WEREN’T 110 PERCENT SURE WOULD FIT

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FURNITURE IN A COLOR BETTER SUITED FOR ACCENT PIECES

MASS PRODUCED FURNITURE FROM 50 YEARS AGO

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CUSTOM WINDOW TREATMENTS

JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

WOOD FLOORS IN HOMES WITH LARGE PETS

REDECORATE WITH PAINT

Refresh old furniture

Jump-start your decorating ideas with budget-friendly options for accent walls and accessories

To create a backdrop for lightcolored china and collectibles, paint the back of the cabinet a darker color than the frame. We love Benjamin Mooreâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Tropicana Cabana (2048-50).

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Highlight the unexpected A dose of lime green freshens the breakfast bar, shows off the

shapely bar stools, and links to green walls and cabinets elsewhere in the kitchen.

Add architectural interest Rev up style in a white-box room with a stripe of painted

color. Here, a wide pewter gray line mimics the look of molding.

Add a touch of whimsy Playful vertical stripes add personality and emphasize the

height of these cabinets, which serve as a room divider.

Play against type Inexpensive pegboard and paint become instant artwork when paired with a collection of tools.

We love the yin and yang of this girly bubblegum shade and rustic hardware.

Add drama Don’t be afraid of the dark―dark paint, that is. An accent wall in black (as shown here in G&R Paint Co.’s Black

Bear PPC-DT9), navy, or chocolate brown serves as a stunning backdrop for lightcolored furnishings and picture frames.

More color ideas For more expert help in restyling your home with paint, check out our book Design With Color (Oxmoor House;

$25). Its color-by-color and style guides are both practical and inspiring.

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GREAT HOLIDAY DESTINATION THIS SEASON! Christmas is a great time of year to venture north to discover your inner child amongst natural wonders. One of the most exciting winter trips is to Iceland where you have a great chance of glimpsing the Northern Lights. There is a lot more to see in Iceland, including glaciers, hot springs and geysers, volcanic craters, lava flows and waterfalls. Plus the capital Reykyavik is charming.

shaped by volcanoes, glaciers and tectonic plates slowly being pulled apart, Iceland holidays are an opportunity to see Mother Nature at her most incredible. This is a landscape

like no other. In winter youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find thundering waterfalls snap frozen, endless snow drifts to be skidooed across and the northern lights dancing across the night sky. But holidays here donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to be hard work. You can sip local schnapps while sat in the bubbling waters of a geothermal pool as the wind whips snow from the tips of volcanic carters around you. During summer slip between the sheets of the earth as you snorkel in the Silfa fissure, watch whales splash through the waves in the northern fjords, or drop into the Thrihnukagigur Volcano under the glow of the midnight sun. Holidays in Iceland are as dramatic as they are different JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

A Brief Encounter with Reykjavik It may be one of Europeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s smallest capitals, but it certainly puts many others to shame with its diversity of attractions. In close proximity are geysers, caves, hot springs and glaciers. The city centre proffers galleries, museums and sculptures which reflect

the huge variety and creative and cultural background of Icelandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s population of just 321,000. Buildings owe more to nature than to architects. The plethora of restaurants on offer pride themselves on crafting culinary delights from an abundance of locally sourced products.

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MICHAEL WHITAKER SMITH (born October 7, 1957) is an American musician, who has charted primarily in the contemporary Christian and occasionally in the mainstream charts. His biggest success in mainstream

music was in 1991 when "Place in this World" hit No. 6 on the Billboard Hot 100. Over the course of his career, he has sold more than 18 million albums.

Smith is a three-time Grammy Award winner, an Award recipient, and has earned 45 Dove Awards. In 1999, ASCAP awarded him with the "Golden Note" Award for lifetime achievement in songwriting, and in 2014 they honored him as the

"cornerstone of Christian music" for his significant influence on the genre. He also has recorded 31 No. 1 Hit songs, fourteen gold albums, and five platinum albums. He has also starred in two movies and published 13 books including This is Your Time, JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

which he worked with Christian author Gary Thomas to write. Michael Whitaker Smith was born to Paul and Barbara Smith in Kenova, West Virginia. His father was an oil refinery worker at the Ashland Oil Refinery, in nearby Catlettsburg, Kentucky. His mother was a caterer. He inherited his love of baseball from his father, who had played in the minor leagues. As a child, he developed a love of music through his church. He learned piano at an early age and sang in his church choir. At the age of 10, he had "an intense spiritual experience" that led to his becoming a devout Christian. "I wore this big cross around my neck," he would recall, "It was very real to me." He became involved in Bible study and found a group of older friends who shared his faith. After his older Christian friends moved away to college, Smith began to struggle with

feelings of loneliness and alienation. After graduating from high school, he gravitated toward alcohol and drugs. He attended Marshall University while developing his songwriting skills but dropped out after one semester. He also played with various local bands around Huntington, West Virginia. During that time, his friend Shane Keister, who worked as a session musician in Nashville, encouraged him to move to Nashville, the Country Music capital, and pursue a career in music. In 1978, Smith moved to Nashville, taking a job as a landscaper to support himself. He played with several local bands in the Nashville club scene. He also developed a problem with substance abuse. â&#x20AC;&#x153; I really started losing touch when I moved to Nashville, around April of '78. I was smokin' marijuana, drinking, doing some other drugs; JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

â&#x20AC;?

just being crazy, you know. My mom and dad knew what I was doing. But they never hassled me, they just prayed for me. And I felt convicted by God. Every time I'd wake up I knew: This isn't me. But I couldn't change myself. In November 1979, Smith suffered a breakdown that led to his recommitment to Jesus Christ. The next day he auditioned for a new contemporary Christian music (CCM) group, Higher Ground, as a keyboardist and got the job. His lead vocals were heard on much of CCM radio with

the single, "I Am". It was on his first tour with Higher Ground, playing mostly in churches, that Smith was finally able to put the drugs and alcohol behind him. In 1981, while he was playing keyboards for Higher Ground,[ Smith was signed as a writer to Meadowgreen Music, where he wrote numerous gospel hits penned for artists such as Sandi Patty, Kathy Troccoli, Bill Gaither and Amy Grant, to the effect that some of these popular worship songs can now be found in church hymnals. The following year, Smith began touring as a keyboardist for Grant on her Age to Age tour.

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He would eventually become Grant's opening act and recorded his first Grammynominated solo album The Michael W. Smith Project (which he also produced himself) in 1983 on the Reunion Records label. This album contained the first recording of his hit "Friends", which he co-wrote with his wife Deborah. By the time Smith's second album Michael W. Smith 2 was released in 1984, he was headlining his

own tours. In 1986, Smith released The Big Picture, produced by John Potoker.

Michael W. Smith and Toby Mac with evangelist Billy Graham in 1994.

he released Change Your World, which included the No. 1 adult contemporary hit "I Will Be Here for You". In 1993 Smith released his first box set,The Wonder Years and his first greatest hits album, The First Decade (1983â&#x20AC;&#x201C;1993). The latter also includes two new songs, "Do

In 1990, Smith released Go West Young Man, his first mainstream effort, which included the mainstream crossover hit single "Place in This World". The song peaked at No. 6 on the Billboard Hot 100. In 1992,

After the release of his 1988 effort, i 2 (EYE), Smith once again collaborated with Grant for her "Lead Me On World Tour". The following year, Smith recorded his first Christmas album, simply titled Christmas (1989).

You Dream Of Me?" and "Kentucky Rose". In 1995, Smith released his eighth album I'll Lead You Home, which combines the pop style of his secular albums with a touch of religious feel. Live the Life (1998) and This Is Your Time (1999) follow the same style. In 1998, Smith also released his second Christmas album, Christmastime.

Michael W. Smith during a concert in Bloomsburg, Pennsylvania in 2005. Smith won the Male Vocalist of the Year award at the GMA Music Awards in 2003. The same year he also released his second greatest hits album, The Second Decade (1993â&#x20AC;&#x201C;2003),

Smith collaborated with Jim Brickman on "Love of My Life", a romantic love song for Brickman's album Destiny in 1999. The song went to chart at No. 9 on the Hot Adult Contemporary Tracks. Also in 1999, he became the first Christian artist to receive the ASCAP "Golden Note" Award for lifetime achievement in songwriting.

which includes a new single called "Signs".

Smith's second instrumental album, Glory, was released on November 22, 2011. Unlike his JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

first instrumental album,Freedom (2000), this album features a 65-piece orchestra at AIR Studios Lyndhurts Hall in London and Wildwood Recording Studio in Nashville. Smith's concert in Draper, Utah, on July 24, 2012 was almost canceled due to a complaint filed by a Utah resident on July 16, 2012. He claimed that a show "conflated with prayer and worship" should remain in church or private property, not in "public's backyard". The following day the city council decided to cancel the concert, but a day later they decided to host the show as planned after all after a criticism from a Utah evangelical group that equated cancelling the concert to an assault on religious liberty. The Mayor of Draper and several city council members were present at the event and were recognized for their support. In 2014, Smith released three albums, Hymns, Sovereign, and The Spirit of

Christmas. Hymns is Smith's first effort at doing his own rendition of traditional hymns, and it was released exclusively at Cracker Barrel Old Country Store on March 24, 2014. The album sold 12,000 copies in its first week of release and debuted at No. 24 on the US Billboard 200. It was also the best-selling Christian music album for the week of April 19, 2014, and won 2014 Dove Award for "Inspirational Album of the Year". Sovereign, released on May 13, 2014, is his first studio worship album and his first album released through Capitol Records, after leaving his long-time label Reunion Records in 2013. The album sold almost 16,000 copies in its first week, and debuted at No. 10 on the Billboard 200, making it the highest charting album in his career as of 2014. The Spirit of Christmas, officially released as Michael W. Smith & Friends: The Spirit of Christmas, is Smith's first duet album. Released on September 30, 2014, it features duets JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

with Carrie Underwood, Lady Antebellum, Little Big Town,Jennifer Nettles, Martina McBride, Vince Gill, Bono, Amy Grant, and Michael McDonald. The album marks Smith's third new album in 2014 to enter the Billboard 200, peaking at No. 16 as of December 2014. Smith, along with Amy Grant, was honored as the "cornerstone of Christian music" by ASCAP in 2014 for his significant influence on the genre.

In 2015, Smith starred as Cliff McArdle in the movie adaptation of the best-selling book "90 Minutes in Heaven" by Don Piper. The movie is due for release in Fall 2015. Smith is married to Deborah "Debbie" Kay Davis (b. 1958) and has five children: Ryan Smith, Whitney Katherine Smith-Mooring (married to Jack Mooring of the

band Leeland), Tyler Michael (keyboard player for the United Tour), Anna Elizabeth, and Emily Allison. He resides in the Nashville suburbs and spends time at the Smith family farm. His son, Ryan Smith, is a filmmaker who directed the film After. Alderson-Broaddus College awarded Smith the degree Doctorate of Music honoris causa in 1992. Smith attended Belmont Church in Nashville, Tennessee and is mentored by its long time pastor, Don Finto. Smith is the founding pastor of New River Fellowship in Franklin, Tennessee, where he was the lead pastor from 2006 to 2008. Smith and his wife remain involved members of the church. Smith supports the Republican Party, and is personal friends with several prominent Republicans, including former President George W. Bush. He endorsed Sam Brownback's brief run for president in 2008. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

He was also named one of People magazine's "Most Beautiful People" in 1992.

MARY MARY is a Grammy Award-winning American contemporary gospel duo, consisting of sisters Erica AtkinsCampbell (born April 29, 1972) andTrecina "Tina" Atkins-Campbell (born May 1, 1974).

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The duo are often credited along with Kirk Franklin for broadening the fan base of urban contemporary gospel in the 2000s by introducing elements of soul music, hip hop, funk and jazz. Mary Mary broke onto the music scene with their popular song "Shackles (Praise

You)"â&#x20AC;&#x201D;which is considered one of the pioneering songs of urban contemporary gospel music. The group's name, as stated in an interview is inspired by the two famous Marys from the Bible; Mary, the mother of Jesus Christ, and Mary Magdalene.

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Their debut album, Thankful (2000), was certified Platinum. In addition, the duo has released two Gold albums: Incredible (2 002) and Mary Mary (2005), both of which have charted at

No. 1 on the Billboard Top Gospel Albums. They have also received four Grammys, among other awards. In 2011, they released their fifth studio album, Something Big.

In March 2012, they premiered their own television

series, Mary Mary, on WE tv. A second season premiered in

December 2012 and concluded in February 2013. Their most recently released album is their first compilation album, Go Get It (2012), with the hit single of the same name. Then the third season premieres on February 27.

The sisters were born Erica Monique Atkins and Trecina Evette Atkins in California. The Atkins sisters grew up as part of a large family of nine children in Inglewood, California.Their parents are mother Thomasina Atkins, an evangelist and choir director at the Evangelistic Church of God in Christ, and father Eddie A. Atkins, an Elder in the Church of God In Christ and Gang/Youth Counselor. Their mother and father were married and divorced three times when their father, Eddie, died in 2013.]

Due to their proximity in age, the two sisters grew up closer to one another than to any of their seven siblings. The Atkins children are: Darrell Atkins (born 1965; the only living boy, as a second boy died as a child); Maliea Atkins (born 1967); Erica and Tina (born 1972 and 1974); Delisa AtkinsBrown (born 1977); Thomasina Atkins (born 1979); Alana Atkins-Jamison (born 1985) and Shanta Atkins (born 1986). (Thomasina, Alana, Delisa and Shanta Atkins all sing background on Mary Mary albums and in stage performances.) The sisters quickly entered the world of church choirs, traveling gospel shows, and some television productions. All eight Atkins children were on the Bobby Jones Gospel show on BET. The sisters had their sights set on making music a career and enrolled at El Camino College to study voice. There they ran up against the divide between academic music JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

studies and the popular musical world. "We had to study classical and sing arias, which was fine," Erica told the Times, "but the teachers would tell us if we sang anything else it would damage our instrument". The sisters toured with the 1995 Michael Matthews traveling gospel show Mama I'm Sorry and Sneaky. Each sister subsequently toured as a backup singer for a variety of R&B acts, including Brandy.

A meeting with producer Warryn Campbell led to their song publishing deal with the giant EMI music conglomerate and a series of songs that landed on movie soundtracks. They wrote "Dance" and performed it with Robin S. for the soundtrack to the 1998 film Dr. Dolittle; they performed "Let Go, Let God" for The Prince of Egypt. Several of their songs were recorded by 702. The sisters' profile in the gospel

industry was raised when their songs "Time To Change" and "Yeah" were recorded by Yolanda Adams on Mountain High... Valley Low. At the same time, Mary Mary as a musical entity took shape. They have won multiple awards, including three Grammys. On December 23, 2010, Mary Mary along with Bebe & Cece Winans featuring the West Angeles Church of God in Christ Choir performed on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. From 2007 to 2012, the Campbells both served as judges for a gospel music competition show on BET called Sunday Best, along with CeCe and Bebe Winans.

The duo was subsequently signed to Columbia Records/C2 Records and decided to perform under the name Mary Mary, honoring Mary, the mother of JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

Jesus and Mary Magdalene.They were the first gospel act to record for the industry giant Columbia Records since Tramaine Hawkins in the mid-1990s. Their first single, "Shackles (Praise You)" became a crossover hit, being popular with gospel, R&B, and pop audiences. It was a Top 5 R&B and Top 10 pop hit, and peaked at No. 28 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart. It became the first gospel song in five years to crack the R&B top ten and gained wide exposure on the MTV video cable channel. The album was a huge success because it offered a younger, hipper version of gospel that audiences could relate to. Their debut album, Thankful was released in May 2000. It peaked at No. 1 on the Gospel album chart and at No. 59 of the overall Top 200 chart, and was certified Platinum for shipments of one million copies in the USA. It went on to win the Grammy Award for Best Contemporary Soul Gospel Album. The second

single "I Sings" features rapper BB Jay. Both singles were also hits in the UK and Europe, and to this day remain popular with Christian youths in the US, Latin America, and Europe. Their only Top 10 UK hit to date is "Shackles (Praise You)", which reached No. 5 in the UK Singles Chart in June 2000. The follow-up "I Sings" peaked at UK No. 32.

With their second album Incredible, the duo was able to maintain their success. Soon after its July 2002 release it was No. 1 on the Gospel chart and was able to enter the Top 20 of the Top 200 album chart. Incredible was later on certified Gold for 500,000 copies sold in the United States. The album's singles were In The Morning and I Try. While this album charted higher than their debut, sales were lower. The duo attributed the lower sales to less aggressive promotion due to JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

label switchovers and the advent of music piracy. After taking time off to have children, Mary Mary released their self-titled third album, Mary Mary, in July 2005. It became the duo's first album to enter the Top 10 on Billboard and was later on certified Gold for sales of 500,000 copies. The first single "Heaven" contained a sample from seventies soul trio the Honey Cone's "Want Ads". Heaven made history and broke chart records as it had an unprecedented nine week run as the No. 1 record on Billboard's Gospel Radio chart. The second single, "The Real Party (Trevon's Birthday)" debuted at No. 43 on the Gospel Radio Chart. The third single, "Yesterday", also became a hit, especially on the Adult R&B charts where it peaked at No. 10. On the R&B/Hip Hop chart, the song became their second biggest hit since "Shackles" in 2000, reaching the No. 50. The

album's final single, "Believer" indicated testimonies of being a Christian. The song hit No. 33 on the Gospel Radio chart. On October 10, 2006, the duo released their fourth studio album, a Christmas project entitled A Mary Mary Christmas.

On October 21, 2008, the recording group released their fifth studio album, The Sound. The lead single "Get Up" was released digitally via iTunes on July 15, 2008. The Sound saw Mary Mary achieve even greater success in the mainstream market; the album sold over 37,000 copies in its first week, and was their best charting album to date, debuting No. 7 on the Billboard, No. 2 on the US R&B chart, and topping the gospel and CCM charts. The album held the No. 1 position on the Billboard Gospel Album chart for over six months since its release. Warryn Campbell JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

again returned to produce the album and saw collaborations with Kierra Sheard, David Banner, Marvin Winans, Daryl Coley, Andrae Crouch, Rance Allen,Dorinda Clark Cole, Joe Ligon, Walter Hawkins, Tramaine Hawkins, and Karen Clark Sheard. In Spring 2009 "God In Me" began achieving crossover success (as Shackles had nine years earlier), reaching No. 5 on the Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs, and No. 1 on the Hot Dance Club Play. The duo (along with Warryn Campbell) was nominated as songwriters at the 52nd Grammy Awards in the Best Gospel Song category for "God in Me" while the Israel Houghton song they were featured on "Every Prayer" was also nominated. They went on to win the award. After the awards, they were invited to participate in the remake of We Are The World to benefit Haiti after the earthquake. The album also

won Mary Mary four Stellar Awards on January 16, 2010.

In 2009, Mary Mary commenced recording their sixth studio album. Originally titled OMG, the project was renamed Something after R&B singer Usher had a hit single, "OMG" in 2010. The album was released on March 29, 2011. The duo released the lead single, "Walking," in the fall of 2010. A video was shot in January 2011 in Santa Ana, CA. Mary Mary debuted the title track "Something Big" on the BET Celebration of Gospel 2011, while "Something Bigger" served as a B-side to "Walking". The second single from the album was "Survive." The video debuted on July 27, 2011.

On February 13, 2012, Mary Mary debuted their new single, "Go Get It", from the greatest JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

hits compilation album of the same name, at the Orpheum Theater in Los Angeles, California. A music video was also made for the single and released on April 20, 2012. The performance was shown in the season finale of their reality TV series, Mary Mary (on WEtv), which began airing March 29, 2012. The album was officially released on May 8, 2012. It features one other new track, "Sunday Morning", along with eleven remixed and remastered hits from their previous albums. In efforts to promoting "Go Get It," Mary Mary has announced a "Go Get It Tour." The tour is in 10 different cities across the U.S, beginning in Jacksonville, FL on October 25 and running through November 17 in Hampton, VA. Support acts include: Isaac Carree, VaShawn Mitchell, Anthony Brown & Group TherAPy, Sundayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Best Finalist Jessica Reedy and Anita Wilson. On December 5, 2012, it was revealed that they scored a

double Grammy nomination under the categories of Best Gospel/Contemporary Music Performance and Best Gospel Song, for "Go Get It"; the latter winning the Grammy.

Both sisters are married to men who happen to have the same last name â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Campbell. In 2000, Tina married Teddy Campbell, who is the drummer for American Idol. He has a daughter, Cierra, from a previous relationship. Together they have five children. Their daughter Laiah Simone Campbell was born on September 9, 2003. Second daughter Meela Jane Campbell was born on June 11, 2007. On October 20, 2009, their son Glendon Theodore II, Tj, was born. Tina gave birth to a son, Santana Campbell, on August 4, 2012. Erica married their record producer Warryn Campbell on May 26, 2001. Their wedding was documented on the TLC JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

show,A Wedding Story. On September 13, 2004, Erica gave birth to their first child, Krista Nicole Campbell. On April 24, 2010, she gave birth to the couple's second child, Warryn Campbell III. On Tuesday July 19, 2011, Erica announced on Good Morning America that she was pregnant with the couple's third child, due February 12. She gave birth to a girl named Zaya Monique Campbell on January 24, 2012. In 2014, Warryn and Erica Campbell were called by God to start a local Bible study program in Los Angeles California. The following year Warryn was ordained as a pastor and later the couple founded the California Worship Center that started on Easter Sunday 2015.

The Worship Center meets in North Hollywood, California.

SHIRLEY ANN CAESARWILLIAMS, known professionally as Shirley Caesar (born October 13, 1938, Durham, North Carolina), is an American Gospel musicsinger, songwriter and recording artist whose career has spanned over six decades. A multi-award winning artist, with eleven Grammy Awards and seven Dove Awards to her credit, she is known as the "First Lady of Gospel Music".

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Beginning recording at the age of 13 in 1951, Shirley Caesar has released over forty albums. She has participated in over 16 compilations and three gospel musicals, Mama I Want to Sing, Sing: Mama 2 and Born to sing: Mama 3. Her credits also include a series of commercials for MCI Communications and several awards for her recordings. She has won or received 11 Grammy Awards, 13 Stellar Awards, 18 Doves, 1 RIAA gold certification, an Essence Award, McDonald's Golden Circle Lifetime Achievement Award, NAACP Achievement Award, SESAC Lifetime Achievement Award, as well as induction into the Gospel

Music Hall of Fame. According to Soundscan, she has sold 2.2 million albums since 1991. She has made several notable appearances, including the televised Live from Disney World Night of Joy, the Gospel According to VH1, a White House performance for George Bush, and a speech on the Evolution of Gospel Music to the US Treasury Department.

Caesar first began singing and performing for family and friends. She first recorded in 1949, at age 11. Her professional adult 'career' began when she was 20, when

she approached Albertina Walker about joining The Caravans, one of the most popular gospel groups at that time. She sang with Albertina Walker, Cassietta George, Dorothy Norwood, Inez Andrews, Delores Washington and James Cleveland while in the Caravans. She recorded and performed with the Caravans from 1958 until 1966. Thereafter she began pursuing a solo career with two albums, entitled My Testimony and I'll Go, backed up by the Institutional Radio Choir. She made a name for herself in the gospel music circuit, making guest appearances on the Bobby Jones gospel show and other popular television shows. Caesar credits Albertina Walker as her mentor and "Queen of Gospel Music". Between 1981 and 1995, she received seven Dove Awards for Black Gospel Album of the Year for Live at the

G.M.W.A.,Celebration, Christ masing, Sailinâ&#x20AC;&#x2DC;, Live ... In Chicago, Go and Rejoice. She received two Black Gospel Song of the Year Awards for "He's Working It Out for You" and "Hold My Mule". She has performed with such performers as Patti Labelle, Whitney, Dorothy Norwood, Faith Evans, Dottie Peoples, Arnold Houston, Kim Burrell, John P. Kee, Kirk Franklin and Tonex, Tye Tribbett among others. Shirley Caesar is also an actress. She acted in Fighting Temptations with Beyonce Knowles and Cuba Gooding Jr. Caesar was inducted into the North Carolina Music Hall of Fame in 2010.

Shirley Caesar graduated from Shaw University with a Bachelor of Science degree in Business Administration in 1984. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

She also spent time studying at the Divinity School of Duke University and has received

honorary doctorates from Shaw University and Southeastern University.

Caesar pastors the 1,500member Mount Calvary Word of Faith Church in Raleigh, North Carolina, with her husband, Bishop Harold I. Williams (deceased). She is a member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority and had been married

to her husband Bishop Harold Williams since 1983. Bishop Harold Williams died on July 4, 2014. "I never dreamed the Lord would bring my ministry to where it is, and I feel that I have not yet reached the zenith because we've got such

wonderful things planned!" She cites her mother as a strong influence in her decision to give so selflessly of herself. The pastor has committed a sizable portion of all concert sales to her outreach ministries. She continues to deliver weekly sermons and also leads an annual outreach ministries

conference. She notes, "I cannot sweeten the Atlantic Ocean, but I can take a pitcher out of the ocean and sweeten that."

SANDRA FAYE "SANDI" PATTY (born July 12, 1956) is an American Christian music singer, known for her

wide vocal range and expressive flexibility which has led music critics to dub her "The Voice".

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Patty was born in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, into a family of musicians; her father was a minister of music, and her mother served as the church pianist. She first performed at the age of two when she sang "Jesus Loves Me" for her church, Phoenix First Church of God (Anderson, Indiana). First growing up in Phoenix, then San Diego, she and her brothers joined their parents in a performing group known as "The Ron Patty Family", and sang at churches across the nation during summer holidays. After graduating from Crawford High School in

San Diego, she attended San Diego State University and Anderson University in Anderson, Indian a, where she studied voice and conducting. While studying at Anderson University, she worked as a studio musician for area recording studios, singing background vocals and recording commercial jingles, including one for Juicy Fruit gum. Her reputation as a performer and studio singer grew during the late 1970s, and it was during this time that she initiated contact with legendary Christian musician Bill Gaither.

Patty recorded her first album, For My Friends, an independent effort, that landed in the hands of executives at Singspiration! records. In 1979, she was signed to Singspiration! and released her first professional record, Sandi's Song. According to the FAQ section on her website, the name on her birth certificate is Sandra Patty. A printer's error on the labeling listed her name as Sandi Patti, and she used this moniker as her stage name for the next fifteen years, before correcting it to Sandi Patty. Patty's career expanded after she won her first two GMA Dove Awards in 1982 and

began singing backup for Bill Gaitherand the Bill Gaither Trio. She headlined her first national tour in 1984 and reached national acclaim after her rendition of "The StarSpangled Banner" was included during the ABC Statue of Liberty rededication broadcast on July 6, 1986. This exposure led to multiple mainstream television appearances including The Tonight Show, Christmas in Washington, Walt Disney's Fourth of July Extravaganza, and the 1998 Pepsi 400. She was invited to sing the national anthem at theIndianapolis 500 in 1987â&#x20AC;&#x201C;88, 1990â&#x20AC;&#x201C;92, and once again in 2013.

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At the peak of her career, Patty's concerts were so heavily attended that she performed in often sold-out mainstream arenas and concert halls. In the late 1980s and early 1990s, she averaged over 200 concerts a year, and supported a staff of over 30 that managed her career. In 1995, she was also featured in

the Warren Chaney docudrama, America: A Call to Greatness.[ During this period of time Patty was noted, often critically, as the highest-paid singer in the Christian music industry averaging over $100,000 per appearance, largely due to massive touring and highprofile public appearances.

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In 1992, the news of Patty's divorce from manager John Helvering shocked the gospel music industry. The reason for the split was later revealed to be infidelity which subsequently stalled her career in the mid 1990s. During her marriage, it was later reported that Patty had an extramarital affair with her back up singer, Don Peslis, who was also married at the time. Patty divorced Helvering in 1993 and married Peslis in August 1995. Confronted with rumors of the affair just two weeks into her marriage with Peslis, Patty made a full confession to her church congregation.

Patty slowly rebuilt her career by expanding her musical appeal which included pop concert performances with symphony orchestras including the New York Symphony Orchestra, Boston Symphony Orchestra, Prague Symphony Orchestra,London Symphony

Orchestra, Atlanta Symphony Orchestra, the Cincinnati Pops, and the Dallas Symphony as well as headlining and hosting the Yuletide Celebration with the Indianapolis Symphony Orchestra in 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007, 2010, 2013, under the direction of Maestro Jack Everly. She is scheduled to host the 30th annual Yuletide Celebration in December 2015. In both interviews and in her autobiography, Broken on the Back Row, Patty expressed remorse and took full responsibility for her past actions and revealed the steps she took in seeking the forgiveness from those that her actions most affected. In 2000, Patty had a guest singing appearance at the end of a 7th Heaven episode (season four, episode 20). She appeared in the 2006 annual Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade in New York. A televised performance of Sandi Patty's Yuletide Special was filmed for syndication in 2006, JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

with other performers— including the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and theU.S. Air Force Reserve Band. In 2004, Patty was inducted into the Gospel Music Hall of Fame and in 2007 was awarded the GMA Music in the RockiesSummit Award. In May 2008, Patty released her 30th studio recording, Songs for the Journey, in which she covers classic hymns of the church and other modern gospel classics. 2008 also saw the release of five separate compilation recordings of past songs taken from previous albums. In 2009, Patty received two GMA Dove Award nominations: Female Vocalist of the Year, and Inspirational Album of the Year (Songs for the Journey). Simply Sandi, an acoustic album, is the first solo project to be released on her own record label, Stylos Records (a label with three artists— Sandi, Ben Utecht, and Heather Payne). It was released on May

5, 2009. This album includes new renditions of some of Sandi's most beloved songs including "In Heaven's Eyes", "Via Dolorosa" and "The Stage is Bare".WEA Distribution is the distributor for Stylos Records, although this album is not being released commercially. In Fall 2009, Patti released her first live Christmas album entitled Christmas: LIVE. The album includes live performances of her past Christmas favorites including "O Holy Night", "Someday", and a duet with her husband Don Peslis in "The Prayer".

In Fall 2010, The Edge of the Divine was released. The album featured the new version of Patty's popular song "We Shall Behold Him", previously released in 2004 on "Hymns of Faith...Songs of Inspiration" plus eight new songs with a fresh contemporary sound— JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

one of which she performs with Heather Payne. A book of the same name was also releasedâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;with the sub-title "Where Possibility Meets God's Faithfulness." In October 2011, Patty released Broadway Stories, a secular album. From iTunes Review: "Before Sandi Patty was a Christian music star, she developed her craft by performing stage standards and pop tunes from the Great American Songbook. Broadway Stories reaffirms her mastery of such material against gorgeous backdrops provided by the 64-piece Prague Symphony Orchestra. From the first track to the last, Patty shows an easy command of the Broadway idiom, applying her formidable pipes to material worthy of her talents." In January, 2012, Patty starred as Dolly Levi in the Indianapolis Symphony Orchestra's world premiere concert stage version of the

Broadway musical, "Hello, Dolly!" to rave reviews. In 2012 and 2013, Patty was a judge and mentor for the Songbook Academy, a summer intensive for high school students operated by the Great American Songbook Foundation and founded by Michael Feinstein. In December 2015, Patty will serve as host (for the seventh time) at the month-long 30th annual Yuletide Celebration with the Indianapolis Symphony Orchestra.

In September 2015, Patty announced that she will retire from touring following an extensive 90+ city tour, titled 'The Forever Grateful Tour,' starting in February 2016 and running through mid-2017. A new studio album of the same name is slated to be released in early 2016.

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TRAINWRECK

Having thought that monogamy was never possible, a commitmentphobic career woman may have to face her fears when she meets a good guy.

Director: Judd Apatow Writer: Amy Schumer Stars: Amy Schumer, Bill Hader, Brie Larson ANT-MAN Armed with a super-suit with the astonishing ability to shrink in scale but increase in strength, cat burglar Scott Lang must embrace his inner hero and help his mentor, Dr. Hank Pym, plan and pull off a heist that will save the world. Director: Peyton Reed Writers: Edgar Wright (screenplay), Joe Cornish(screenplay), 7 more credits Âť Stars: Paul Rudd, Michael Douglas, Corey Stoll |

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MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE - ROGUE NATION Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) returns for yet another top-secret assignment as hot property screenwriter Drew Pearce (Iron Man 3, Pacific Rim) takes over writing duties for the fifth installment of the phenomenally successful spy franchise.

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Ethan and team take on their most impossible mission yet, eradicating the Syndicate - an International rogue organization as highly skilled as they are, committed to destroying the IMF. Director: Christopher McQuarrie Writers: Christopher McQuarrie (screenplay), Christopher McQuarrie (story), 2 more credits Âť Stars: Tom Cruise, Rebecca Ferguson, Jeremy Renner

VACATION Rusty Griswold takes his own family on a road trip to "Walley World" in order to spice things up with his wife and reconnect with his sons. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

Directors: John Francis Daley, Jonathan M. Goldstein Writers: Jonathan M. Goldstein, John Francis Daley, 1 more credit Âť Stars: Ed Helms, Christina Applegate, Skyler Gisondo

STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON The group NWA emerges from the mean streets of Compton in Los Angeles, California, in the mid-1980s and revolutionizes Hip Hop culture with their music and tales about life in the hood. Director: F. Gary Gray Writers:

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Jonathan Herman (screenplay), Andrea Berloff(screenplay), 3 more credits Âť Stars: O'Shea Jackson Jr., Corey Hawkins, Jason Mitchell

THE PHONE CALL The Phone Call is a 2013 British short drama film directed by Mat Kirkby. It won the Academy Award for Best Live Action Short Film at the 87th Academy Awards.

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The film stars Sally Hawkins as Heather, a crisis hotline counsellor trying to dissuade Stanley (Jim Broadbent), a distraught caller, from a suicide attempt following the death of his wife.

BOYHOOD

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Boyhood is a 2014 American independent comingof-age drama film, written and directed by Richard Linklater, and starring Patricia Arquette, Ellar Coltrane, Lorelei Linklater, and Ethan Hawke. Shot intermittently from 2002 to 2013, Boyhood depicts the childhood and adolescence of Mason Evans, Jr. (Coltrane) from ages six to eighteen as he grows up in Texas with divorced parents (Arquette and Hawke). Richard Linklater's daughter Lorelei plays Mason's sister, Samantha.

Production began in 2002 and finished in 2014, with Linklater's goal to make a film about growing up. The project began without a completed script, with only basic plot points and the ending written initially. Linklater developed the script throughout production, writing the next year's portion of the film after rewatching the previous year's footage. He incorporated changes he saw in each actor into the script, while also allowing all major actors to participate in the writing process by incorporating their JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

life experiences into their characters' stories. Boyhood premiered at the 2014 Sundance Film Festival and was released theatrically on July 11, 2014. The film also competed in the main competition section of the 64th Berlin International Film Festival, where Linklater won the Silver Bear for Best Director.The film was nominated for five Golden

Globe Awards, winning Best Motion Picture â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Drama, Best Director, and Best Supporting Actress for Arquette. It also received six Academy nominations including Best Picture, Best Director, and Best Supporting Actress for Arquette, which she won.

WHIPLASH

Whiplash is a 2014 American drama film written and directed by Damien Chazelle based on his experiences in the Princeton High School Studio Band. Starring Miles Teller and J. K. Simmons, the film depicts the relationship between an ambitious jazz

student (Teller) and an abusive instructor (Simmons). Paul Reiser and Melissa Benoist costar as the student's father and love interest respectively. The film opened in limited release domestically in the US and Canada on October 10, 2014, gradually expanding to over 500 screens and finally closing JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

after 24 weeks on March 26, 2015. Over this time the film grossed $33 million, against a production budget of $3.3 million. Whiplash premiered in competition in the US Dramatic Category at the 2014 Sundance Film Festival on January 16, 2014, as the DHEEPAN

festival's opening film Sony Pictures Worldwide acquired the international distribution rights. At the87th Academy Awards, Whiplash won Best Film Editing, Best Sound Mixing, and Best Supporting Actor for Simmons, and was nominated for Best Adapted Screenplay and Best Picture.

Dheepan is a 2015 French drama film directed by Jacques Audiard. The film

was partly inspired by Montesquieu's Persian Letters. Featuring novelist, and JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

former Tamil Tiger child soldier, Antonythasan Jesuthasan in the lead role, the film tells the story of three Tamil refugees who flee the civil war-ravaged Sri Lanka and come to France, in the hope of reconstructing their lives. The film won the Palme

d'Or at the 2015 Cannes Film Festival. It has been selected to be shown in the Special Presentations section of the2015 Toronto International Film Festival.

BIRDMAN

Birdman: or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance), commonly known as Birdman, is a 2014 American satirical black comedy-drama film directed by Alejandro G. Iñárritu. It was written by Iñárritu, Nicolás Giacobone, Alexander Dinelaris Jr. and Armando Bo. The film stars Michael Keaton with a supporting cast of Zach Galifianakis, Edward

Norton, Andrea Riseborough,Amy Ryan, Emma Stone and Naomi Watts. The story follows Riggan Thomson (Keaton), a faded Hollywood actor best known for playing the superhero "Birdman", as he struggles to mount a Broadway adaptation of a short story by Raymond Carver. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

The film covers the period of previews leading to the play's opening, and appears as if filmed in a single shot, an idea IĂąĂĄrritu had from the film's conception. Emmanuel Lubezki, who won the Academy Award for his cinematography in Birdman, believed that the recording time necessary for the unique long take approach taken in Birdman could not have been made with older technology. The film was shot in New York City during the spring of 2013 with a budget of $16.5 million jointly financed by Fox Searchlight Pictures, New Regency Pictures and Worldview Entertainment. It premiered the following year in August where it opened the 71st Venice International Film Festival.

Birdman had a limited theatrical release in the United States on October 17, 2014, followed by a wide release on November 14, grossing more than $103 million worldwide. The film won the Academy Award for Best Picture, along with Best Director, Best Original Screenplay, and Best Cinematography from a total of nine nominations, tying it with The Grand Budapest Hotel for the most nominated film of the Academy's 87th annual awards ceremony. It also won Outstanding Cast in a Motion Picture at the 21st Screen Actors Guild Awards, as well as Best Actor in a Musical or Comedy for Keaton and Best Screenplay at the 72nd Golden Globe Awards.

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THE GREEK TYCOON'S BLACKMAILED MISTRESS

He wants her in his bed – but will she stay there…? Aristandros Xenakis is like a panther poised to pounce. Sleek, dark and utterly

powerful, soon he’ll taste the sweet victory of revenge… Ella desperately wants access to her baby niece, but the child’s guardian is Aristandros JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

– her ex-fiancé! She’s no choice but to submit to his demand – she must become his mistress! Naïve and unworldly, Ella is not like the groomed, gold-

digging females who have previously warmed Aristandros’s bed. Surely it’s only a matter of time before he tires of her…?

BEDDED FOR PLEASURE, PURCHASED FOR PREGNANCY

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Step into a world of sophistication and glamour, where sinfully seductive heroes await you in luxurious international locations. Bought for a million dollars… When Zarios D’Amilo meets Emma Hayes again, she is no longer the clumsy teenager who tried to kiss him, but a beautiful, confident woman. Now he wants her!

Claimed for convenience… To claim his inheritance, this Italian playboy must curb his wild ways. He needs a convenient fiancée, and Emma needs a million dollars. So Zarios seizes his opportunity – he will have her! But passion soon leads to pregnancy. Suddenly, the stakes are higher…

THE MILLIONAIRE'S MISBEHAVING MISTRESS

Top of the tycoon’s agenda! As Dallas’ most eligible bachelor, and heir to the family fortune, billionaire Will Harrison knows how to handle the paparazzi – but his little sister Evie is a worry… Miss Behaviour etiquette expert Gwen Sawyer has only

three weeks to work her magic on Evie before a society ball – and is moved into Will’s luxurious penthouse. However, she discovers too late that etiquette is the last thing on devilishly handsome Will’s mind…

NAUGHTY NIGHTS IN THE MILLIONAIRE'S MANSION

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Hot-shot in the boardroom – blazing in the bedroom! Dynamic and drop-dead gorgeous, in two weeks’ time Sydney millionaire Mitch Stuart will be president of his family’s empire – and he won’t allow himself any distractions… Enter Vanessa Craig! Vanessa’s working hard to

keep her little business afloat, although she can’t help but care more about the pets in her store than pennies in the bank. Mitch steps in to help her in the only way he knows: financially. But Vanessa’s bewitching kisses threaten his hard-andfast corporate rule: not to mix business with pleasure…

THE PREGNANCY SHOCK JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

The convenient bride…with a shocking secret When his PA asked for extended leave, Greek billionaire Alexei Drakos was extremely inconvenienced. He relied on Billie Foster for everything – running his life, even getting rid of his girlfriends. Little did Alexei know that Billie had left to have his baby!

night and he had no idea she was pregnant! With Billie gone, there was something missing in Alexei’s glittering existence. When she returned, he needed to offer her something special to make her stay…like a wedding ring of convenience…? The Drakos Baby PART ONE: THE PREGNANCY SHOCK Look out for A Stormy Greek Marriage, part two of The Drakos Baby, next month.

In fact, he didn’t even remember their passionate THE DUKE'S CINDERELLA BRIDE

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From plain Jane to society bride! Brooding Hawk St Claire, Duke of Stourbridge, believes Jane Smith to be a mere servant girl – albeit a remarkably attractive one! So when genteel Miss Jane is wrongly turned out of her home for inappropriate behaviour following their encounter, the Duke takes her in as his ward.

A STORMY GREEK MARRIAGE

Although Hawk is the first man to make Jane’s pulse race, she knows she cannot risk falling for his devastating charm. A marriage between them would be forbidden – especially if he were to discover the shameful truth about her… The Notorious St Claires

A marriage full of secrets – stormy, sexy and set to implode? Billie’s wedding day should have been the happiest of her life. She was marrying the father of her baby…her secret baby. But tycoon Alexei Drakos had suffered amnesia, so he had no recollection of the incredible night he’d spent with Billie a year ago… Tonight he was expecting his new bride to be a virgin…

Billie knew that a marriage laced with hidden surprises was not likely to last. If only for their son’s sake, she had to convince Alexei of the truth…starting tonight in the honeymoon bed… The Drakos Baby Rip-roaring passion, revelations and the reunion of a lifetime!

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THE VIRGIN SECRETARY'S IMPOSSIBLE BOSS

By Carole Mortimer Linus Harrison's masculine aura is a little too much for his sensible, bespectacled PA Andrea. He makes her heart beat quite erratically! And the last thing Andi expects is to have to spend a weekend alone with her wild, irrepressible boss. . .

Billionaire Linus loves a challenge, and relishes the chance to undo Miss Prim and Proper's buttoned-up exterior. It only takes one snowbound Scottish night to ignite the flames of the devilishly handsome businessman's desire. . . With sparks flying, how can Andi resist?

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FALCO: THE DARK GUARDIAN

Duty – or desire? Revered businessman Falco Orsini has left life in the Special Forces behind – though he uses his powerful skills occasionally, when duty calls. But duty is always on Falco’s terms! When his estranged father asks him to protect a young model who is being stalked, he begrudgingly agrees…only because of the

vulnerability he can see in her eyes. Elle Bissette won’t be a victim – she can take care of herself! And surely big, dark, devilish Falco is dangerous? Because one kiss from a man like him will leave her breathless… The Orsini Brothers Darkly handsome – proud and arrogant The perfect Sicilian husbands! JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

IN THE TYCOON'S DEBT

Runaway bride – back in his bed! Fearsome tycoon Quinn McCain is in no hurry for revenge. He’ll take it when the time is right. The last time he saw his wife she was hastily signing the annulment papers. Now she’s arrived in his office – begging for help and ripe for

his revenge! Nervous Evie can turn to no one – except the man she humiliated when her ruthless father forced her to end her marriage. But there’s a price on Quinn’s help…the wedding night he’s long been denied!

RUTHLESS MAGNATE, CONVENIENT WIFE

Billionaire in need… Sergei Antonovich, a Russian billionaire, was famous for being knee-deep in stunning supermodels and aspiring actresses. But not one was suitable bride material. Would he ever grant his ageing babushka her dearest wish and present her with a grandchild? Of a bride and a baby… So,

why not handle this challenge as business? Without emotion, but with a contract of convenience that granted him the perfect deal: a wife he’d bed, wed, get pregnant…and then discard… Pregnant Brides Inexperienced and expecting, they’re forced to marry!

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PLAYING THE GREEK'S GAME

Can he turn defiance into desire? Drakon Lyonedes has it all: power, wealth, sex appeal…and any woman he wants! Until the beautiful Gemini Bartholomew steps into his life, that is… Confronting him over his plan to turn her family home into a hotel, Gemini intrigues Drakon.

The problem? Long-term just isn’t in this infamously arrogant tycoon’s vocabulary – and Gemini is a virgin who surely wants more than one night of sizzling, scorching passion…? She’s determined to defy him, but whose willpower will prove the strongest?

Victoria's Secret model Candice Swanepoel and Hermann Modern and fun, Viva La Juicy is an iconic fragrance that has been wildly successful since

CANDICE SWANEPOEL was born on October 20, 1988 in Mooi River, KwaZulu-Natal, South Africa. She is known for her work on Victoria's Secret Fashion Show (2014), The Victoria's Secret Fashion

Nicoli are engaged, a source close to the model confirms to PEOPLE. 2008. Candice Swanepoel is the new face.

Show (2011) and The Victoria's Secret Fashion Show (2009).

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Trade Mark (2) Long blonde hair and light blue eyes Her waist-to-hip ratio Trivia (15) The first South-African model to walk in the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. Discovered in a mall in Durban, by a model scout, when she was 16 years old. She can make up to R40000 (5000 Euros) a day.

Does a lot of work in fashion, mostly swimwear and lingerie. Speaks English and Afrikaans. Ranked #20 in the 2011 Ask Men top 99 "most desirable women" list. Has dated model Hermann Nicolai since 2006. Ranked #6 in the Top Sexist Models list by models.com. Ranked #28 Sexiest Woman in the world by the Spanish version of DT magazine.

Ranked #62 in the 2011 FHM list of "100 Sexiest Women in the World". Cousin to actresses Minka McConaughey and Mila McConaughey. Voted #10 on Ask men's top 99 'most desirable' celebrity women of 2012. Ranked #11 on Askmen's list of the top 99 "most desirable" famous women of 2013. Ranked #1 on Maxim's "Hot 100" of 2014 list. Engaged to Brazilian model Hermann Nicoli. Personal Quotes (4) [on her favorite fashion designers] My favorite designers are Chloe, D&G, Christian Louboutin and Marc Jacobs. I change my style from day to day, so I have many favorites.

[on her weight loss speculation]: I am healthy and happy. I'm heartened to know how much everyone cares about me, but in this case everything is normal and good. I was a ballet dancer growing up and that's what I was convinced I would be. I was very skinny, braces; so I never thought I would be a model. I grew in a farm in South Africa and I was scouted there and they sent me to Europe. It's kind of been blessed, since then it happened all so fast.

ACTRESS SHAILENE WOODLEY was born in Simi Valley, California, to Lori (Victor), a middle school counselor, and Lonnie Woodley, a school principal. She has one brother, Tanner.

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She was educated at Simi Valley High School in California. When Woodley was four years old she began commercial modeling. Acting roles followed, and she made her screen debut in 1999's Replacing Dad (1999). More parts followed in The District (2000), The O.C. (2003) and Crossing Jordan (2001), amongst others. When Woodley was 15, she was diagnosed with Idiopathic

Scoliosis and wore a chest-tohips plastic brace for two years, which proved a successful treatment. In 2008 Woodley was cast in the lead role of Amy Juergens in The Secret Life of the American Teenager (2008) and in 2011 she had her big screen breakthrough when she appeared in Alexander Payne's The Descendants (2011),

opposite George Clooney. Her performance in the role of Alexandra King brought critical acclaim and recognition by the movie industry. She won an Independent Spirit Award and the 2012 MTV Movie Awards Breakthrough

Performance Award, as well as a Golden Globe nomination.

She had a very varied upbringing. She started her education at La MartiniĂ¨re Girls College in Lucknow as a resident student; a short stay at Maria Goretti College in

Bareilly prepared her for further studies in the USA. Having completed

PRIYANKA CHOPRA was born 18th July 1982 to the family of Capt. Dr. Ashok Chopra and Dr. Madhu Chopra.

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EMILY BLUNT WILL STAR IN THE GIRL ON THE

TRAIN ADAPTATION

Juan Emily Blunt attends 'Sicario' photocall during 63rd San Sebastian Film Festival on September 19, 2015 in San Sebastian, Spain. (Photo by Juan Naharro Gimenez/WireImage)

The film is based on Paula Hawkins' bestselling book A film adaptation of bestselling mystery, The Girl on the Train, will hit theaters Oct. 6, 2016. Emily Bluntâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;who is currently garnering Oscar buzz for her turn as an FBI agent fighting a JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

Mexican drug cartel in Sicario—will star as a woman who believes that she witnessed a crime take place in a house from her train window.

in talks to join, according to Variety.

Paula Hawkins’ novel was compared to Gone Girl when it hit shelves last winter. She told TIME that though there are similarities between the two stories, she was more inspired by a favorite filmmaker than another author. “It’s flattering to be compared to Gone Girl because I think Gone Girl is a great book. I actually think that atmosphere of the book is closer to Hitchcock,” she said. “But I suppose both books have a very flawed female protagonist at their heart and are women who maybe are not what they seem.”

7 THINGS YOU MAY NOT KNOW ABOUT PHARRELL WILLIAMS

Rebecca Ferguson, who broke out as a spy who could even kick Tom Cruise’s butt in this summer’s Mission: Impossible — Rogue Nation, has also signed on to the film. And Jared Leto and Chris Evans are

Pharrell Williams has had one hell of a career. Fresh off a flight from Europe, P made his way to Town Hall in NYC to have a live-streamed conversation with New York University professor and NPR host Jason King in a room full of NYU students. He was recently named NYU Tisch School of the Arts 2015 ArtistIn-Residence, a role that celebrates and honors outstanding individuals in their field. The point of this conversation was to kick off the celebration of the art school’s 50th anniversary and the plan was to go in-depth with Pharrell’s JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

work. While it’s easy to recognize his career highs and lows (because most of us have lived through them), the live conversation gave his admirers a look at a rarely seen side of Skateboard P. Most of the stories he shared, fans have heard in other interviews. But it was his reactions to the statements that stood out. It also has to do with him in 2015 looking back at his earliest beginnings. A lot happens in 20-something years.

voicemails, but the shyness he gets from hearing his own musical works in public. During the interview, King tried to play The Neptunesproduced “Superthug” when Pharrell stopped him. “Listening to my own music, it makes me shy.” The crowd gave a collective “awwwww,” but it wasn’t enough for Pharrell to get away without listening to his music on stage, even if he did cover his face the entire time.

Here are some of the conversation's highlights:

Brazil inspired Kelis' “Milkshake.”

Pharrell suffers from an extreme case of “voicemail syndrome.”

Sometimes inspiration comes from unlikely places. But being inspired by a country like Brazil sounds completely plausible, especially if it’s to write and produce a single like Kelis’ 2003 single, “Milkshake.” The story goes, Pharrell was in Brazil surrounded by beautiful women and a type of music that he compared to as “booty shakin’ music in Portuguese.” It inspired him to create a

According to Pharrell, “voicemail syndrome” is when you hate listening to yourself on voicemail. The words “voicemail syndrome” were said so matter-of-factly that I could’ve sworn it was an actual syndrome with millions of think pieces written on the subject. It wasn’t. In this case, Pharrell isn’t talking about

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certain feeling. The I’m going to dance all night without judgement feeling. Using Middle Eastern sounds, he made a beat that was different enough from what he heard, but familiar enough that Brazilians would still embrace it. Success. He’s the “Mr. Magoo of Music.” Mr. Magoo, a cartoon character from the '60s, is an old man that trouble always found because he couldn’t see. Magoo never got hurt and always came out in one piece. Pharrell kept bringing up the “Mr. Magoo Theory,” calling himself the “Mr. Magoo of Music.” Every time he goes out to look for something, it doesn’t work out. When it comes to him, it does. It isn’t always trouble that comes looking for Pharrell, but he’s made the opportunities that come his way work. “Frontin’” was meant for Prince.

He sent the song over to Prince hoping to get him on the track, but unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on if you like the outcome) never heard back from the singer, because #Prince. Something was missing with the single, and when Hov got on the track, it all became clear. “It was missing Jay Z.” And all was right in the world. This also turned into a chance for Pharrell to flex his falsettos. He considers himself a producer, before he considers himself an artist. It wasn’t until Daft Punk asked him to sing on their Random Access Memories singles in 2012 that Pharrell started to consider himself an artist. This entire time, he’s considered himself lucky enough to be the producer that had the opportunity to sing on his songs. “I’m still considering myself as this producer guy who is getting opportunities,” he revealed. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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Skateboard P is on the Hillary train.

The secret to success? Have fun and be different.

At one point in the interview, Pharrell caught himself sounding like a robot aka “like Donald Trump.” P knows that anything he says will be on social media at the blink of an eye, so he quickly clarified that he’s not Trump, but Hillary. “It’s time for a woman,” he said. Earlier this month, Pharrell and Ellen DeGeneres were discussing the upcoming Presidential election on her show when Pharrell said, “It’s time for a woman to be in there.” As a man, his reason for wanting a woman in office makes 100% sense. He went on to say, “Women think about things in a holistic way; it’s not so individual. The thing is, if we had somebody looking after our country that thought about things as a whole, I just feel like it just would be different.”

A student went up to the mic to ask P for advice on making pop music with a commercial mindset. “I would not advise trying to sound like you’re in the Hot 100… Have fun in your difference. Pumice your difference as much as you can to make it shine,” Pharrell said. In other words, have fun with it and be unique. When he was talking about his musical beginnings with Chad Hugo, he made sure to emphasize that they didn’t know what they were doing. “Just have fun. That’s where it usually ends up being cool.”

PRINCE HARRY MEETS BARACK OBAMA TO LAUNCH THE INVICTUS GAMES AT THE WHITE HOUSE

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Prince Harry has met with Barack Obama as he launched the Invictus Games in America. The royal met the President of the United States for the first time in the Oval Office of the White House during a flying visit this afternoon. At the meeting, Harry shook hands and chatted with President Obama before giving an impassioned speech calling for military veterans to

receive help, without being judged, for "invisible injuries" like post-traumatic stress. Harry's comments came during a visit with Michelle Obama and Jill Biden, the wife of US vice-president Joe Biden, to a military centre providing care and rehab for wounded US veterans. The trio's trip to the USO (United Service Organisations) Warrior and Family Centre at

Fort Belvoir in Virginia highlighted the efforts by America to support their wounded veterans.

"We have to help them all to get the support they need, without fear of being judged or discriminated against."

Speaking during the visit Harry said: "One thing we have to talk about more is breaking down these barriers around socalled invisible injuries, like post-traumatic stress, just as we have for physical injuries like the loss of a limb."

The prince's upcoming Invictus Games, a Paralympic-style championship for injured military personnel from across the globe, will be staged in Orlando, Florida, in 2016. It aims to challenge servicemen and women, many with serious injuries and disabilities, to strive for sporting excellence.

Harry added: "People from all walks of life struggle with issues like post-traumatic stress, anxiety, and depression, not just veterans.

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During his informal chat with Mr Obama that lasted around 30 minutes the two men discussed the Games.

"There is very little that can truly prepare you for the reality of war. The experiences can be stark and long lasting.

In his speech delivered at the military base Harry also spoke about the profound effect fighting in Afghanistan has had on his life. Harry said: "I am in no doubt that my two deployments to Afghanistan changed the direction of my life.

"Returning to the UK after my first deployment, I shared the flight home with three critically injured British soldiers, all in induced comas, and the body of a Danish soldier, killed in action. "It hit me then that this flight was one of many, carrying home men and women whose

lives would be changed forever, and some who had ANTHONY DOERR, BOWDOIN GRADUATE, WINS MAINE READERS’ CHOICE AWARD

The Pulitzer Prize-winning 'All the Light We Cannot See' is voted 2015's best.

Pulitzer Prize winner and Bowdoin College graduate Anthony Doerr added another honor, capturing the Maine booksellers, literacy advocates, reviewers and writers. From a field of 125, they selected “Euphoria” by Lily King, who lives in Yarmouth; “Redeployment” by Phil Klay; and Doerr’s “All the Light We Cannot See.” Doerr, who lives in Idaho, won the 2015 Pulitzer for fiction for

made the ultimate sacrifice. Readers’ Choice Award for his novel “All the Light We Cannot See.” The award was announced Monday at the Northeastern Maine Library District Fall Council Program. The Maine State Library and the Maine Library Association established the award in 2013. To qualify, books must be published in the United States in the previous year, appeal to a wide audience and be judged as exceptional. The committee includes 20 librarians,

“All the Light We Cannot See.” Maine readers voted online in September, encouraged by reading groups in libraries across Maine. Doerr wrote about a blind French girl and a German boy who meet in occupied France in World War II. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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‘FIFTY SHADES DARKER’ UPDATE: E.L. JAMES TEASES SHE’S ‘WORKING’ ON ‘FIFTY SHADES OF GREY’ SEQUEL

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E.L. James is back to work on her highly anticipated movie "Fifty Shades Darker." The film, a sequel to "Fifty Shades

of Grey," will continue to tell the love story of Anastasia Steele (Dakota Johnson) and her dominant, BDSM-obsessed

boyfriend, Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan). On Thursday, James posted a photo to her Instagram page of what appears to be Michael De Luca's office nameplate, writing in the caption, "#working." De Luca and Dana Brunetti produced "Fifty Shades of Grey” alongside James. Both men are expected to return for the second installment. It's been rumored for months the film was experiencing delays. Director Sam TaylorJohnson, who worked on the first movie, previously announced she wasn't going to return for the sequel but said she wished James and the second installment "nothing but success." When "Fifty Shades of Grey" was still filming it was reported that there was tension on set between Taylor-Johnson and James. Besides Taylor-Johnson leaving, "Fifty Shades of Grey" also lost its screenwriter, Kelly Marcel. According to Us

Weekly, she was replaced by novelist James' husband, Niall Leonard, as the new writer, while "House of Cards" director James Foley has been tapped to direct "Fifty Shades Darker." In September, Dakota Johnson opened up about the change of director, saying she was initially scared after TaylorJohnson left. “There was a moment of being afraid because I didn’t know what it was going to be like,” Johnson told Empire. “I had an experience with Sam and then it all went away.” However, the 26-year-old actress said she's excited to have Foley on board. "I think James is a talented filmmaker," she said. "How often do you get to reconvene with the same people and have a different spin?” While fans are anxiously waiting for "Fifty Shades Darker," they have been tossing around names they'd like to see in the sequel. One JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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fan favorite contender is Henry Cavill as Jake Hyde, Anastasia's boss. Brunetti, however, dismissed the speculation, telling E! Online last month they are "nowhere near casting." He added, "We haven't gotten into anything like that." "Fifty Shades Darker" is expected to hit theaters Feb. 10, 2017, followed by a third

Although Williams, 34, was recently linked to Drake, a second source says it was simply a “flirty friendship.”

installment, "Fifty Shades Freed," on Feb. 9, 2018.

IT’S A MATCH! SERENA WILLIAMS IS DATING REDDIT COFOUNDER ALEXIS OHANIAN. “THEY MET AT A LUNCH,” A SOURCE REVEALS IN THE NEW ISSUE OF US WEEKLY. “IT’S NEW.”

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Angeles School of Gymnastics on Saturday, Oct. 24. Says an onlooker, “He called her babe and they held hands.” Ohanian has even been getting into her sport of choice. Says the source, “He said he’d never been into tennis until they started dating!” Williams lost her bid for the first Grand Slam in tennis in 27 years on Friday, Sept. 11, to Roberta Vinci. The tennis star’s fans were quick to take to the Internet to point fingers at her then-rumored boyfriend, Drake, 29, for her defeat. The rapper had been rooting for Williams from the stands.

KHLOÉ KARDASHIAN AND LAMAR ODOM CALLED OFF THEIR DIVORCE IN LIGHT OF HIS HEALTH CRISIS, BUT SHE SAYS THEY ARE NOT BACK TOGETHER. “There are too many other important things, too many medical things,” she told People magazine in her first interview since Odom’s Oct. 13 hospitalization. “It’s not even in our brains thinking about us as a couple or having a relationship right now.”

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The Keeping Up With the Kardashians star, who reportedly ended her relationship with another NBA-er, James Harden, to devote her time to helping Odom recover, continued, “I loved him always, and I will always love him. I don’t

believe love is fickle. I believe when you love someone, you are allowed to love from afar. You don’t have to be with that person in order to love him." Khloé, 31, opened up to the magazine about what ran through her mind when her

estranged husband, whom she was in the process of divorcing, was found unconscious, foaming at the mouth, and bleeding from the nose at a Nevada brothel. "All I knew was I had to get there,” she told the mag. “I had to get to him and make sure he was okay. I hate that he was in that situation. I wouldn’t want anybody in that situation, especially someone I love and care about." While each day brings new, often dreary headlines about Odom’s health — including that he may need a kidney transplant — the blonde is hopeful that he will make a full recovery. "The fact that he woke up was definitely a sigh of relief for everybody,” said Khloé, who has remained by his side throughout most of the ordeal except to attend her big sister Kim’s baby shower and to get a hair makeover. “Every hour is different. It goes up and it goes down but he’s awake.

He’s alive and that’s all I wanted, was for him to be okay." It’s been rumored that Khloé has laid down the law to him, telling him absolutely no more drug use or she’s out of there. However, her approach sounds much more loving. "There is a very long road ahead of [Lamar],” she said. “He has to walk that road by himself, and, most importantly, he has to want to walk that road. I will be there supporting him every step of the way.” It sounds very Khloé. That’s why she’s the favorite Kardashian sister.

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The world's richest man is officially a sexagenarian. Microsoft founder Bill Gates turned 60 on October 28. Among the thousands of birthday wishes the business magnate and philanthropist received, this one from wife Melinda has got to be the most special. In a Facebook post, Melinda recounted her first ever date

with her future husband. "When Bill first asked me out, he said, 'I was thinking maybe we could go out two weeks from tonight,'" she wrote on the social networking site. When she complained that he wasn't spontaneous enough, Bill Gates did the sweetest thing possible. "He called me an hour later to suggest we get together that night. He asked: 'Is that

spontaneous enough for you?'" she said. Awww... isn't that just adorable? In her special birthday post, she also listed all the things that make Mr Gates the most incredible person. "Bill, after two amazing decades together, your humor, drive, intelligence, curiosity, thoughtfulness, optimism - and,

Not even the early afternoon rain dampened the spirits of his Ugandan fans. Over 30,000 fans cheered on relentlessly as

yes, your spontaneity - are as wonderful as ever," she said on Facebook, adding, "On land, at sea, and everywhere in between, I'm glad you're by my side." Here's wishing you a very happy (slightly belated) birthday, Bill Gates.

NEYO IN KAMPALA

the American Superstar belted out his most of popular hits like So Sick, she knows and of course Miss Independent.

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The American Superstar who has been the trending topic for over two months in Uganda's entertainment circles gave his fans a show to remember. In fact, the Bell Pop'n Jam concert

according to pundits can only be compared to the massive UB40 concert that also took place at the same venue back in 2008.

LEBRON RAYMONE JAMES

25,000 career points during the Cleveland Cavaliers' 107100 win against the 76ers.

CLEVELAND, Ohio -- The city of Philadelphia and LeBron James' teammates had a front row seat to witness history on Monday night. James scored 22 points on 9of-19 shooting, becoming the youngest player to reach

His final two baskets were both alley-oops, a reminder of his incredible athleticism that has helped him evolve into the game's best player. Following the game, Kevin Love expressed his appreciation for James, even using a goat emoji to

apparently show that Love feels James is the greatest of all time. Love wasn't the only one. Mo Williams, who was once critical of James' departure from Cleveland in the summer of 2010, put those hard feelings aside years ago. He chose to team up with James for the second time during the off-season and the duo has shown the same chemistry as the first go-around. Matthew Dellavedova, who scored 12 points off the bench, used an emoji of his own, giving the thumbs up and ending the tweet quoting James' familiar axiom, "Strive For Greatness."

Lebron Raymone James (born December 30, 1984) is an American professional basketball player who currently plays for the Cleveland of the National Basketball Association (NBA). He has started at the small forward and power forward positions.

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James has won two NBA championships (2012, 2013), four NBA Most Valuable Player Awards (2009, 2010, 2012, 201 3), two NBA Finals MVP Awards (2012, 2013), two Olympic gold medals (2008, 2012), an NBA scoring title (2008), and the NBA Rookie of the Year Award(2004). He has also been selected to 11 NBA AllStar teams, 11 All-NBA teams, and six All-Defensive teams, and is the Cavaliers' all-time leading scorer. James played high school basketball at St. Vincentâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;St. Mary High School in his hometown of Akron, Ohio, where he was highly promoted in the national media as a future NBA superstar. After graduating, he was selected with the first overall pick in the 2003 NBA draft by the Cavaliers. James led Cleveland to the franchise's first Finals appearance in 2007, losing to the San Antonio

Spurs. In 2010, he left the Cavaliers for the Miami Heat in a highly publicized ESPN special titled The Decision. James played four seasons for the Heat, reaching the Finals all four years and winning backto-back championships in 2012 and 2013. In 2013, he led Miami on a 27-game winning streak, the second longest in league history. Following his final season with the Heat, James opted out of his contract and re-joined the Cavaliers. Behind his leadership, Cleveland advanced to the Finals before losing to the Golden State Warriors. Off the court, James has accumulated considerable wealth and fame from numerous endorsement deals. His public life has been the subject of much scrutiny, and he has been ranked as one of America's most influential and popular athletes. He has been featured in books, documentaries, and television JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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commercials, and has hosted the ESPY Awards and Saturday Night Live.

While LeBron James is hoping to bring an NBA title back to Cleveland sooner rather than later, his wife, Savannah Brinson, is busy developing her own brand. Brinson, who’s been with James since the two were in high school, has interests in just about everything, ranging from her own Miami-based juice bar to a

charitable organization that helps Akron-area girls prep for prom.

It’s a busy way to live but, for the James family, it’s also the only way. After all, this is a group that is used to winning.

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THE MOST GLAMOUROUS TRENDY WINTER FASHION 2015!

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WHAT RUSSIA WANTS IN SYRIA(source;worldpoliticsreview.com)

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Russia began its military intervention in Syria a month ago, initially declaring that its aim was to take on the selfproclaimed Islamic State. But instead, it immediately started targeting groupsthat pose the most threat to Bashar alAssad’s regime, mainly the Islamist coalition of rebel and jihadi groups known as Jaish al-Fatah, or the Army of Conquest, which includes the Nusra Front, al-Qaida’s Syrian branch, as well as more moderate groups backed by Turkey, Saudi Arabia and even the United States. Russia hopes to consolidate the territory controlled by Assad’s forces, which have also launched an offensive on rebel groups affiliated with the Free Syrian Army that have been supplied with advanced antitank missiles by the CIA. It looks a little like a proxy war. Meanwhile, ahead of another round of talks on Syria’s future that now include Iran, the United States and its allies still insist that Assad has to go.

In the latest Global Dispatches podcast, host Mark Goldberg talks with Michael Kofman about the Syrian conflict, the impact of Russia’s intervention and Russia and the United States’ differing approaches toward Assad and the Islamic State.

Open and Shut: Sweden’s Identity Crisis Sweden, the biggest country at the heart of rich and peaceful Scandinavia, is in many ways in the eye of the current migration storm tearing through Europe. Although it is admitting fewer refugees than Germany in terms of sheer numbers, Sweden is—and has been for several years—the European Union’s (EU) biggest per capita recipient of refugees by quite a wide margin. In 2014, Sweden, a country with just 9 million inhabitants, received more than 80,000 asylum applications.

This year, that number is set to

grow substantially.

From one angle, no other country seems better equipped to handle this challenge. Having weathered fairly well both the recent economic crisis and a deeper transition to a globalized, European Unioninfused economy, Sweden remains at, or close to, the top of global tables of wealth and well-being. It might no longer be the quasi-socialist paradise that many people looked to— and flocked to—in the 1970s, but it is one of the few

European countries that still seems able to combine relatively solid growth, a strong welfare state and a genuine openness, both in economic terms and in immigration policy. Sweden is also already an “immigrant society”: At 16 percent, the proportion of its foreignborn population is higher than that of not only Germany and Great Britain, but also the U.S. In other words, Sweden is a country that should easily be JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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able to bear its share of the burden in the biggest global refugee crisis since World War II. ... THE TROUBLE WITH TURKEY: ERDOGAN, ISIS, AND THE KURDS BY MICHAEL J. TOTTEN

Turkey, a key member of NATO, has so far chosen to sit out the war against ISIS. Instead, it is at war with Kurdish militias in Syria, the only ground forces so far that have managed to take on ISIS and win.

Turkey fears and loathes Kurdish independence anywhere in the world more than it fears and loathes anything else. Kurdish independence in Syria, from Ankaraâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s point of view, could at a minimum escalate a threedecades-long conflict and at JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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worst threaten Turkey’s territorial integrity.

Assad’s before the rebellion broke out a few years ago.

Kurds make up between 15 and 25 percent of Turkey’s population, but no one knows for sure because the government outlaws ethnic classification. Most live in the southeast near the Syrian and Iraqi borders. Many would like to secede and form an independent state of their own.

ISIS is still the JV squad as far as Turkey is concerned, to use President Obama’s unfortunate formulation, but Kurdish armed forces have been trying to rip apart the country for decades and therefore Ankara has called in the varsity to deal with them.

They could conceivably do it with enough help from the outside. They have a model in the Kurds in Iraq, who liberated themselves from Saddam Hussein after the first Persian Gulf War and have been independent in all but name ever since. The civil war in Syria has allowed the Kurds there to carve out a space of their own between ISIS and the Assad regime, which is what worries the Turks. Turkey is a powerful state, but so was Saddam Hussein’s government. So was Bashar al-

Turkish nationalists insist everyone in their country is a Turk whether they like it and admit it or not. The Kurds, according to them, are not a separate people. Rather, they are “mountain Turks who lost their language.” But Turkish nationalism, like Arab nationalism, scarcely existed until the waning days of the Ottoman Empire, which expired at the end of World War I. And the truth is that Turkey, as the rump state of that multi-ethnic empire, is a mélange of different identities. With its Kurdish, Arab, Zaza, JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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and Alevi minorities, it’s no more homogeneous than the rump state of the Soviet empire with the Tatars, Ingush, Sakha, Chechens, and other large numbers of non-Russian peoples on its periphery. When Mustafa Kemal Ataturk founded the modern republic in the ashes of World War I, Turkish nationalists attempted to unite everybody under a single identity for the sake of national unity and to prevent any more territorial loss, but the Kurds refused to join up because the Western powers had promised them a state of their own. To this day, they remain the largest stateless people on earth. Many feel far more kinship with their fellow Kurds in Iran, Iraq, and Syria than with their nominal countrymen in Turkey. The Ottoman Empire was loosely confederated, with a space for the Kurds, but modern Turkey was founded as a strong Western-style republic with a powerful center, and the

Kurds were forcibly conquered, colonized, and integrated. The government’s response to Kurdish nationalism was tantamount to attempted cultural genocide. Ethnic Kurds were forcibly relocated from the eastern parts of the country, while European Turks were moved to the Kurdish region in the farthest reaches of Anatolia. Even speaking the Kurdish language was forbidden in schools, government offices, and in public places until 1991. Simply saying “I am a Kurd” in Kurdish was a crime, and it’s still considered scandalous in official settings. In 2009, a Kurdish politician created a huge controversy by speaking just a few words of Kurdish in the nation’s Parliament building. Despite the fervor of this repression, Turkey’s problem with its Kurdish minority is more political than ethnic. As Erik Meyersson at the JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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Stockholm School of Economics put it, “It is less an inherent dislike for Kurds that drives state repression of this minority than the state’s fear for the institutional consequences and loss of centralized power.”

once seen as a semi-plausible candidate for the European Union, yet the Kurdish parts of Iraq—one of the most dysfunctional and broken countries on earth—were and are doing much better than the Kurdish region of Turkey.

Beginning in 1984, the Kurdistan Workers’ Party, or PKK—initially backed by the Soviet Union—has waged an on-again, off-again guerrilla and terrorist war against the Turkish state that has killed more than 45,000 people, according to government figures. That’s almost as many as Americans killed during the Vietnam War.

From mid-2013 to mid-2015, the Turkish state and the PKK enjoyed a period of relative calm under a cease-fire, but in late July the army bombed PKK positions in northern Iraq, and the PKK in Turkey declared the cease-fire void. A wave of attacks against police stations swept over the country in August. An enduring peace between the two sides now seems as elusive as ever.

Most of the dead are Kurdish. The Turkish military dished out unspeakable punishment in the east of the country. Nine years ago, I drove from Istanbul to northern Iraq and was shocked to discover that Iraqi Kurdistan is a vastly more prosperous and pleasant place than bombed-out and repressed Turkish Kurdistan. Turkey was

The Turkish establishment has been alarmed by the existence of an autonomous Kurdish region in Iraq since the day it was founded and has repeatedly threatened to invade if it declares independence from Baghdad. (That may be the only reason the Iraqi Kurds haven’t yet done it.) And it’s JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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doubly alarmed now that the Kurds of Syria have cobbled together their own autonomous region, which they call Rojava, while the Arabs of Syria fight a devastating civil war with each other. And the Turkish establishment istriply alarmed because the Kurdish militias in Syria—the YPG, or People’s Protection Units—are aligned with the PKK. Turkey’s President Recep Tayyip Erdogan—like most of his ethnic Turkish countrymen—is terrified that an independent Syrian Kurdistan will help Turkish Kurdistan wage a revolutionary war against Ankara. Fairly or not, Erdogan sees Rojava much the way the Israelis see Hezbollah-occupied southern Lebanon. Ideally the Syrian Kurds wouldn’t side with the PKK. The PKK has committed crimes in Turkey and is a willing belligerent in a long and terrible war. The Turks are not imagining this or making it

up, and there is no shortage of Kurds elsewhere in the region who share Erdogan’s dim view of the PKK and its allies. “They are very fanatic in their nationalism,” Abdullah Mohtadi told me in Iraqi Kurdistan years ago. He’s the head of the Komala Party, a formerly Communist leftliberal Iranian Kurdish group living in exile in Iraq. “They are very undemocratic in nature. They have no principles, no friendship, no contracts, no values. In the name of the Kurdish movement, they eliminate everybody.” The United States, though, is backing the Syrian Kurds. We have to. They’re the only ground force capable of fighting ISIS and winning. The only other options in Syria are the repulsive Assad regime, Hezbollah, Sunni Islamists that will inevitably turn on the United States, the al-Qaeda– linked Nusra Front, and a handful of relatively moderate JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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but irrelevant Sunni groups that have already effectively lost. The Kurds are all that’s left. And the Kurds are the most pro-American people in the entire Middle East. They’re more pro-American than the Israelis. Ideologically, yes, the PKK-aligned groups are a bit iffy. They were once Soviet proxies and they’re at war with a member of NATO. But the Turks share at least half of the blame for that conflict. Nowhere in the region will Kurdish people accept cultural genocide lying down. Surely they would have accepted help from the United States had it been offered during the Cold War, but it wasn’t, so they took largesse and ideology from the Russians instead. For what it’s worth, though, the PKK is not what it used to be. The Soviet Union is dead, and a lot of the ideological Marxism its leaders once mouthed has been diluted over time to standard-issue leftism

with a culturally conservative twist. The Kurds of Turkey and Syria are not struggling for the collectivization of agriculture. They are not interested in liquidating landlords or “the kulaks.” They certainly aren’t interested in imposing a police state in Ankara. First and foremost, they’re fighting against the fascists of ISIS, and second for Kurdish independence, a secular system of government, and equality between men and women. They detest the Islamic religion as much as far-right “Islamophobes” in America. Compared with just about everyone else in the region, they’re liberals. Not in any alternate universe would the United States oppose these people right now. The Kurds of Iran and Iraq are more politically palatable, but you fight a proxy war with the proxies you have, and Americans will never find a better proxy in Syria against ISIS than the Kurdish People’s Protection Units. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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Turkey, however, sees everything differently. Early this summer, Erdogan was enraged when Kurdish forces in Syria liberated the town of Tel Abyad from ISIS, and the Turkish military drew up a plan to invade Syria, not to fight ISIS but to set up a 30kilometer-deep buffer zone to prevent the Syrian Kurds from controlling their own home country. “We will never allow the establishment of a state on our southern border in the north of Syria,” Erdogan said. “We will continue our fight in that respect whatever the cost may be.” Ponder the ramifications of that hard-line assertion for a moment. Our NATO ally was enraged because ISIS lost territory and says it’s willing to invade Syria, not to fight ISIS, but to suppress American allies.

American foreign policy makers and analysts have been arguing for years which is worse, the Syrian-IranianHezbollah axis or ISIS. Obviously they are both awful. ISIS is more likely to kill Americans at home and abroad, but Iran is the world’s biggest state sponsor of terrorism. In Turkey, however, the argument is over whether ISIS or the Kurds is the greater evil. Ankara doesn’t like ISIS. It has nothing in common with ISIS. But unlike the Kurds, ISIS hasn’t been at war with the Turkish government for the last 30 years. In that respect, ISIS is, from the Turks’ point of view, the lesser of two evils. “ISIS commanders told us to fear nothing at all [from Turkey],” a former ISIS communications technician told Newsweek, “because there was full cooperation with the Turks and they reassured us that nothing will happen . . . ISIS saw the Turkish army as its ally JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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especially when it came to attacking the Kurds in Syria. The Kurds were the common enemy for both ISIS and Turkey.” President Obama has complained that Turkey could do “more” to stop the influx of “militants” into Syria. Turkey certainly could! Turkey has a long border with Syria, but it’s sealed. I’ve driven alongside it. In some areas, there are minefields everywhere. Turkey has a world-class army—the second-largest in NATO—and could obliterate ISIS from the face of the earth if it wanted. If the Kurdish People’s Protection Units can make headway into ISIS-held territory with just a ragtag militia, Turkey could liberate the Syrian population from Assad, Hezbollah, and ISIS simultaneously. But for years Erdogan has been reluctant even to shore up that border.

“You should understand something,” a Turkish smuggler said to Jamie Dettmer of the Daily Beast. “It isn’t hard to cross into the caliphate [ISIS-held territory], but go further west or east into Kurdish territory, then it gets much harder to evade the Turkish military and cross the border. Even the birds can’t come from there; and our birds can’t go there.” Turkey is not Iraq. It is 1,000 years ahead of Iraq. It is a serious and capable nation, the opposite of incompetent. It’s not an accident or a coincidence that ISIS has been able to replenish its ranks over the Turkish border while the Kurds couldn’t. If Erdogan can stop Kurds from crossing that border, he can stop ISIS from crossing that border. Refusing to do so was a choice. He is not a state sponsor of terrorism. He is not championing ISIS, nor is he on side with them ideologically. He is not their patron or JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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armorer. But he has spent years letting one of our worst enemies grow stronger while stomping on one of our best regional allies. The United States has forged ugly alliances too, first in aligning itself with the Soviet Union against the Nazis and then by backing Latin American military dictatorships to prevent Communism from spreading in the Western Hemisphere beyond Cuba and Nicaragua. The United States also sided with Saddam Hussein during the Iran-Iraq War. Later, however, we reversed every one of these odious alliances. President Truman collaborated with Stalin against Hitler, but he immediately shifted into a Cold War stance against Russia after the Nazis were finished. Washington’s support for Latin America’sgeneralissimos colla psed completely after the crack-up of the Soviet Union.

The American invasion of Panama to topple Manuel Noriega was planned mere days after the Berlin Wall fell and executed the following month. South America’s oppressive regimes then fell like dominoes. In 2002, the United States demolished Saddam Hussein’s government entirely. Turkey could likewise reverse itself on ISIS. Turkey doesn’t have to like the PKK or any other Kurdish independence movement. That is impossible. All that needs to happen is a recognition in Ankara that ISIS threatens Turkey’s interests and security more than the PKK does.

Optimism is rarely rewarded in this region, but there are some indications that an attitude adjustment in Turkey may be under way. In July, the government finally rounded up hundreds of ISIS JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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members and sent them to prison. It’s hard to say for sure what went through Ankara’s collective head. Maybe the government only arrested ISIS members to get Western critics off its back. Or perhaps the government finally woke up to the fact that ISIS, unlike the Kurds, is a threat to the entire human race. Maybe Turkey figured it could fight both at once. Just a few days later, a suicide bomber killed 28 people at a meeting of pro-Kurdish groups in the Turkish city of Suruc, just across the Syrian border from the Kurdish city of Kobane, which ISIS fought for and lost last year. No one claimed responsibility, but it was almost certainly ISIS. Who else would want to strike Turkey and the Kurds simultaneously? The Kurdish militias are the toughest foes ISIS has yet faced anywhere. Attacking them in Suruc was its way of telling the Kurds that they’re

unsafe even outside Syria and Iraq. At the same time, ISIS sent a message to Turkey. “We don’t want to fight you at the moment. Our war is in Syria. But we can strike inside your country whenever we want, so back off.” Turkey would have united against ISIS if ethnic Turks had been killed, but killing Kurds in Turkey did not inspire an immediate response. “Witnessing the controversy in Turkish public opinion after the attack,” Turkish analyst Metin Gurcan wrote in AlMonitor, “and seeing that the political elites could not even come up with a message of unity against such an attack— one has to admit that the attack has served its purpose.” A few days later, the Turkish government finally allowed the United States to use Incirlik Air Base, just 70 miles from the Syrian border, to launch airstrikes over ISIS-held territory—but only if US JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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airpower is not used to support Kurdish militias. So Turkey is sort of coming around, but not really. Ankara’s only long-term solution to this conundrum is peace with the Kurds. They aren’t going anywhere. They will want out of Turkey, out of Syria, out of Iraq, and out of Iran as long as those countries treat them like second-class citizens or worse. The good news for Turkey—if the Turks ever wise up enough to figure this out—is that the Kurds are the easiest people in the entire Middle East to make friends with. Americans have managed to do so almost effortlessly. So have the Israelis. That’s saying something in that part of the world. The PKK may be intransigent, but if reasonable Kurdish grievances were addressed—including Turkey’s hostility toward besieged Kurds in Syria—then support for the PKK in Turkey would likely evaporate.

Making friends with ISIS, however, is impossible. In their book ISIS: Inside the Army of Terror, Michael Weiss and Hassan Hassan make a compelling case that “the army of terror will be with us indefinitely.” President Obama agrees. The war against ISIS, he said at the Pentagon in early July, could take decades. President George W. Bush said more or less the same thing about al-Qaeda, and ISIS is simply al-Qaeda in Iraq under new management. Decades is an awfully long time for a genocidal terrorist state to exist anywhere, and decades is an awfully long time for a NATO ally to support it even indirectly by refusing to act. Turkey cannot continue to do so indefinitely. ISIS probably won’t let it: it is violently opposed to everyone in the human race aside from itself—but at the same time we should never underestimate the stubborn refusal of the Turks to JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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work out their differences with the Kurds. NATO was formed as an antiRussian bulwark during the Cold War, and ever since the collapse of the Soviet Union many have wondered if the alliance has outlived its usefulness. That question has been put to bed to an extent with Russian malfeasance in Georgia and Ukraine, but if Turkey doesn’t fully reverse itself on ISIS at some point, its membership in NATO will clearly become a vestige of an era that expired a long time ago.

Institutions are cumbersome, bureaucratic, and slow. They cruise on inertia. They have invested so much for so long. But we are where we are. If the Turks don’t eventually reverse themselves fully, the White House, Congress, the State Department, and our genuine allies in NATO will have little choice but to ensure that Turkey is treated accordingly.

Diplomats and heads of state are often the last to notice tectonic geopolitical shifts. They’ve spent years, even decades, forming relationships with their foreign counterparts.

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HOW TO STAY YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL FOREVER Yes you can….

1) Don’t over eat, keep the same weight all the time. One of my favourite actresses Christie Brinkley is the great example of woman who looks absolutely stunning and gorgeous, even though she is almost 60 now. It’s unbelievable! She shared one of the secrets of her beauty – maintain the same weight all the time. Often people have a habit of eating 3 big meals a day, but when you desire to lose weight (or to stay thin), it’s better to appropriate right habits of eating – try to eat smaller portions, but more

often than only 3 times a day, this way you will boost your metabolism and it will be a lot easier to maintain great figure. According to many scientific researches, the ideal way of eating is to eat about 5 or 6 times a day, but smaller portions, and when I say smaller, I mean it! The ideal portion size would be the one that enters into the palm of your hand. Another easy trick to avoid overeating is to drink one glass of water before or after you ate, depending on your preference. Water will fill in the space in your tummy and JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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you will feel satisfied without overeating, and your body will stay very hydrated! 2) Always use sunscreen. UV rays cause extremely big percentage of wrinkles and other signs of ageing. There are two types of sunscreen protection: physical and chemical-based SPFs with UVA and UVB protections. If your skin is sensitive, I would recommend to find sunscreen protection cream with natural minerals – zinc oxide or titanium dioxide. Pay special attention to protect your skin from sun damage when you go on holidays or if you live in a sunny country. 3) Exfoliate your skin regularly. Exfoliation is one of the most important secrets of youthful appearance! It has many benefits: it’s the best way to keep your skin soft and glowing, it helps to keep your

pores from clogging (keeps acne under control), helps with uneven skin tone, keeps lines and wrinkles in check…There are two types of exfoliators: chemical ones and physical ones. When you have sensitive skin – never use harsh or strong exfoliators because it can cause irritation and redness. Ask the specialist’s advise to find the best product that suits your skin type. 4) Hydrate and moisturise your skin daily. There are so many products on the market that can help you to nourish and hydrate your skin. If you are sensitive to cosmetic creams, you can also use totally natural products: such as rose hip oil, argan oil, sweet almond oil, grape seed oil, etc. I personally love using all of the above oils (mixed together or separately) JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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instead of creams and serums (because I have very sensitive fair “porcelain” skin). Another great way to hydrate your skin throughout the day is to spay a refreshing face mist regularly on your face. (You can buy ready face mist in the shop or create one yourself). But the main point here is to take care of your skin daily and never leave it dehydrated or lacking moisture. 5) Focus on the bright side. Being happy makes you look young and beautiful, and good positive mood has a great deal of influence on the way you look and feel. This is why it’s so important to cultivate positive mental attitude, laugh a lot and chose to be happy. So, look at the glass half full instead of half empty, notice all the great and positive things that happen to you and be

thankful for them and remember to smile often. This way you will stay beautiful, young and attractive for longer. 6) Get into the gym. Exercising is proved to be a great mood booster, it can help you to reduce stress and to keep your skin looking healthy. So, don’t neglect this “friend of your beauty” – sport. 7) Eat healthy. This is one of the crucial habits you can appropriate in order to stay beautiful and youthful for a long time. Researches suggest that healthy diet can fend off your skin’s top enemies. So, include fruits, vegetables and fish into your diet! 8) Feel young at heart. Remember to take time for playing and having fun. Embrace your inner child JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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and “wake up” to the excitement and beauty of life! And now, here is a question that can make you think: “If you didn’t know your age, how old you would feel?” This is another important step for feeling younger for longer – feel young and you will be young! 9) Get beauty sleep. Getting enough sleep regularly can help you to boost your energy levels, relief stress and keep your weight down. Getting at least 6-7 hours of sleep every night can help you to feel and look a lot younger than your real age! 10) Physical intimacy is good! Great and healthy love life can also help you to stay beautiful and young for a long time. While making love with your partner – your body cultivates the “hormone of happiness” which not only

strengthens your immune system and boosts your happiness, but also helps you stay younger for longer. Some researches show that people who have happy relationship and regular satisfying intimacy look about 10 years younger than their physical age.

How to remove facial hair naturally? 10 Tips for girls Everyone has hair on their face, but for most women, this hair is very fine and hardly noticeable. It’s when the hair on the face is dark and coarse that it can become noticeable and when there is excessive facial hair, which is a condition called Hirsutism. Although there are treatments such as laser hair removal and electrolysis, they can be both JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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painful and very expensive. There are, however, natural treatments that you can use on facial hair to make it less visible, or remove it altogether. So, if facial hair is a problem for you, here are ten of the best tips on how to remove facial hair naturally. 1. Spearmint tea Hirsutism can be caused by too much of the hormone androgen being in the body and, in a study conducted in Turkey, it was found that drinking spearmint tea can reduce the levels of androgen in the body. You can easily make spearmint tea at home by adding four or five peppermint leaves to boiling water and leaving it to steep for ten minutes. 2. Oatmeal scrub Another good tip on how to remove facial hair naturally is to use oatmeal scrub. Oatmeal is a soft enough ingredient to

use as a scrub even on the sensitive skin. It also has other skin care benefits too, so it will also help to improve the complexion. To make an oatmeal scrub, mix half a tablespoon of ground oatmeal with a tablespoon of honey and a few drops of lemon juice. Gently rub the mixture into your face, against the direction that the hairs are growing and it will gradually remove the hairs. 3. Turmeric Turmeric has been used in China and India for centuries as a way to slow the growth of facial hair. Simply add natural yoghurt to turmeric to make a paste. Massage the paste into your face and leave it on for five minutes before washing off again. If you repeat this regularly, it is said that turmeric will slow, and eventually stop, the growth of facial hair. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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4. Sugar wax Next great tip on how to remove facial hair naturally is to use a homemade sugar wax, and it also said to be a lot less painful than using a storebought wax. Mix two teaspoons of sugar with a teaspoon of honey and a teaspoon of water. Heat the mixture until it bubbles and turns brown and then let it cool for a while, until itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s comfortable to touch. Smooth the paste over your face and the rip it off in the opposite direction of the hair growth. 5. Honey and dried apricot scrub This scrub will clean your face and moisturise it, and the dried apricots contain a high level of lycopene, which is believed to be very effective for removing facial hair. Grind dried apricots into a powder and then add enough honey to make it into a

paste. Apply the paste to your face and gently scrub your skin in a circular motion for about five minutes. If you repeat this process three times a week, it will gradually reduce the hair on your face. 6. Gram flour face mask This is another tried and trusted tip on how to remove facial hair naturally and it comes from India. Mix equal parts of gram flour and turmeric with a little water to make a paste. Apply the paste to your face and then leave it to dry. Then, rub the paste off your face with your finger and a cloth dipped in some warm water. 7. Egg and corn flour mask Next fabulous tip on how to remove facial hair naturally is to use this simple treatment made of egg and corn flour, and it works in very much the same way as waxing. Mix the white of one egg with a JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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tablespoon of cornflour and a tablespoon of sugar into a smooth paste. Apply the paste your face and allow it to dry. Once it has dried completely, it will form a mask and, when you pull it off firmly, it will take the unwanted facial hair with it.

8. Lavender and tea tree oil Tea tree oil and lavender oil contain compounds that have anti-androgenic properties and the oils have been shown to be an effective way to combat mild to moderate cases of hirsutism. You simply mix 5 drops of tea tree oil with 15 drops of lavender oil and apply it to the area of your face that has hair that you wish to remove, two times a day. If you follow this routine for a month or so, it will halt the growth of hair on your face. (Make sure your are not

allergic to these oils and test them before applying to your face.) 9. Barely scrub Barely is another natural ingredient that is kind enough to the skin to be used in a facial scrub that will remove unwanted facial hair. To make a barley facial scrub, mix a tablespoon of barley powder with a tablespoon of lime juice and a tablespoon of milk. Massage your skin with this mixture for a couple of minutes and wash off. 10. Include more phytoestrogens in your diet Our final tip on how to remove facial hair naturally is to eat foods that will balance the male and the female hormones in the body. Foods like, flax seeds, liquorice and fennel contain plant substances, called phytoestrogens, which mimic oestrogen in the body and will JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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help to negate the effects of excessive amounts of the male hormone, androgen, which can be the cause of facial hair.

SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS OF LIVER DISEASE INCLUDE:          

Skin and eyes that appear yellowish (jaundice) Abdominal pain and swelling Swelling in the legs and ankles Itchy skin Dark urine color Pale stool color, or bloody or tar-colored stool Chronic fatigue Nausea or vomiting Loss of appetite Tendency to bruise easily

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When to see a doctor Make an appointment with your doctor if you have any persistent signs or symptoms that worry you. Seek immediate medical attention if you have abdominal pain that is so severe that you can't stay still.

Causes Liver disease has many causes. Infection Parasites and viruses can infect the liver, causing inflammation and that reduces liver function. The viruses that cause liver damage can be spread through blood or semen, contaminated food or water, or close contact with a person who is infected. The most common types of liver infection are hepatitis viruses, including: Hepatitis A  Hepatitis B  Hepatitis C Immune system abnormality 

Diseases in which your immune system attacks certain parts of your body (autoimmune) can affect your liver. Examples of autoimmune liver diseases include:  

Autoimmune hepatitis Primary biliary cirrhosis JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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Primary sclerosing cholangitis Genetics



An abnormal gene inherited from one or both of your parents can cause various substances to build up in your liver, resulting in liver damage. Genetic liver diseases include: Hemochromatosis  Hyperoxaluria and oxalosis  Wilson's disease Cancer and other growths 

Examples include: Liver cancer  Bile duct cancer  Liver adenoma Other 

Additional, common causes of liver disease include: Chronic alcohol abuse  Fat accumulating in the liver (nonalcoholic fatty liver disease) Risk factors 

Factors that may increase your risk of liver disease include:         

Heavy alcohol use Injecting drugs using shared needles Tattoos or body piercings Blood transfusion before 1992 Exposure to other people's blood and body fluids Unprotected sex Exposure to certain chemicals or toxins Diabetes Obesity JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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ď&#x201A;ˇ

High levels of triglycerides in your blood

Complications Complications of liver disease vary, depending on the cause of your liver problems. Untreated liver disease may progress to liver failure, a life-threatening condition.

Tips for Enjoying a Healthy Sex Life as You Get Older

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Sex can be a powerful emotional experience and a great tool for protecting or improving health, and it's certainly not only for the young. Sex over the age of 50 can present challenges, and you may feel discouraged by issues connected with the aging process, but these problems are not insurmountable. With better understanding and an open mind, you can continue to enjoy a physically and emotionally fulfilling sex lifeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;it's not a question of age, but of desire.

Good sex at any age The need for intimacy is ageless. And studies now confirm that no matter what your gender, you can enjoy sex for as long as you wish. Naturally, sex at 70 or 80 may not be like it is at 20 or 30â&#x20AC;&#x201D; but in some ways it can be better. As an older adult, you may feel wiser than you were in your earlier years, and know what works best for you when it comes to your sex life. Older people often have a great deal more self-confidence and selfawareness, and feel released JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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from the unrealistic ideals of youth and prejudices of others. And with children grown and work less demanding, couples are better able to relax and enjoy one another without the old distractions. For a number of reasons, though, many adults worry about sex in their later years, and end up turning away from sexual encounters. Some older adults feel embarrassed, either by their aging bodies or by their “performance,” while others are affected by illness or loss of a partner. Without accurate information and an open mind, a temporary situation can turn into a permanent one. You can avoid letting this happen by being proactive. Whether you’re seeking to restart or improve your sex life, it’s important to be ready to try new things, and to ask for professional help if necessary. There is much you

can do to compensate for the normal changes that come with aging. With proper information and support, your later years can be an exciting time to explore both the emotional and sensual aspects of your sexuality. Benefits of sex as you age As an older adult, the two things that may have brought the greatest joy—children and career—may no longer as prevalent in your everyday life. Personal relationships often take on a greater significance, and sex can be an important way of connecting. Sex has the power to:  Improve mental and physical health. Sex can burn fat, cause the brain to release endorphins, and drastically reduce anxiety.  Increase lifespan. Through its healthimproving benefits, a JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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good sex life can add years to your life.  Solidify relationships. Sex is a chance to express the closeness of your deepest relationship.  Give refuge. Sex gives you a chance to escape from the sometimes harsh realities of the world. Tips for better sex as you age: Accept and celebrate who you are Sex in later life may not be the same as it was in your youth— but that doesn’t have to be a bad thing. In fact, sex can be more enjoyable than ever. As you find yourself embracing your older identity, you can:  Reap the benefits of experience. The independence and selfconfidence that comes with age can be very attractive to your spouse or potential partners. No

matter your gender, you may feel better about your body at 62 or 72 than you did at 22. And it is likely that you now know more about yourself and what makes you excited and happy. Your experience and self-possession can make your sex life exciting for you and your partner.  Look ahead. As you age, try to let go of expectations for your sex life. Do your best to avoid dwelling on how things are different. If you enjoyed an active sex life in your younger years, there’s no reason to slow down with age, unless you want to. A positive attitude and open mind can go a long way toward improving your sex life as you age.

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 Love and appreciate your older self. Naturally, your body is going through changes as you age. You look and feel differently than you did when you were younger. But if you can accept these changes as natural and hold your head up high, you’ll not only feel better, you’ll also be more attractive to others. Confidence and honesty garner the respect of others—and can be sexy and appealing. Good sex as you age is safe sex as you age As an older adult, you need to be just as careful as younger people when having sex with a new partner. You may not be able to get pregnant, but you’re still susceptible to sexually transmitted diseases. Talk to

your partner, and protect yourself. Tips for better sex as you age: Communicate with your partner As bodies and feelings change as you grow older, it’s more important than ever to communicate your thoughts, fears, and desires with your partner. Encourage your partner to communicate fully with you, too. Speaking openly about sex may not come easily to you, but improving your communication will help both of you feel closer, and can make sex more pleasurable. Talking about sex Broaching the subject of sex can be difficult for some people, but it should get easier once you begin. And as an added bonus, you may find that just talking about sex can make you feel sexy. Try the JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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following strategies as you begin the conversation.  Be playful. Being playful can make communication about sex a lot easier. Use humor, gentle teasing, and even tickling to lighten the mood.  Be honest. Honesty fosters trust and relaxes both partners—and can be very attractive. Let your partner know how you are feeling and what you hope for in a sex life.  Discuss new ideas. If you want to try something new, discuss it with your partner, and be open to his or her ideas, too. The senior years—with more time and fewer distractions—can be a time of creativity and passion.  Modernize. You may belong to a generation in which sex was a taboo

subject. But talking openly about your needs, desires, and concerns with your partner can make you closer—and help you both enjoy sex and intimacy. Tips for better sex as you age: Focus on intimacy and physical touch A good sex life—at any age— involves a lot more than just sex. It’s also about intimacy and touch, things anyone can benefit from. Even if you have health problems or physical disabilities, you can engage in intimate acts and benefit from closeness with another person. Take the pressure off by putting aside your old ideas of what sex “should be.” Focus instead on the importance of tenderness and contact. Taking your time Without pressing workloads or young children to worry about, JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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many older adults have far more time to devote to pleasure and intimacy. Use your time to become more intimate.

fosters confidence and comfort, and can help both erectile and dryness problems.

 Stretch your experience. Start with a romantic dinner—or breakfast— before lovemaking. Share romantic or erotic literature and poetry. Having an experience together, sexual or not, is a powerful way of connecting intimately.  Don’t be shy. Hold hands and touch your partner often, and encourage him or her to touch you. Tell your partner what you love about him/her, and share your ideas about new sexual experiences you might have together.  Relax. Find something that relaxes both partners, whether it’s trying massage or baths together. Relaxation

Expanding your definition of sex Sexuality necessarily takes on a broader definition as we age. Try to open up to the idea that sex can mean many things, and that closeness with a partner can be expressed in many ways.  It’s not just about intercourse. Sex can also be about emotional pleasure, sensory pleasure, and relationship pleasure. Intercourse is only one way to have fulfilling sex. Touching, kissing, and other intimate sexual contact can be just as rewarding for both you and your partner. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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 Natural changes. As you age, it's normal for you and your partner to have different sexual abilities and needs. Find new ways to enjoy sexual contact and intimacy. You may have intercourse less often than you used to, but the closeness and love you feel will remain. Tips for better sex as you age: Find what works for you You might not be as comfortable with some sexual positions as you once were, but that doesn’t mean you need to give up an activity that is pleasurable for you—and miss out on feeling close to your partner. Keep in mind that it’s not all about intercourse or recreating the way things were when you were younger. The key to a great sex life is finding out what works for you now. Sex as you age may call for some creativity. Use the

following ideas as inspiration, but don’t be afraid to come up with your own.  Experiment. Try sexual positions that you both find comfortable and pleasurable, taking changes into account. For men, if erectile dysfunction is an issue, try sex with the woman on top, as hardness is less important. For women, using lubrication can help.  Expand what sex means. Holding each other, gentle touching, kissing, and sensual massage are all ways to share passionate feelings. Try oral sex or masturbation as fulfilling substitutes to intercourse.  Change your routine. Simple, creative changes can improve your sex life. Change the time of day JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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when you have sex to a time when you have more energy. For example, try being intimate in the morning rather than at the end of a long day.  Foreplay. Because it might take longer for you or your partner to become aroused, take more time to set the stage for romance, such as a romantic dinner or an evening of dancing. Or try connecting first by extensive touching or kissing.  Playfulness. Being playful with your partner is important for a good sex life at any age, but can be especially helpful as you age. Tease or tickle your partner— whatever it takes to have fun. With the issues you may be facing physically or emotionally, play may

be the ticket to help you both relax. Tips for better sex as you age: Restarting a stalled sex drive Some older adults give up having a sex life due to emotional or medical challenges. But the vast majority of these issues do not have to be permanent. You can restart a stalled sex drive—and get your sex life back in motion. Remember that maintaining a sex life into your senior years is a matter of good health. Try thinking of sex as something that can keep you in shape, both physically and mentally. Understanding roadblocks The path to satisfying sex as you age is not always smooth. Understanding the problems can be an effective first step to finding solutions.

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 Emotional obstacles. Stress, anxiety, and depression can affect your interest in sex and your ability to become aroused. Psychological changes may even interfere with your ability to connect emotionally with your partner.  Body image. As you notice more wrinkles or gray hair, or become aware of love handles or cellulite, you may feel less attractive to your partner. These feelings can make sex less appealing, and can cause you to become less interested in sex.  Low self-esteem. Changes at work, retirement, or other major life changes may leave you feeling temporarily uncertain about your sense of purpose. This can

undermine your selfesteem and make you feel less attractive to others.  Worry over “performance.” Worrying about how you will perform, or whether you are worthy of sexual attention from your partner, can lead to impotence in men and lack of arousal or orgasm in women. This may be a problem you have never before had to face. Jumpstarting your sex drive Sex drives can be naturally stalled as you face the realities of aging, but it is possible to overcome these bumps in the road.  Communicate. Talk to your partner, or to a friend or counselor, about your issues, whether they’re physical or emotional. Explain the JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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anxieties you are feeling, ask for and accept reassurance, and continue the conversation as things come up.  Just “do it.” Sex is just as healthy and necessary as exercise and, just like exercise, it may surprise you with pleasure and satisfaction—even if you weren’t “in the mood.” So get back into practice. Once you’re back in the habit, you’ll start to feel better and your sex drive should naturally increase.  Increase your activity level. Bumping up your general level of activity will benefit your sex drive by increasing your energy and sense of well-being.  Let it go. As much as you can, use your age and experience to be wise and candid with yourself. Let go of your feelings of

inadequacy and let yourself enjoy sex as you age. Tips for better sex as you age: Know when to seek help No matter what your age, losing your desire for intimacy and touch altogether isn’t normal. In fact, loss of interest or function may be signs of a medical problem—one that may be best addressed by a doctor. If something is getting in the way of your desire or ability to have a good sex life, don't let embarrassment keep you from asking your doctor for help. Working with a professional, there is much you can do to improve your sex life. Keep in mind that anything that affects your general health and well-being can also affect your sexual function. Sexual health can be affected by:

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 Medical conditions. Illnesses that involve the cardiovascular system, high blood pressure, diabetes, hormonal problems, depression, or anxiety can affect sex drive and function. You can talk to your doctor about strategies to combat these issues.  Medications. Certain medications can inhibit your sexual response, including your desire for sex, your ability to become aroused and your orgasmic function. You can talk to your doctor about switching to a different medication with fewer sexual side effects. Sex after a heart attack Many older adults with heart disease—or who’ve suffered a past heart attack—are less sexually active than they used

to be or even stop having sex completely, often fearing that sex may trigger another heart attack. However, for most people it is still possible to enjoy an active sex life with heart disease. According to a recent study, for every 10,000 people who have sex once a week, only two or three will experience another heart attack, and their risk of dying during sex is extremely low.  Check with your doctor before resuming sexual activity.  Participate in a cardiac rehabilitation program to improve your fitness.  If you can exercise hard enough to work up a light sweat without triggering symptoms, you should be safe to have sex.  Wait to have sex if you have advanced heart JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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failure, severe valve disease, uncontrolled arrhythmia, unstable angina, unstable or severe heart disease.  Once your condition is under control, ask your doctor when it’s safe to resume sexual activity.

However, sex has risks. Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) can cause emotional and physical discomfort. They can also cause serious medical problems like infertility. Chronic pelvic pain can affect your enjoyment not just of sex but also of daily life. Sexual dysfunction can make sex seem like more of a chore than a pleasure. Having a healthy sex life takes work. Fortunately, most of the time it’s easy to improve your sexual health. Part 2 of 6: STDs

HEALTHY SEX FOR WOMEN A pleasurable, satisfying sex life is good for your health. Sex can reduce emotional stress. It can be a bonding experience within a relationship. It can also be a great deal of fun.

Protect Yourself from Sexually Transmitted Diseases If you are a sexually active woman, you are at risk of contracting an STD. Your risk is higher if you’ve had 15 lifetime partners than if you’ve had only one. However, it’s possible to contract an STD the first time you have sex. You JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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can even contract an STD if your partner is also a virgin. It’s rare, but it can happen. Many children contract oral herpes from their families while growing up. They can then pass it on to a partner during oral sex. There are ways to protect yourself from STDs. They may not be 100 percent successful all the time, but they can help. Get Vaccinated Currently two types of STDs are preventable by vaccine. These are the human papillomavirus (HPV) and hepatitis. Two HPV vaccines are available. Cervarix protects against the two types of HPV that cause most cases of cervical cancer. Gardasil protects against those two types as well as the two types that cause the majority of genital warts. Both vaccines are most effective when given

before a woman starts having sex. You can still get vaccinated up through your late 20s. A vaccine is also available against hepatitis B. It’s normally given during infancy. Hepatitis B causes liver disease. It can be transmitted through sexual activity. A vaccine for hepatitis A is available as well. Hepatitis A is not usually spread during sex, but it can be transmitted during oral-anal contact. The vaccine is recommended for all children at age 1. Practice Safe Sex Safe sex is very effective at preventing STDs that spread through infected secretions, such as HIV. It’s less effective at preventing STDs that are transmitted through skin-toskin contact. However, it can still reduce your risk. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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Try to use latex or polyurethane condoms and dental dams every time you have sex. There is always an advantage to using protection. Consistent use of barriers can reduce the transmission of STIs during:  oral sex  vaginal sex  anal sex Many women do not realize that oral sex can transmit disease. However, a number of STDs can be transmitted during oral sex. These include:  syphilis  HPV  herpes A recent rise in the increase of oral cancer is thought to be due to the transmission of HPV during oral sex.

Regular STD testing can reduce the long-term consequences of an infection. Left untreated, bacterial diseases such as gonorrhea can have serious health consequences, including infertility. Screening can help to prevent such outcomes. Screening can also reduce your risk of contracting an STD. Make a date to get tested with a new partner before starting a sexual relationship. Then you will each know if you are putting the other at risk. STD screening is a good idea for anyone who is sexually active. STDs can affect individuals of any age. Even people in monogamous marriages can end up with an STD if both partners weren’t screened before they got together.

Get Screened for STDs Have Regular Pap Smears JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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Pap smears are a routine part of women’s healthcare. These tests detect early signs of cervical cancer. Precancerous changes can be treated before they become serious problems. Most cases of cervical cancer are caused by infection with HPV. Therefore, practicing safer sex can reduce your risk of cervical cancer. HPV vaccination can reduce your risk as well. However, there are many types of cancer-causing HPV. Not all of them are covered by the vaccine. Regular Pap smears are important even for women who have received the HPV vaccine. Invasive cervical cancer, and its treatment, can have negative effects on your sex life and fertility. It’s better to catch cervical changes early than wait for them to cause damage.

Tell Your Doctor About Pelvic Pain Women often assume that pelvic pain is a normal part of womanhood. They have been told that menstruation is supposed to hurt. Therefore, they may not discuss pelvic pain with their doctor. However, women should not have to live with serious pelvic pain. Often severe pain during menses is a sign of a potentially treatable health problem. Such problems can also cause problems with fertility and pain during sex. Endometriosis Endometriosis is an overgrowth of the lining of the uterus. This lining is called the endometrium. It’s the source of blood and tissue during menstruation. It also nourishes the growing fetus.

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When a woman has endometriosis, the endometrium grows outside the uterus. It can attach to other organs and the inside of the abdomen. This can be extremely painful. Symptoms of endometriosis include:  severe menstrual pain  pain during sex  pain during bowel movements  heavy bleeding  bleeding between periods Pain from endometriosis can often be helped with treatment. Treatment depends on whether you want to have children. Options include:  pain medication  hormone therapy  surgery to remove the excess tissue  hysterectomy (removal of the uterus) Fibroids

Fibroids are noncancerous tumors of the uterus. According to the Mayo Clinic, up to 75 percent of women have fibroids. However, most women will never need treatment. Fibroids are not necessarily painful or problematic. They do not increase your risk of cancer. Large fibroids may affect your ability to have children. Fibroids can affect your sex life if they cause:  pelvic pain  pain during sex  problems with menstrual bleeding. If treatment is necessary, several options are available. They will not necessarily affect your ability to have children. Part 4 of 6: Sexual Dysfunction Find a Way to Enjoy Sex Female sexual dysfunction is common. Many women have JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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problems with their sex lives. Effective treatments are available for most common forms of female sexual dysfunction. There are four main types of female sexual dysfunction. Lack of Interest in Sex There are many reasons why a woman may not be interested in sex. She may be too tired. She may be annoyed with her partner. Her hormone levels may be out of balance and affecting her interest. If you have experienced a sudden lack of interest in sex, talk to your doctor. There may be a biological cause. Your doctor can also refer you to a sex therapist for counseling. If you want to be interested in sex, you can usually learn how to make that happen. Difficulty Becoming Aroused

Difficulties becoming aroused, or maintaining arousal, are not uncommon. These problems may be medically based. They may also be based in relationship problems. Sexual beliefs can affect your ability to become aroused. If you are concerned about problems with arousal, talk to a doctor. Help may be available. Some arousal problems respond best to medical therapy. Other women just need help with stress reduction and improving their relationships. Painful Sex Sexual intercourse shouldn’t be painful. If you are having pain during sex, talk to your doctor. There are several potential causes of sexual pain. These include:  endometriosis  fibroids JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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 vaginismus  vulvodynia It’s very important to get help for painful intercourse as soon as possible. If not, fear of pain may lead you to clench up during sex. This can make sex even more painful. It can be a vicious cycle. Painful sex can be treated in a variety of ways, depending on the cause. When you talk to your doctor about your problem, be prepared to discuss if you have pain:  during penetration  when touched on the outside of your vulva  because your vagina is clenching uncontrollably  during deep penetration The details are important. They can help your doctor diagnose underlying problems that may be causing your pain. Problems with Orgasm

Problems with orgasm are often the easiest type of sexual dysfunction to treat. Many women who can’t orgasm simply aren’t getting the right type of stimulation during sex. There is a common misconception that women should be able to orgasm from vaginal intercourse. However, the majority of women need direct clitoral stimulation to climax. If you have difficulty reaching orgasm, you may benefit from seeing a sex therapist. A sex therapist can help you learn how to have an orgasm. Educational books and videos are also available to help you find your orgasm. Part 5 of 6: Family Planning Choose When (and If) to Have Children If you are a woman who has sex with men, it’s important to know your options for JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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contraception. Trying to get pregnant, or worry about unwanted pregnancy, takes a toll on many women’s sex lives. Reversible Contraception If you think you might want to have children eventually, but don’t want to have them now, reversible contraception is the way to go. Contraceptive options vary greatly in convenience, ease of use, and cost. They range from the cheap, use-when-needed condom to an intrauterine device (IUD), which can last for up to 10 years. Other contraceptive options include:      

birth control pills hormonal patches hormonal rings female condoms cervical caps diaphragms

 contraceptive sponges Talk to your doctor about which option is right for you. The effectiveness varies greatly. So does the ease of use. However, there’s one thing every woman should remember. There are lots of ways to prevent pregnancy. Only condoms can effectively reduce the risk of STDs. Sterilization If you never plan to have children, you may choose to undergo sterilization. Female sterilization methods work by blocking the Fallopian tubes. The sperm cannot reach the egg. This means a pregnancy cannot be achieved. If you are in a couple, talk to your partner about your options. Sterilization is generally less painful and invasive for men than women. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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Some sterilization procedures are theoretically reversible. However, reversal does not always work. Therefore, you should treat the procedure as permanent. Part 6 of 6: Aging and Sex Don’t Let Age Slow You Down The best way to keep your sex life healthy is to keep having sex. Regular sexual activity helps to keep the vagina healthy. However, even if you haven’t had sex in a while, age doesn’t have to hinder your sex life. You just have to keep certain factors in mind. Balance Your Hormones The perimenopausal period occurs five to 10 years before menopause. During this period, your hormones may fluctuate wildly. This may cause:  a lower libido  irregular periods

 vaginal dryness A low-dose birth control pill or hormonal IUD may be able to help. However, you shouldn’t use hormones if you are still trying to get pregnant. As you move into menopause, your hormone levels will continue to change. A lack of estrogen can lead to vaginal atrophy and dryness. This can be helped with hormone replacement therapy (HRT) or local estrogen creams. Physical Changes Many women experience vaginal dryness after menopause. Their vaginal tissues may also become more delicate and sensitive. This can increase the risk of contracting an STD. It can also make sex more painful. Problems with vaginal dryness can often be helped with sexual lubricants. Sometimes these JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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lubricants can be used in combination with an estrogen cream or suppository. The estrogen helps to restore elasticity to the vaginal tissues. Sexual Changes Women’s arousal patterns change as they age. It may take longer for them to become aroused. They may have less lubrication. On the other hand, no longer having to worry about pregnancy can be freeing. Some women enjoy sex even more once they’ve gone past menopause. Sexual patterns for men change with age as well. Women who have sex with male partners may notice that it takes longer for their partners to get an erection. The erection may not be as firm as it used to be. However, many men may be able to last longer during intercourse.

Your sex life may change, but you’re never too old to enjoy sex. Don’t Forget to Play Safe With the increase in erectile dysfunction (ED) drugs, active sex lives are on the increase in older populations. Perhaps unsurprisingly, this has led to an increase in STDs among older adults. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), HIV is a growing problem in mature adults. Individuals over the age of 55 accounted for 19 percent of people living with HIV in the United States in 2010. Many older adults aren’t aware of safe sex techniques. Condoms and lubricant should be used during anal and vaginal intercourse. Condoms or dental dams can be used during oral sex.

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Safe sex is not necessary if you’re in a long-term relationship where both partners have tested negative. In all other cases, it’s an excellent idea.

You can gauge a person’s love for you by how they treat you when they are upset with you. Love is a verb, not a noun. When a lightbulb goes out, you fix the lightbulb. You don’t get a new house. Don’t settle for someone who has zero regard for your feelings or wants just because you’ve been together a long time. Just because you love each other does not mean that you’re good together long-term.

TIMELESS PIECES OF ADVISE ABOUT LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS

Don’t stay with someone who antagonizes you or belittles you. If you feel lonely, you’re better off being alone. Know when to walk away.

No relationship is perfect and there will be conflict. What matters is the desire to solve the problem. Always fight the problem, not the other person. If you keep this in mind when arguing, you’ll be able to actually resolve the issue than be mad at each other. Don’t look for a girl you want to treat like a princess, look for JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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a girl you want to treat like a partner. Don’t disparage your SO behind their back. Confidence isn’t “I know she likes me”, confidence is “I’ll be okay whether she likes me or not.” There are a number of people you can be compatible with. No one is perfect. You have to work at love. You’re not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm. Marry the one who gives you the same feeling you get when you see food coming at a restaurant. The grass is not greener on the other side, it’s greener where you water it. Stop trying to find the right person and start trying to BE the right person.

The person who cares least in the relationship has the most control. Don’t fall in love with your waitress, hooker, or therapist. It’s better to be happy than to be right. Always be the first to genuinely apologize after a fight. You can’t expect someone to love you when you can’t love yourself. Just because you liked the friend-version of someone doesn’t mean you’ll like the relationship-version of them. Before you move in with your partner, go on a road trip with them. Don’t be afraid to open up and be vulnerable. Vulnerability can bring you closer together and strengthen the two of you. When you and your SO are arguing, remember—it’s you JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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and them VS the problem. Not you VS them.

far outweighs the initial outlay, throw it away and move on.

Just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.

Out of all the things needed for a successful relationship, love barely makes the top 5. Honesty, loyalty, trust, and communication all have to be there.

Don’t fall in love with someone’s potential. It takes two happy individuals to make a happy relationship. If the world didn’t give each other second chances, we would all be single. Everyone is searching for the perfect person, but no one is trying to be the perfect person.

Always hold hands when talking about the hard stuff. It helps to keep the negative emotions in check & shows you care. Be the man or woman you would want your future or current child dating. Love is about appreciation, not possession.

If you love the memories more than the relationship, it’s time to move on.

Don’t go to bed angry. Everything will be there and worse in the morning.

Just because a person is right or perfect for you, you may not be the right one for them.

Always seduce your lover, even if you are in a committed relationship. Otherwise, another person will.

If it’s broken, fix it. If you’ve lost count of how many times it’s broken, or the cost of repair

If she threatens to leave, help her pack her bags. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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Keep no secrets, tell no lies. Sometimes you gotta wise up and let go. Yes, it hurts. But it’ll hurt more in the future. Relationships aren’t hard. If it is hard, you are probably with the wrong person. Love is not a feeling. Feelings fade, change, respond to situations and events. Love is a choice. If it feels wrong at the beginning, it probably won’t get better. If you’re keeping score you already lost. Love is an action, not a feeling. It’s learned and developed skill, not an experience. Not that the romantic feeling doesn’t exist or isn’t a wonderful part of the relationship, but it doesn’t make it last. The best sign of a healthy relationship is no sign of it on Facebook.

Communication is a key part to building a healthy relationship. The first step is making sure you both want and expect the same things—being on the same page is very important. The following tips can help you create and maintain a healthy relationship: Speak Up. In a healthy relationship, if something is bothering you, it’s best to talk about it instead of holding it in.  Respect Your Partner. Your partner’s wishes and feelings have value. Let your significant other know you are making an effort to keep their ideas in mind. Mutual respect is essential in maintaining healthy relationships.  Compromise. Disagreem ents are a natural part of healthy relationships, but it’s important that you find a way to compromise if you disagree on something. Try 

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to solve conflicts in a fair and rational way.  Be Supportive. Offer reassurance and encouragement to your partner. Also, let your partner know when you need their support. Healthy relationships are about building each other up, not putting each other down.  Respect Each Other’s Privacy. Just because you’re in a relationship, doesn’t mean you have to share everything and constantly be together. Healthy relationships require space. Healthy Boundaries Creating boundaries is a good way to keep your relationship healthy and secure. By setting boundaries together, you can both have a deeper understanding of the type of relationship that you and your partner want. Boundaries are not meant to make you feel trapped or like you’re “walking on eggshells.” Creating boundaries is not a sign of secrecy or distrust — it’s an

expression of what makes you feel comfortable and what you would like or not like to happen within the relationship. Remember, healthy boundaries shouldn’t restrict your ability to: Go out with your friends without your partner.  Participate in activities and hobbies you like.  Not have to share passwords to your email, social media accounts or phone.  Respect each other’s individual likes and needs. Healthy Relationship Boosters 

Even healthy relationships can use a boost now and then. You may need a boost if you feel disconnected from your partner or like the relationship has gotten stale. If so, find a fun, simple activity you both enjoy, like going on a walk, and talk about the reasons why you want to be in the relationship. Then, keep using healthy JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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behaviors as you continue dating. If you’re single (and especially if you’re a single parent), don’t worry if you need a boost too! Being single can be the best and worst feeling, but remember relationships don’t just include your significant other and you. Think about all the great times you’ve had with your parents, siblings, friends, children, other family members, etc.. Try going out with the people you love and care about the most — watch movies together, go out to eat, take a day off from your busy life and just enjoy being you! If it helps, also talk about your feelings about the relationships in your life. If you just want them to listen, start by telling them that. Then ask what makes relationships good and what makes them bad? Along the way, if you need advice, feel free to contact us. We’re here to help 24/7.

And don’t forget, the relationship you can always boost up is the one you have with yourself! What Isn’t a Healthy Relationship? Relationships that are not healthy are based on power and control, not equality and respect. In the early stages of an abusive relationship, you may not think the unhealthy behaviors are a big deal. However, possessiveness, insults, jealous accusations, yelling, humiliation, pulling hair, pushing or other negative, abusive behaviors, are — at their root — exertions of power and control. Remember that abuse is always a choice and you deserve to be respected. There is no excuse for abuse of any kind. If you think your relationship is unhealthy, it’s important to think about your safety now. Consider these points as you move forward: Understand that a person can only change if they want 

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to. You can’t force your partner to alter their behavior if they don’t believe they’re wrong.  Focus on your own needs. Are you taking care of yourself? Your wellness is always important. Watch your stress levels, take time to be with friends, get enough sleep. If you find that your relationship is draining you, consider ending it.  Connect with your support systems. Often, abusers try to isolate their partners. Talk to your

friends, family members, teachers and others to make sure you’re getting the emotional support you need. Remember, our advocates are always ready to talk if you need a listening ear.  Think about breaking up. Remember that you deserve to feel safe and accepted in your relationship.

TOMAS ROBERT LINDAHL FRS FMedSci (born 28 January 1938) is a Swedish-born British scientist specialising in cancer research.

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In 2015, he was awarded the Nobel Prize in Chemistry for mechanistic studies of DNA repair. Education Lindahl was born in Kungsholmen, Stockholm, S weden to Folke Robert Lindahl and Ethel Hulda Hultberg. He received a PhD degree in 1967, and an MD degree qualification in 1970, from the Karolinska Institutet in Stockholm. After obtaining his research doctorate, Lindahl did postdoctoral research at Princeton and Rockefeller University. He was professor of medical chemistry at the University of Gothenburg 1978â&#x20AC;&#x201C;82. After moving to the United Kingdom he joined the Imperial Cancer Research Fund (now Cancer Research UK) as a researcher in 1981. From 1986 to 2005 he

was the first Director of Cancer Research UK's Clare Hall Laboratories in Hertfordshire, since 2015 part of the Francis Crick Institute. He continued to research there until 2009. He has contributed to many papers on DNA repair and the genetics of cancer. Lindahl received the Royal Society's Royal Medal in 2007 "making fundamental contributions to our understanding of DNA repair. His achievements stand out for their great originality, breadth and lasting influence." He is a member of theNorwegian Academy of Science and Letters. He was awarded the Copley Medal in 2010. He was elected a foundingFellow of the Academy of Medical Sciences (FMedSci) in 1998. He was elected a Fellow of the Royal Society (FRS) elected in JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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1988, his certificate of election reads: â&#x20AC;&#x153; Dr. Tomas Lindahl is noted for his contributions to the comprehension of DNA repair at the molecular level in bacterial and mammalian cells. He was the first to isolate a mammalian DNA ligase and to describe a totally unanticipated novel group of DNA glycosylases as mediators of DNA excision repair. He has also discovered a unique class of enzymes in mammalian cells, namely the methyltransferases, which mediate the adaptive response to alkylation of DNA and has shown that the expression of these enzymes is regulated by the ada gene. More recently he has elucidated the molecular defect in Blooms

â&#x20AC;?

syndrome to be the lack of DNA ligase I. Apart from providing profound insights into the nature of the DNA repair process his very important contributions promise to facilitate the design of more selective chemotherapeutic drugs for the treatment of cancer. Lindahl has also made a number of significant contributions to understanding at the DNA level the mechanism of transformation of Blymphocytes by the Epstein-Barr virus. The most notable of these was the first description of the occurrence in lymphoid cells of closed circular duplex viral DNA. He shared the Nobel Prize in Chemistry in 2015. The Swedish Academy noted that "The Nobel Prize in Chemistry 2015 was awarded jointly to Tomas Lindahl, Paul Modrich JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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and Aziz Sancar 'for mechanistic studies of DNA repair'."

AZIZ SANCAR (born 8 September 1946) is a Turkish and American biochemistand molecular biologist specializing in DNA repair, cell cycle checkpoints, and the circadian clock. In 2015, he was awarded the Nobel Prize in Chemistry for mechanistic studies of DNA repair.

He is the co-founder of the Aziz and Gwen Sancar Foundation, which is a nonprofit organization to promote Turkish culture and to support Turkish students in the United States. Early life and career Aziz Sancar was born into a lower-middle-class family in the Savur district of Mardin

Province, southeastern Turkey on September 8, 1946. He was the seventh child of eight. His parents were illiterate; however, they put great emphasis on education. He is the cousin of HDP Mardin deputy Mithat Sancar. Aziz Sancar is honorary member of the Turkish Academy of Sciences and the American Academy of Arts and Sciences. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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His longest-running study has involved photolyase and the mechanisms of photoreactivation. In his inaugural article in the PNAS, Sancar captures the elusive photolyase radicals he has chased for nearly 20 years, thus providing direct observation of the photocycle for thymine dimer repair. Aziz Sancar was elected to the National Academy of Sciences in 2005 as the first Turkish-American member. He is the Sarah Graham Kenan Professor of Biochemistry, at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. He is married to Gwen Boles Sancar, who graduated the same year and who is also a Professor of Biochemistry and Biophysics at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. Together, they founded Carolina Turk Evi, a permanent Turkish Center in close proximity to the campus of UNC-CH, which provides graduate housing for four Turkish researchers at UNCCH, short term guest services

for Turkish visiting scholars, and a center for promoting Turkish-American interchange. Education Sancar completed his M.D. degree in Istanbul University of Turkey and completed his Ph.D. degree on the photoreactivating enzyme of E. coli in 1977 at the University of Texas at Dallas in the laboratory of Dr. C. Stan Rupert, now Professor Emeritus. Awards He was awarded the 2015 Nobel Prize in Chemistry along with Tomas Lindahl and Paul L. Modrich for their mechanistic studies of DNA repair. Sancar is the second Turkish Nobel laureate after Orhan Pamuk, who is also an alumnus of Istanbul University. Controversies When questioned about his ethnicity by the BBC, Aziz Sancar stated that he was JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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disturbed by such remarks. He then referred to the English people as "infidels" who he blamed for stirring problems in the Middle East. PAUL LAWRENCE MODRICH (born June 13, 1946) is the James B. Duke Professor of Biochemistry at D uke University and Investigator

at the Howard Hughes Medical Institute. He received a Ph.D. degree in 1973 from Stanford University and an S.B. degree in 1968 from MIT. He is known for his research on DNA mismatch repair.

Modrich joined Duke University's faculty in 1976 and has been a Howard Hughes Investigator since 1994. He works primarily on strand-directed mismatch repair. His lab demonstrated how DNA mismatch repair serves as a copyeditor to prevent errors from DNA polymerase. Matthew Meselson previously proposed the existence of recognition of mismatches. Modrich performed biochemical experiments to study mismatch repair in E. coli. They later searched for proteins associated with mismatch repair in humans. He has been awarded the Nobel Prize in Chemistry 2015 jointly with Aziz Sancar and Tomas Lindahl. Dr. Modrich is also a fellow of the American Academy of Arts and Sciences, and a member of the Institute of Medicine and the National Academy of Sciences. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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A GOOD MAN IS HARD TO FIND BY FLANNERY O'CONNOR From:Flannery O'Connor: Collected Works the Library of America Flannery O'Connor 1925-1964 THE GRANDMOTHER didn't want to go to Florida. She wanted to visit some of her connections in east Tennessee and she was seizing at every chance to change Bailey's mind. Bailey was the son she lived with, her only boy. He was sitting on the edge of his chair at the table, bent over the orange sports section of the Journal. "Now look here, Bailey," she said, "see here, read this," and she stood with one hand on her thin hip and the other rattling the newspaper

at his bald head. "Here this fellow that calls himself The Misfit is aloose from the Federal Pen and headed toward Florida and you read here what it says he did to these people. Just you read it. I wouldn't take my children in any direction with a criminal like that aloose in it. I couldn't answer to my conscience if I did." Bailey didn't look up from his reading so she wheeled around then and faced the children's mother, a young woman in slacks, whose face was as JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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broad and innocent as a cabbage and was tied around with a green head-kerchief that had two points on the top like rabbit's ears. She was sitting on the sofa, feeding the baby his apricots out of a jar. "The children have been to Florida before," the old lady said. "You all ought to take them somewhere else for a change so they would see different parts of the world and be broad. They never have been to east Tennessee."

"I'd smack his face," John Wesley said.

The children's mother didn't seem to hear her but the eightyear-old boy, John Wesley, a stocky child with glasses, said, "If you don't want to go to Florida, why dontcha stay at home?" He and the little girl, June Star, were reading the funny papers on the floor.

The next morning the grandmother was the first one in the car, ready to go. She had her big black valise that looked like the head of a hippopotamus in one corner, and underneath it she was hiding a basket with Pitty Sing, the cat, in it. She didn't intend for the cat to be left alone in the house for three days because he would miss her too much and she was afraid he might brush against one of the gas burners and accidentally asphyxiate himself. Her son,

"She wouldn't stay at home to be queen for a day," June Star said without raising her yellow head. "Yes and what would you do if this fellow, The Misfit, caught you?" the grandmother asked.

"She wouldn't stay at home for a million bucks," June Star said. "Afraid she'd miss something. She has to go everywhere we go." "All right, Miss," the grandmother said. "Just remember that the next time you want me to curl your hair." June Star said her hair was naturally curly.

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Bailey, didn't like to arrive at a motel with a cat. She sat in the middle of the back seat with John Wesley and June Star on either side of her. Bailey and the children's mother and the baby sat in front and they left Atlanta at eight forty-five with the mileage on the car at 55890. The grandmother wrote this down because she thought it would be interesting to say how many miles they had been when they got back. It took them twenty minutes to reach the outskirts of the city. The old lady settled herself comfortably, removing her white cotton gloves and putting them up with her purse on the shelf in front of the back window. The children's mother still had on slacks and still had her head tied up in a green kerchief, but the grandmother had on a navy blue straw sailor hat with a bunch of white violets on the brim and a navy blue dress with a small white dot in the print. Her collars and

cuffs were white organdy trimmed with lace and at her neckline she had pinned a purple spray of cloth violets containing a sachet. In case of an accident, anyone seeing her dead on the highway would know at once that she was a lady. She said she thought it was going to be a good day for driving, neither too hot nor too cold, and she cautioned Bailey that the speed limit was fiftyfive miles an hour and that the patrolmen hid themselves behind billboards and small clumps of trees and sped out after you before you had a chance to slow down. She pointed out interesting details of the scenery: Stone Mountain; the blue granite that in some places came up to both sides of the highway; the brilliant red clay banks slightly streaked with purple; and the various crops that made rows of green lace-work on the ground. The trees were full of silver-white sunlight and the meanest of them sparkled. The JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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children were reading comic magazines and their mother had gone back to sleep. "Let's go through Georgia fast so we won't have to look at it much," John Wesley said. "If I were a little boy," said the grandmother, "I wouldn't talk about my native state that way. Tennessee has the mountains and Georgia has the hills." "Tennessee is just a hillbilly dumping ground," John Wesley said, "and Georgia is a lousy state too." "You said it," June Star said. "In my time," said the grandmother, folding her thin veined fingers, "children were more respectful of their native states and their parents and everything else. People did right then. Oh look at the cute little pickaninny!" she said and pointed to a Negro child standing in the door of a shack. "Wouldn't that make a picture, now?" she asked and they all turned and looked at the little

Negro out of the back window. He waved. "He didn't have any britches on," June Star said. "He probably didn't have any," the grandmother explained. "Little niggers in the country don't have things like we do. If I could paint, I'd paint that picture," she said. The children exchanged comic books. The grandmother offered to hold the baby and the children's mother passed him over the front seat to her. She set him on her knee and bounced him and told him about the things they were passing. She rolled her eyes and screwed up her mouth and stuck her leathery thin face into his smooth bland one. Occasionally he gave her a faraway smile. They passed a large cotton field with five or six graves fenced in the middle of it, like a small island. "Look at the graveyard!" the grandmother said, pointing it out. "That was the old family JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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burying ground. That belonged to the plantation." "Where's the plantation?" John Wesley asked. "Gone With the Wind," said the grandmother. "Ha. Ha." When the children finished all the comic books they had brought, they opened the lunch and ate it. The grandmother ate a peanut butter sandwich and an olive and would not let the children throw the box and the paper napkins out the window. When there was nothing else to do they played a game by choosing a cloud and making the other two guess what shape it suggested. John Wesley took one the shape of a cow and June Star guessed a cow and John Wesley said, no, an automobile, and June Star said he didn't play fair, and they began to slap each other over the grandmother. The grandmother said she would tell them a story if they would keep quiet. When she told a story, she rolled her eyes

and waved her head and was very dramatic. She said once when she was a maiden lady she had been courted by a Mr. Edgar Atkins Teagarden from Jasper, Georgia. She said he was a very good-looking man and a gentleman and that he brought her a watermelon every Saturday afternoon with his initials cut in it, E. A. T. Well, one Saturday, she said, Mr. Teagarden brought the watermelon and there was nobody at home and he left it on the front porch and returned in his buggy to Jasper, but she never got the watermelon, she said, because a nigger boy ate it when he saw the initials, E. A. T.! This story tickled John Wesley's funny bone and he giggled and giggled but June Star didn't think it was any good. She said she wouldn't marry a man that just brought her a watermelon on Saturday. The grandmother said she would have done well to marry Mr. Teagarden because he was a gentleman and had bought Coca-Cola stock when it first came out and that he had died JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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only a few years ago, a very wealthy man. They stopped at The Tower for barbecued sandwiches. The Tower was a part stucco and part wood filling station and dance hall set in a clearing outside of Timothy. A fat man named Red Sammy Butts ran it and there were signs stuck here and there on the building and for miles up and down the highway saying, TRY RED SAMMY'S FAMOUS BARBECUE. NONE LIKE FAMOUS RED SAMMY'S! RED SAM! THE FAT BOY WITH THE HAPPY LAUGH. A VETERAN! RED SAMMY'S YOUR MAN! Red Sammy was lying on the bare ground outside The Tower with his head under a truck while a gray monkey about a foot high, chained to a small chinaberry tree, chattered nearby. The monkey sprang back into the tree and got on the highest limb as soon as he saw the children jump out of the car and run toward him.

Inside, The Tower was a long dark room with a counter at one end and tables at the other and dancing space in the middle. They all sat down at a board table next to the nickelodeon and Red Sam's wife, a tall burnt-brown woman with hair and eyes lighter than her skin, came and took their order. The children's mother put a dime in the machine and played "The Tennessee Waltz," and the grandmother said that tune always made her want to dance. She asked Bailey if he would like to dance but he only glared at her. He didn't have a naturally sunny disposition like she did and trips made him nervous. The grandmother's brown eyes were very bright. She swayed her head from side to side and pretended she was dancing in her chair. June Star said play something she could tap to so the children's mother put in another dime and played a fast number and June Star stepped out onto the dance floor and did her tap routine.

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"Ain't she cute?" Red Sam's wife said, leaning over the counter. "Would you like to come be my little girl?" "No I certainly wouldn't," June Star said. "I wouldn't live in a broken-down place like this for a minion bucks!" and she ran back to the table. "Ain't she cute?" the woman repeated, stretching her mouth politely. "Arn't you ashamed?" hissed the grandmother. Red Sam came in and told his wife to quit lounging on the counter and hurry up with these people's order. His khaki trousers reached just to his hip bones and his stomach hung over them like a sack of meal swaying under his shirt. He came over and sat down at a table nearby and let out a combination sigh and yodel. "You can't win," he said. "You can't win," and he wiped his sweating red face off with a gray handkerchief. "These days

you don't know who to trust," he said. "Ain't that the truth?" "People are certainly not nice like they used to be," said the grandmother. "Two fellers come in here last week," Red Sammy said, "driving a Chrysler. It was a old beat-up car but it was a good one and these boys looked all right to me. Said they worked at the mill and you know I let them fellers charge the gas they bought? Now why did I do that?" "Because you're a good man!" the grandmother said at once. "Yes'm, I suppose so," Red Sam said as if he were struck with this answer. His wife brought the orders, carrying the five plates all at once without a tray, two in each hand and one balanced on her arm. "It isn't a soul in this green world of God's that you can trust," she said. "And I don't count nobody out of that, JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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not nobody," she repeated, looking at Red Sammy. "Did you read about that criminal, The Misfit, that's escaped?" asked the grandmother. "I wouldn't be a bit surprised if he didn't attact this place right here," said the woman. "If he hears about it being here,I wouldn't be none surprised to see him. If he hears it's two cent in the cash register, I wouldn't be a tall surprised if he . . ." "That'll do," Red Sam said. "Go bring these people their Co'-Colas," and the woman went off to get the rest of the order. "A good man is hard to find," Red Sammy said. "Everything is getting terrible. I remember the day you could go off and leave your screen door unlatched. Not no more." He and the grandmother discussed better times. The old lady said that in her opinion

Europe was entirely to blame for the way things were now. She said the way Europe acted you would think we were made of money and Red Sam said it was no use talking about it, she was exactly right. The children ran outside into the white sunlight and looked at the monkey in the lacy chinaberry tree. He was busy catching fleas on himself and biting each one carefully between his teeth as if it were a delicacy. They drove off again into the hot afternoon. The grandmother took cat naps and woke up every few minutes with her own snoring. Outside of Toombsboro she woke up and recalled an old plantation that she had visited in this neighborhood once when she was a young lady. She said the house had six white columns across the front and that there was an avenue of oaks leading up to it and two little wooden trellis arbors on either side in front where you sat down with your suitor after a stroll in the garden. She recalled exactly JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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which road to turn off to get to it. She knew that Bailey would not be willing to lose any time looking at an old house, but the more she talked about it, the more she wanted to see it once again and find out if the little twin arbors were still standing. "There was a secret panel in this house," she said craftily, not telling the truth but wishing that she were, "and the story went that all the family silver was hidden in it when Sherman came through but it was never found . . ."

wouldn't take over twenty minutes." Bailey was looking straight ahead. His jaw was as rigid as a horseshoe. "No," he said.

"Hey!" John Wesley said. "Let's go see it! We'll find it! We'll poke all the woodwork and find it! Who lives there? Where do you turn off at? Hey Pop, can't we turn off there?"

The children began to yell and scream that they wanted to see the house with the secret panel. John Wesley kicked the back of the front seat and June Star hung over her mother's shoulder and whined desperately into her ear that they never had any fun even on their vacation, that they could never do what THEY wanted to do. The baby began to scream and John Wesley kicked the back of the seat so hard that his father could feel the blows in his kidney.

"We never have seen a house with a secret panel!" June Star shrieked. "Let's go to the house with the secret panel! Hey Pop, can't we go see the house with the secret panel!"

"All right!" he shouted and drew the car to a stop at the side of the road. "Will you all shut up? Will you all just shut up for one second? If you don't shut up, we won't go anywhere.

"It's not far from here, I know," the grandmother said. "It

"It would be very educational for them," the grandmother murmured. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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"All right," Bailey said, "but get this: this is the only time we're going to stop for anything like this. This is the one and only time." "The dirt road that you have to turn down is about a mile back," the grandmother directed. "I marked it when we passed." "A dirt road," Bailey groaned. After they had turned around and were headed toward the dirt road, the grandmother recalled other points about the house, the beautiful glass over the front doorway and the candle-lamp in the hall. John Wesley said that the secret panel was probably in the fireplace. "You can't go inside this house," Bailey said. "You don't know who lives there." "While you all talk to the people in front, I'll run around behind and get in a window," John Wesley suggested.

"We'll all stay in the car," his mother said. They turned onto the dirt road and the car raced roughly along in a swirl of pink dust. The grandmother recalled the times when there were no paved roads and thirty miles was a day's journey. The dirt road was hilly and there were sudden washes in it and sharp curves on dangerous embankments. All at once they would be on a hill, looking down over the blue tops of trees for miles around, then the next minute, they would be in a red depression with the dustcoated trees looking down on them. "This place had better turn up in a minute," Bailey said, "or I'm going to turn around." The road looked as if no one had traveled on it in months. "It's not much farther," the grandmother said and just as she said it, a horrible thought came to her. The thought was so embarrassing that she turned red in the face and her eyes dilated and her feet jumped up, JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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upsetting her valise in the corner. The instant the valise moved, the newspaper top she had over the basket under it rose with a snarl and Pitty Sing,the cat, sprang onto Bailey's shoulder. The children were thrown to the floor and their mother, clutching the baby, was thrown out the door onto the ground; the old lady was thrown into the front seat. The car turned over once and landed rightside-up in a gulch off the side of the road. Bailey remained in the driver's seat with the catgray-striped with a broad white face and an orange noseclinging to his neck like a caterpillar. As soon as the children saw they could move their arms and legs, they scrambled out of the car, shouting, "We've had an ACCIDENT!" The grandmother was curled up under the dashboard, hoping she was injured so that Bailey's wrath would not come down on her all at once. The horrible

thought she had had before the accident was that the house she had remembered so vividly was not in Georgia but in Tennessee. Bailey removed the cat from his neck with both hands and flung it out the window against the side of a pine tree. Then he got out of the car and started looking for the children's mother. She was sitting against the side of the red gutted ditch, holding the screaming baby, but she only had a cut down her face and a broken shoulder. "We've had an ACCIDENT!" the children screamed in a frenzy of delight. "But nobody's killed," June Star said with disappointment as the grandmother limped out of the car, her hat still pinned to her head but the broken front brim standing up at a jaunty angle and the violet spray hanging off the side. They all sat down in the ditch, except the children, to recover from the shock. They were all shaking. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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"Maybe a car will come along," said the children's mother hoarsely. "I believe I have injured an organ," said the grandmother, pressing her side, but no one answered her. Bailey's teeth were clattering. He had on a yellow sport shirt with bright blue parrots designed in it and his face was as yellow as the l shirt. The grandmother decided that she would not mention that the house was in Tennessee. The road was about ten feet above and they could see only the tops of the trees on the other side of it. Behind the ditch they were sitting in there were more woods, tall and dark and deep. In a few minutes they saw a car some distance away on top of a hill, coming slowly as if the occupants were watching them. The grandmother stood up and waved both arms dramatically to attract their attention. The car continued to come on slowly, disappeared around a bend and appeared again,

moving even slower, on top of the hill they had gone over. It was a big black battered hearse-like automobile. There were three men in it. It came to a stop just over them and for some minutes, the driver looked down with a steady expressionless gaze to where they were sitting, and didn't speak. Then he turned his head and muttered something to the other two and they got out. One was a fat boy in black trousers and a red sweat shirt with a silver stallion embossed on the front of it. He moved around on the right side of them and stood staring, his mouth partly open in a kind of loose grin. The other had on khaki pants and a blue striped coat and a gray hat pulled down very low, hiding most of his face. He came around slowly on the left side. Neither spoke. The driver got out of the car and stood by the side of it, looking down at them. He was an older man than the other JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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two. His hair was just beginning to gray and he wore silver- rimmed spectacles that gave him a scholarly look. He had a long creased face and didn't have on any shirt or undershirt. He had on blue jeans that were too tight for him and was holding a black hat and a gun. The two boys also had guns. "We've had an ACCIDENT!" the children screamed. The grandmother had the peculiar feeling that the bespectacled man was someone she knew. His face was as familiar to her as if she had known him au her life but she could not recall who he was. He moved away from the car and began to come down the embankment, placing his feet carefully so that he wouldn't slip. He had on tan and white shoes and no socks, and his ankles were red and thin. "Good afternoon," he said. "I see you all had you a little spill."

"We turned over twice!" said the grandmother. "Once"," he corrected. "We seen it happen. Try their car and see will it run, Hiram," he said quietly to the boy with the gray hat. "What you got that gun for?" John Wesley asked. "Whatcha gonna do with that gun?" "Lady," the man said to the children's mother, "would you mind calling them children to sit down by you? Children make me nervous. I want all you all to sit down right together there where you're at." "What are you telling US what to do for?" June Star asked. Behind them the line of woods gaped like a dark open mouth. "Come here," said their mother. "Look here now," Bailey began suddenly, "we're in a predicament! We're in . . ." The grandmother shrieked. She scrambled to her feet and stood staring. "You're The Misfit!" JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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she said. "I recognized you at once!" "Yes'm," the man said, smiling slightly as if he were pleased in spite of himself to be known, "but it would have been better for all of you, lady, if you hadn't of reckernized me." Bailey turned his head sharply and said something to his mother that shocked even the children. The old lady began to cry and The Misfit reddened. "Lady," he said, "don't you get upset. Sometimes a man says things he don't mean. I don't reckon he meant to talk to you thataway." "You wouldn't shoot a lady, would you?" the grandmother said and removed a clean handkerchief from her cuff and began to slap at her eyes with it. The Misfit pointed the toe of his shoe into the ground and made a little hole and then covered it up again. "I would hate to have to," he said.

"Listen," the grandmother almost screamed, "I know you're a good man. You don't look a bit like you have common blood. I know you must come from nice people!" "Yes mam," he said, "finest people in the world." When he smiled he showed a row of strong white teeth. "God never made a finer woman than my mother and my daddy's heart was pure gold," he said. The boy with the red sweat shirt had come around behind them and was standing with his gun at his hip. The Misfit squatted down on the ground. "Watch them children, Bobby Lee," he said. "You know they make me nervous." He looked at the six of them huddled together in front of him and he seemed to be embarrassed as if he couldn't think of anything to say. "Ain't a cloud in the sky," he remarked, looking up at it. "Don't see no sun but don't see no cloud neither." "Yes, it's a beautiful day," said the grandmother. "Listen," she JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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said, "you shouldn't call yourself The Misfit because I know you're a good man at heart. I can just look at you and tell " "Hush!" Bailey yelled. "Hush! Everybody shut up and let me handle this!" He was squatting in the position of a runner about to sprint forward but he didn't move. "I prechate that, lady," The Misfit said and drew a little circle in the ground with the butt of his gun. "It'll take a half a hour to fix this here car," Hiram called, looking over the raised hood of it. "Well, first you and Bobby Lee get him and that little boy to step over yonder with you," The Misfit said, pointing to Bailey and John Wesley. "The boys want to ast you something," he said to Bailey. "Would you mind stepping back in them woods there with them?"

"Listen," Bailey began, "we're in a terrible predicament! Nobody realizes what this is," and his voice cracked. His eyes were as blue and intense as the parrots in his shirt and he remained perfectly still. The grandmother reached up to adjust her hat brim as if she were going to the woods with him but it came off in her hand. She stood staring at it and after a second she let it fall on the ground. Hiram pulled Bailey up by the arm as if he were assisting an old man. John Wesley caught hold of his father's hand and Bobby Lee followed. They went off toward the woods and just as they reached the dark edge, Bailey turned and supporting himself against a gray naked pine trunk, he shouted, "I'll be back in a minute, Mamma, wait on me!" "Come back this instant!" his mother shrilled but they all disappeared into the woods. "Bailey Boy!" the grandmother called in a tragic voice but she JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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found she was looking at The Misfit squatting on the ground in front of her. "I just know you're a good man," she said desperately. "You're not a bit common!" "Nome, I ain't a good man," The Misfit said after a second as if he had considered her statement carefully, "but I ain't the worst in the world neither. My daddy said I was a different breed of dog from my brothers and sisters. 'You know,' Daddy said, 'it's some that can live their whole life out without asking about it and it's others has to know why it is, and this boy is one of the latters. He's going to be into everything!'" He put on his black hat and looked up suddenly and then away deep into the woods as if he were embarrassed again. "I'm sorry I don't have on a shirt before you ladies," he said, hunching his shoulders slightly. "We buried our clothes that we had on when we escaped and we're just making do until we can get better. We borrowed these

from some folks we met," he explained. "That's perfectly all right," the grandmother said. "Maybe Bailey has an extra shirt in his suitcase." "I'll look and see terrectly," The Misfit said. "Where are they taking him?" the children's mother screamed. "Daddy was a card himself," The Misfit said. "You couldn't put anything over on him. He never got in trouble with the Authorities though. Just had the knack of handling them." "You could be honest too if you'd only try," said the grandmother. "Think how wonderful it would be to settle down and live a comfortable life and not have to think about somebody chasing you all the time." The Misfit kept scratching in the ground with the butt of his gun as if he were thinking about it. "Yes'm, somebody is JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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always after you," he murmured. The grandmother noticed how thin his shoulder blades were just behind-his hat because she was standing up looking down on him. "Do you ever pray?" she asked. He shook his head. All she saw was the black hat wiggle between his shoulder blades. "Nome," he said. There was a pistol shot from the woods, followed closely by another. Then silence. The old lady's head jerked around. She could hear the wind move through the tree tops like a long satisfied insuck of breath. "Bailey Boy!" she called. "I was a gospel singer for a while," The Misfit said. "I been most everything. Been in the arm service, both land and sea, at home and abroad, been twict married, been an undertaker, been with the railroads, plowed Mother Earth, been in a tornado, seen a man burnt alive oncet," and he looked up at the

children's mother and the little girl who were sitting close together, their faces white and their eyes glassy; "I even seen a woman flogged," he said. "Pray, pray," the grandmother began, "pray, pray . . ." "I never was a bad boy that I remember of," The Misfit said in an almost dreamy voice, "but somewheres along the line I done something wrong and got sent to the penitentiary. I was buried alive," and he looked up and held her attention to him by a steady stare. "That's when you should have started to pray," she said "What did you do to get sent to the penitentiary that first time?" "Turn to the right, it was a wall," The Misfit said, looking up again at the cloudless sky. "Turn to the left, it was a wall. Look up it was a ceiling, look down it was a floor. I forget what I done, lady. I set there and set there, trying to remember what it was I done JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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and I ain't recalled it to this day. Oncet in a while, I would think it was coming to me, but it never come." "Maybe they put you in by mistake," the old lady said vaguely. "Nome," he said. "It wasn't no mistake. They had the papers on me." "You must have stolen something," she said. The Misfit sneered slightly. "Nobody had nothing I wanted," he said. "It was a head-doctor at the penitentiary said what I had done was kill my daddy but I known that for a lie. My daddy died in nineteen ought nineteen of the epidemic flu and I never had a thing to do with it. He was buried in the Mount Hopewell Baptist churchyard and you can go there and see for yourself." "If you would pray," the old lady said, "Jesus would help you."

"That's right," The Misfit said. "Well then, why don't you pray?" she asked trembling with delight suddenly. "I don't want no hep," he said. "I'm doing all right by myself." Bobby Lee and Hiram came ambling back from the woods. Bobby Lee was dragging a yellow shirt with bright blue parrots in it. "Thow me that shirt, Bobby Lee," The Misfit said. The shirt came flying at him and landed on his shoulder and he put it on. The grandmother couldn't name what the shirt reminded her of. "No, lady," The Misfit said while he was buttoning it up, "I found out the crime don't matter. You can do one thing or you can do another, kill a man or take a tire off his car, because sooner or later you're going to forget what it was you done and just be punished for it." The children's mother had begun to make heaving noises JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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as if she couldn't get her breath. "Lady," he asked, "would you and that little girl like to step off yonder with Bobby Lee and Hiram and join your husband?" "Yes, thank you," the mother said faintly. Her left arm dangled helplessly and she was holding the baby, who had gone to sleep, in the other. "Hep that lady up, Hiram," The Misfit said as she struggled to climb out of the ditch, "and Bobby Lee, you hold onto that little girl's hand." "I don't want to hold hands with him," June Star said. "He reminds me of a pig." The fat boy blushed and laughed and caught her by the arm and pulled her off into the woods after Hiram and her mother. Alone with The Misfit, the grandmother found that she had lost her voice. There was not a cloud in the sky nor any sun. There was nothing around her but woods. She wanted to tell him that he must pray. She

opened and closed her mouth several times before anything came out. Finally she found herself saying, "Jesus. Jesus," meaning, Jesus will help you, but the way she was saying it, it sounded as if she might be cursing. "Yes'm," The Misfit said as if he agreed. "Jesus shown everything off balance. It was the same case with Him as with me except He hadn't committed any crime and they could prove I had committed one because they had the papers on me. Of course," he said, "they never shown me my papers. That's why I sign myself now. I said long ago, you get you a signature and sign everything you do and keep a copy of it. Then you'll know what you done and you can hold up the crime to the punishment and see do they match and in the end you'll have something to prove you ain't been treated right. I call myself The Misfit," he said, "because I can't make what all I done wrong fit what JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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all I gone through in punishment." There was a piercing scream from the woods, followed closely by a pistol report. "Does it seem right to you, lady, that one is punished a heap and another ain't punished at all?" "Jesus!" the old lady cried. "You've got good blood! I know you wouldn't shoot a lady! I know you come from nice people! Pray! Jesus, you ought not to shoot a lady. I'll give you all the money I've got!" "Lady," The Misfit said, looking beyond her far into the woods, "there never was a body that give the undertaker a tip." There were two more pistol reports and the grandmother raised her head like a parched old turkey hen crying for water and called, "Bailey Boy, Bailey Boy!" as if her heart would break.

"Jesus was the only One that ever raised the dead," The Misfit continued, "and He shouldn't have done it. He shown everything off balance. If He did what He said, then it's nothing for you to do but thow away everything and follow Him, and if He didn't, then it's nothing for you to do but enjoy the few minutes you got left the best way you can-by killing somebody or burning down his house or doing some other meanness to him. No pleasure but meanness," he said and his voice had become almost a snarl. "Maybe He didn't raise the dead," the old lady mumbled, not knowing what she was saying and feeling so dizzy that she sank down in the ditch with her legs twisted under her. "I wasn't there so I can't say He didn't," The Misfit said. "I wisht I had of been there," he said, hitting the ground with his fist. "It ain't right I wasn't there because if I had of been there I would of known. Listen JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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lady," he said in a high voice, "if I had of been there I would of known and I wouldn't be like I am now." His voice seemed about to crack and the grandmother's head cleared for an instant. She saw the man's face twisted close to her own as if he were going to cry and she murmured, "Why you're one of my babies. You're one of my own children!" She reached out and touched him on the shoulder. The Misfit sprang back as if a snake had bitten him and shot her three times through the chest. Then he put his gun down on the ground and took off his glasses and began to clean them. Hiram and Bobby Lee returned from the woods and stood over the ditch, looking down at the grandmother who half sat and half lay in a puddle of blood with her legs crossed under her like a child's and her face smiling up at the cloudless sky. Without his glasses, The Misfit's eyes were red-rimmed and pale and defenseless-

looking. "Take her off and thow her where you shown the others," he said, picking up the cat that was rubbing itself against his leg. "She was a talker, wasn't she?" Bobby Lee said, sliding down the ditch with a yodel. "She would of been a good woman," The Misfit said, "if it had been somebody there to shoot her every minute of her life." "Some fun!" Bobby Lee said. "Shut up, Bobby Lee" The Misfit said. "It's no real pleasure in life."

THE SNOWS OF KILIMANJARO BY E

This short story -- written in 1938 -- reflects several of Hemingway's personal JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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concerns during the 1930s regarding his existence as a writer and his life in general. Hemingway remarked in Green Hills that "politics, women, drink, money and ambition" damage American writers. His fear that his own acquaintances with rich people might harm his integrity as a writer becomes evident in this story. The text in italics also reveals Hemingway's fear of leaving his own work of life unfinished. In broader terms, The Snows of Kilimanjaro should be viewed as an example of an author of the "Lost Generation", who experienced the world wars and the war in Spain, which led them to question moral and philosophy. Hemingway, in particular, found himself in a moral vacuum when he felt alienated from the church, which was closely affiliated with Franco in Spain, and which he felt obliged to distance himself from. As a result, he came up with his own code of human conduct: a

mixture of hedonism and sentimental humanism.

THE MARVELLOUS THING IS THAT ITâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S painless," he said. "That's how you know when it starts." "Is it really?" "Absolutely. I'm awfully sorry about the odor though. That must bother you." "Don't! Please don't." "Look at them," he said. "Now is it sight or is it scent that brings them like that?" The cot the man lay on was in the wide shade of a mimosa tree and as he looked out past the shade onto the glare of the plain there were three of the big birds squatted obscenely, while in the sky a dozen more sailed, making quick-moving shadows as they passed.

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"They've been there since the day the truck broke down," he said. "Today's the first time any have lit on the ground. I watched the way they sailed very carefully at first in case I ever wanted to use them in a story. That's funny now.""I wish you wouldn't," she said. "I'm only talking," he said. "It's much easier if I talk. But I don't want to bother you." "You know it doesn't bother me," she said. "It's that I've gotten so very nervous not being able to do anything. I think we might make it as easy as we can until the plane comes." "Or until the plane doesn't come." "Please tell me what I can do. There must be something I can do. "You can take the leg off and that might stop it, though I doubt it. Or you can shoot me. You're a good shot now. I taught you to shoot, didn't I?"

"Please don't talk that way. Couldn't I read to you?" "Read what?" "Anything in the book that we haven't read." "I can't listen to it," he said." Talking is the easiest. We quarrel and that makes the time pass." "I don't quarrel. I never want to quarrel. Let's not quarrel any more. No matter how nervous we get. Maybe they will be back with another truck today. Maybe the plane will come." "I don't want to move," the man said. "There is no sense in moving now except to make it easier for you." "That's cowardly." "Can't you let a man die as comfortably as he can without calling him names? What's the use of clanging me?" "You're not going to die."

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"Don't be silly. I'm dying now. Ask those bastards." He looked over to where the huge, filthy birds sat, their naked heads sunk in the hunched feathers. A fourth planed down, to run quick-legged and then waddle slowly toward the others.

a nearly dry water hole where sand grouse flighted in the mornings. "Wouldn't you like me to read?" she asked. She was sitting on a canvas chair beside his cot. "There's a breeze coming up.

"They are around every camp. You never notice them. You can't die if you don't give up."

"No thanks."

"Where did you read that? You're such a bloody fool."

"I don't give a damn about the truck."

"You might think about some one else."

"I do."

"For Christ's sake," he said, "that's been my trade." He lay then and was quiet for a while and looked across the heat shimmer of the plain to the edge of the bush. There were a few Tommies that showed minute and white against the yellow and, far off, he saw a herd of zebra, white against the green of the bush. This was a pleasant camp under big trees against a hill, with good water, and close by,

"Maybe the truck will come."

"You give a damn about so many things that I don't." "Not so many, Harry." "What about a drink?" "It's supposed to be bad for you. It said in Black's to avoid all alcohol. You shouldn't drink." "Molo!" he shouted. "Yes Bwana." JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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"Bring whiskey-soda." "Yes Bwana." "You shouldn't," she said. "That's what I mean by giving up. It says it's bad for you. I know it's bad for you." "No," he said. "It's good for me." So now it was all over, he thought. So now he would never have a chance to finish it. So this was the way it ended, in a bickering over a drink. Since the gangrene started in his right leg he had no pain and with the pain the horror had gone and all he felt now was a great tiredness and anger that this was the end of it. For this, that now was coming, he had very little curiosity.

For years it had obsessed him; but now it meant nothing in itself. It was strange how easy being tired enough made it. Now he would never write the things that he had saved to write until he knew enough to write them well. Well, he would not have to fail at trying to write them either. Maybe you could never write them, and that was why you put them off and delayed the starting. Well he would never know, now. "I wish we'd never come," the woman said. She was looking at him holding the glass and biting her lip. "You never would have gotten anything like this in Paris. You always said you loved Paris. We could have stayed in Paris or gone anywhere. I'd have gone anywhere. I said I'd go anywhere you wanted. If you wanted to shoot we could have gone shooting in Hungary and been comfortable." JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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"Your bloody money," he said. "That's not fair," she said. "It was always yours as much as mine. I left everything and I went wherever you wanted to go and I've done what you wanted to do But I wish we'd never come here." "You said you loved it." "I did when you were all right. But now I hate it. I don't see why that had to happen to your leg. What have we done to have that happen to us?" "I suppose what I did was to forget to put iodine on it when I first scratched it. Then I didn't pay any attention to it because I never infect. Then, later, when it got bad, it was probably using that weak carbolic solution when the other antiseptics ran out that paralyzed the minute blood vessels and started the gangrene." He looked at her, "What else'" "I don't mean that."

"If we would have hired a good mechanic instead of a halfbaked Kikuyu driver, he would have checked the oil and never burned out that bearing in the truck." "I don't mean that." "If you hadn't left your own people, your goddamned Old Westbury Saratoga, Palm Beach people to take me on " *'Why, I loved you. That's not fair. I love you now. I'll always love you Don't you love me?" "No," said the man. "I don't think so. I never have." "Harry, what are you saying? You're out of your head." "No. I haven't any head to go out of." "Don't drink that," she said. "Darling, please don't drink that. We have to do everything we can." "You do it," he said. "I'm tired."

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Now in his mind he saw a railway station at Karagatch and he was standing with his pack and that was the headlight of the Simplon-Offent cutting the dark now and he was leaving Thrace then after the retreat. That was one of the things he had saved to write, with, in the morning at breakfast, looking out the window and seeing snow on the mountains in Bulgaffa and Nansen's Secretary asking the old man if it were snow and the old man looking at it and saying, No, that's not snow. It's too early for snow. And the Secretary repeating to the other girls, No, you see. It's not snow and them all saying, It's not snow we were mistaken. But it was the snow all right and he sent them on into it when he evolved exchange of populations. And it was snow they tramped along in until they died that winter. It was snow too that fell all Christmas week that year up in the Gauertal, that year they lived in the woodcutter's house

with the big square porcelain stove that filled half the room, and they slept on mattresses filled with beech leaves, the time the deserter came with his feet bloody in the snow. He said the police were right behind him and they gave him woolen socks and held the gendarmes talking until the tracks had drifted over. In Schrunz, on Christmas day, the snow was so bright it hurt your eyes when you looked out from the Weinstube and saw every one coming home from church. That was where they walked up the sleigh-smoothed urine-yellowed road along the river with the steep pine hills, skis heavy on the shoulder, and where they ran down the glacier above the Madlenerhaus, the snow as smooth to see as cake frosting and as light as powder and he remembered the noiseless rush the speed made as you dropped down like a bird. They were snow-bound a week in the Madlenerhaus that time JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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in the blizzard playing cards in the smoke by the lantern light and the stakes were higher all the time as Herr Lent lost more. Finally he lost it all. Everything, the Skischule money and all the season's profit and then his capital. He could see him with his long nose, picking up the cards and then opening, "Sans Voir." There was always gambling then. When there was no snow you gambled and when there was too much you gambled. He thought of all the time in his life he had spent gambling.

somebody saying, ''You bloody murderous bastard.''

But he had never written a line of that, nor of that cold, bright Christmas day with the mountains showing across the plain that Barker had flown across the lines to bomb the Austrian officers' leave train, machine-gunning them as they scattered and ran. He remembered Barker afterwards coming into the mess and starting to tell about it. And how quiet it got and then

How many winters had he lived in the Vorarlberg and the Arlberg? It was four and then he remembered the man who had the fox to sell when they had walked into Bludenz, that time to buy presents, and the cherry-pit taste of good kirsch, the fast-slipping rush of running powder-snow on crust, singing ''Hi! Ho! said Rolly!' ' as you ran down the last stretch to the steep drop, taking it straight, then running the

Those were the same Austrians they killed then that he skied with later. No not the same. Hans, that he skied with all that year, had been in the Kaiser Jagers and when they went hunting hares together up the little valley above the sawmill they had talked of the fighting on Pasubio and of the attack on Perticara and Asalone and he had never written a word of that. Nor of Monte Corona, nor the Sette Communi, nor of Arsiero.

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orchard in three turns and out across the ditch and onto the icy road behind the inn. Knocking your bindings loose, kicking the skis free and leaning them up against the wooden wall of the inn, the lamplight coming from the window, where inside, in the smoky, new-wine smelling warmth, they were playing the accordion.

"If you have to go away," she said, "is it absolutely necessary to kill off everything you leave behind? I mean do you have to take away everything? Do you have to kill your horse, and your wife and burn your saddle and your armour?"

"Where did we stay in Paris?" he asked the woman who was sitting by him in a canvas chair, now, in Africa.

"Don't."

"At the Crillon. You know that." "Why do I know that?" "That's where we always stayed." "No. Not always." "There and at the Pavillion Henri-Quatre in St. Germain. You said you loved it there." "Love is a dunghill," said Harry. "And I'm the cock that gets on it to crow."

"Yes," he said. "Your damned money was my armour. My Sword and my Armour."

"All right. I'll stop that. I don't want to hurt you.' "It's a little bit late now." "All right then. I'll go on hurting you. It's more amusing. The only thing I ever really liked to do with you I can't do now." "No, that's not true. You liked to do many things and everything you wanted to do I did." "Oh, for Christ sake stop bragging, will you?"

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He looked at her and saw her crying. "Listen," he said. "Do you think that it is fun to do this? I don't know why I'm doing it. It's trying to kill to keep yourself alive, I imagine. I was all right when we started talking. I didn't mean to start this, and now I'm crazy as a coot and being as cruel to you as I can be. Don't pay any attention, darling, to what I say. I love you, really. You know I love you. I've never loved any one else the way I love you." He slipped into the familiar lie he made his bread and butter by. "You're sweet to me." "You bitch," he said. "You rich bitch. That's poetry. I'm full of poetry now. Rot and poetry. Rotten poetry." "Stop it. Harry, why do you have to turn into a devil now?"

"I don't like to leave anything," the man said. "I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t like to leave things behind." *** It was evening now and he had been asleep. The sun was gone behind the hill and there was a shadow all across the plain and the small animals were feeding close to camp; quick dropping heads and switching tails, he watched them keeping well out away from the bush now. The birds no longer waited on the ground. They were all perched heavily in a tree. There were many more of them. His personal boy was sitting by the bed. "Memsahib's gone to shoot," the boy said. "Does Bwana want?" "Nothing." She had gone to kill a piece of meat and, knowing how he liked to watch the game, she had gone well away so she would not disturb this little pocket of the plain that he JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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could see. She was always thoughtful, he thought. On anything she knew about, or had read, or that she had ever heard. It was not her fault that when he went to her he was already over. How could a woman know that you meant nothing that you said; that you spoke only from habit and to be comfortable? After he no longer meant what he said, his lies were more successful with women than when he had told them the truth. It was not so much that he lied as that there was no truth to tell. He had had his life and it was over and then he went on living it again with different people and more money, with the best of the same places, and some new ones. You kept from thinking and it was all marvellous. You were equipped with good insides so that you did not go to pieces that way, the way most of them had, and you made an attitude that you cared nothing for the

work you used to do, now that you could no longer do it. But, in yourself, you said that you would write about these people; about the very rich; that you were really not of them but a spy in their country; that you would leave it and write of it and for once it would be written by some one who knew what he was writing of. But he would never do it, because each day of not writing, of comfort, of being that which he despised, dulled his ability and softened his will to work so that, finally, he did no work at all. The people he knew now were all much more comfortable when he did not work. Africa was where he had been happiest in the good time of his life, so he had come out here to start again. They had made this safari with the minimum of comfort. There was no hardship; but there was no luxury and he had thought that he could get back into training that way. That in some way he could work the fat off his soul the way a fighter went into the mountains to work and JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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train in order to burn it out of his body. She had liked it. She said she loved it. She loved anything that was exciting, that involved a change of scene, where there were new people and where things were pleasant. And he had felt the illusion of returning strength of will to work. Now if this was how it ended, and he knew it was, he must not turn like some snake biting itself because its back was broken. It wasn't this woman's fault. If it had not been she it would have been another. If he lived by a lie he should try to die by it. He heard a shot beyond the hill. She shot very well this good, this rich bitch, this kindly caretaker and destroyer of his talent. Nonsense. He had destroyed his talent himself. Why should he blame this woman because she kept him well? He had destroyed his talent by not using it, by betrayals of himself and what he believed in, by drinking so

much that he blunted the edge of his perceptions, by laziness, by sloth, and by snobbery, by pride and by prejudice, by hook and by crook. What was this? A catalogue of old books? What was his talent anyway? It was a talent all right but instead of using it, he had traded on it. It was never what he had done, but always what he could do. And he had chosen to make his living with something else instead of a pen or a pencil. It was strange, too, wasn't it, that when he fell in love with another woman, that woman should always have more money than the last one? But when he no longer was in love, when he was only lying, as to this woman, now, who had the most money of all, who had all the money there was, who had had a husband and children, who had taken lovers and been dissatisfied with them, and who loved him dearly as a writer, as a man, as a companion and as a proud possession; it was strange that when he did not love her at all and was lying, that he should JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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be able to give her more for her money than when he had really loved. We must all be cut out for what we do, he thought. However you make your living is where your talent lies. He had sold vitality, in one form or another, all his life and when your affections are not too involved you give much better value for the money. He had found that out but he would never write that, now, either. No, he would not write that, although it was well worth writing. Now she came in sight, walking across the open toward the camp. She was wearing jodphurs and carrying her rifle. The two boys had a Tommie slung and they were coming along behind her. She was still a good-looking woman, he thought, and she had a pleasant body. She had a great talent and appreciation for the bed, she was not pretty, but he liked her face, she read enormously, liked to ride and shoot and, certainly, she drank too much.

Her husband had died when she was still a comparatively young woman and for a while she had devoted herself to her two just-grown children, who did not need her and were embarrassed at having her about, to her stable of horses, to books, and to bottles. She liked to read in the evening before dinner and she drank Scotch and soda while she read. By dinner she was fairly drunk and after a bottle of wine at dinner she was usually drunk enough to sleep. That was before the lovers. After she had the lovers she did not drink so much because she did not have to be drunk to sleep. But the lovers bored her. She had been married to a man who had never bored her and these people bored her very much. Then one of her two children was killed in a plane crash and after that was over she did not want the lovers, and drink being no anaesthetic she had to make another life. Suddenly, JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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she had been acutely frightened of being alone. But she wanted some one that she respected with her. It had begun very simply. She liked what he wrote and she had always envied the life he led. She thought he did exactly what he wanted to. The steps by which she had acquired him and the way in which she had finally fallen in love with him were all part of a regular progression in which she had built herself a new life and he had traded away what remained of his old life. He had traded it for security, for comfort too, there was no denying that, and for what else? He did not know. She would have bought him anything he wanted. He knew that. She was a damned nice woman too. He would as soon be in bed with her as any one; rather with her, because she was richer, because she was very pleasant and appreciative and because she never made scenes. And now this life that

she had built again was coming to a term because he had not used iodine two weeks ago when a thorn had scratched his knee as they moved forward trying to photograph a herd of waterbuck standing, their heads up, peering while their nostrils searched the air, their ears spread wide to hear the first noise that would send them rushing into the bush. They had bolted, too, before he got the picture. Here she came now. He turned his head on the cot to look toward her. "Hello," he said. "I shot a Tommy ram," she told him. "He'll make you good broth and I'll have them mash some potatoes with the Klim. How do you feel?" "Much better." "Isn't that lovely? You know I thought perhaps you would. You were sleeping when I left." "I had a good sleep. Did you walk far?" JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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"No. Just around behind the hill. I made quite a good shot on the Tommy." "You shoot marvellously, you know." "I love it. I've loved Africa. Really. If you're all right it's the most fun that I've ever had. You don't know the fun it's been to shoot with you. I've loved the country." "I love it too." "Darling, you don't know how marvellous it is to see you feeling better. I couldn't stand it when you felt that way. You won't talk to me like that again, will you? Promise me?" "No," he said. "I don't remember what I said." "You don't have to destroy me. Do you? I'm only a middleaged woman who loves you and wants to do what you want to do. I've been destroyed two or three times already. You wouldn't want to destroy me again, would you?"

"I'd like to destroy you a few times in bed," he said. "Yes. That's the good destruction. That's the way we're made to be destroyed. The plane will be here tomorrow." "How do you know?" "I'm sure. It's bound to come. The boys have the wood all ready and the grass to make the smudge. I went down and looked at it again today. There's plenty of room to land and we have the smudges ready at both ends." "What makes you think it will come tomorrow?" "I'm sure it will. It's overdue now. Then, in town, they will fix up your leg and then we will have some good destruction. Not that dreadful talking kind." "Should we have a drink? The sun is down." "Do you think you should?" JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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"I'm having one." "We'll have one together. Molo, letti dui whiskey-soda!" she called. "You'd better put on your mosquito boots," he told her. "I'll wait till I bathe . . ." While it grew dark they drank and just before it was dark and there was no longer enough light to shoot, a hyena crossed the open on his way around the hill. "That bastard crosses there every night," the man said. "Every night for two weeks." "He's the one makes the noise at night. I don't mind it. They're a filthy animal though." Drinking together, with no pain now except the discomfort of lying in the one position, the boys lighting a fire, its shadow jumping on the tents, he could feel the return of acquiescence in this life of pleasant surrender. She was very good to him. He had been cruel and

unjust in the afternoon. She was a fine woman, marvellous really. And just then it occurred to him that he was going to die. It came with a rush; not as a rush of water nor of wind; but of a sudden, evil-smelling emptiness and the odd thing was that the hyena slipped lightly along the edge of it. "What is it, Harry?" she asked him. "Nothing," he said. "You had better move over to the other side. To windward." "Did Molo change the dressing?" "Yes. I'm just using the boric now." "How do you feel?" "A little wobbly." "I'm going in to bathe," she said. "I'll be right out. I'll eat with you and then we'll put the cot in." JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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So, he said to himself, we did well to stop the quarrelling. He had never quarrelled much with this woman, while with the women that he loved he had quarrelled so much they had finally, always, with the corrosion of the quarrelling, killed what they had together. He had loved too much, demanded too much, and he wore it all out. He thought about alone in Constantinople that time, having quarrelled in Paris before he had gone out. He had whored the whole time and then, when that was over, and he had failed to kill his loneliness, but only made it worse, he had written her, the first one, the one who left him, a letter telling her how he had never been able to kill it ... How when he thought he saw her outside the Regence one time it made him go all faint and sick inside, and that he would follow a woman who looked like her in some way, along the Boulevard, afraid to see it was not she, afraid to

lose the feeling it gave him. How every one he had slept with had only made him miss her more. How what she had done could never matter since he knew he could not cure himself of loving her. He wrote this letter at the Club, cold sober, and mailed it to New York asking her to write him at the of fice in Paris. That seemed safe. And that night missing her so much it made him feel hollow sick inside, he wandered up past Maxim's, picked a girl up and took her out to supper. He had gone to a place to dance with her afterward, she danced badly, and left her for a hot Armenian slut, that swung her belly against him so it almost scalded. He took her away from a British gunner subaltern after a row. The gunner asked him outside and they fought in the street on the cobbles in the dark. He'd hit him twice, hard, on the side of the jaw and when he didn't go down he knew he was in for a fight. The gunner hit him in the body, then beside his eye. He JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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swung with his left again and landed and the gunner fell on him and grabbed his coat and tore the sleeve off and he clubbed him twice behind the ear and then smashed him with his right as he pushed him away. When the gunner went down his head hit first and he ran with the girl because they heard the M.P. 's coming. They got into a taxi and drove out to Rimmily Hissa along the Bosphorus, and around, and back in the cool night and went to bed and she felt as over-ripe as she looked but smooth, rosepetal, syrupy, smooth-bellied, big-breasted and needed no pillow under her buttocks, and he left her before she was awake looking blousy enough in the first daylight and turned up at the Pera Palace with a black eye, carrying his coat because one sleeve was missing. That same night he left for Anatolia and he remembered, later on that trip, riding all day through fields of the poppies that they raised for opium and

how strange it made you feel, finally, and all the distances seemed wrong, to where they had made the attack with the newly arrived Constantine officers, that did not know a god-damned thing, and the artillery had fired into the troops and the British observer had cried like a child. That was the day he'd first seen dead men wearing white ballet skirts and upturned shoes with pompons on them. The Turks had come steadily and lumpily and he had seen the skirted men running and the of ficers shooting into them and running then themselves and he and the British observer had run too until his lungs ached and his mouth was full of the taste of pennies and they stopped behind some rocks and there were the Turks coming as lumpily as ever. Later he had seen the things that he could never think of and later still he had seen much worse. So when he got back to Paris that time he could not talk about it or stand to have it mentioned. And JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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there in the cafe as he passed was that American poet with a pile of saucers in front of him and a stupid look on his potato face talking about the Dada movement with a Roumanian who said his name was Tristan Tzara, who always wore a monocle and had a headache, and, back at the apartment with his wife that now he loved again, the quarrel all over, the madness all over, glad to be home, the office sent his mail up to the flat. So then the letter in answer to the one he'd written came in on a platter one morning and when he saw the hand writing he went cold all over and tried to slip the letter underneath another. But his wife said, ''Who is that letter from, dear?'' and that was the end of the beginning of that. He remembered the good times with them all, and the quarrels. They always picked the finest places to have the quarrels. And why had they always quarrelled when he was feeling best? He had never written any

of that because, at first, he never wanted to hurt any one and then it seemed as though there was enough to write without it. But he had always thought that he would write it finally. There was so much to write. He had seen the world change; not just the events; although he had seen many of them and had watched the people, but he had seen the subtler change and he could remember how the people were at different times. He had been in it and he had watched it and it was his duty to write of it; but now he never would. "How do you feel?" she said. She had come out from the tent now after her bath. "All right." "Could you eat now?" He saw Molo behind her with the folding table and the other boy with the dishes. "I want to write," he said. "You ought to take some broth to keep your strength up." JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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"I'm going to die tonight," he said. "I don't need my strength up." "Don't be melodramatic, Harry, please," she said. "Why don't you use your nose? I'm rotted half way up my thigh now. What the hell should I fool with broth for? Molo bring whiskey-soda." "Please take the broth," she said gently. "All right." The broth was too hot. He had to hold it in the cup until it cooled enough to take it and then he just got it down without gagging. "You're a fine woman," he said. "Don't pay any attention to me." She looked at him with her well-known, well-loved face from Spur and Town & Country, only a little the worse for drink, only a little the worse for bed, but Town & Country never showed those

good breasts and those useful thighs and those lightly smallof-back-caressing hands, and as he looked and saw her wellknown pleasant smile, he felt death come again. in. This time there was no rush. It was a puff, as of a wind that makes a candle flicker and the flame go tall. "They can bring my net out later and hang it from the tree and build the fire up. I'm not going in the tent tonight. It's not worth moving. It's a clear night. There won't be any rain." So this was how you died, in whispers that you did not hear. Well, there would be no more quarrelling. He could promise that. The one experience that he had never had he was not going to spoil now. He probably would. You spoiled everything. But perhaps he wouldn't. "You can't take dictation, can you?" JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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"I never learned," she told him. "That's all right." There wasn't time, of course, although it seemed as though it telescoped so that you might put it all into one paragraph if you could get it right. There was a log house, chinked white with mortar, on a hill above the lake. There was a bell on a pole by the door to call the people in to meals. Behind the house were fields and behind the fields was the timber. A line of lombardy poplars ran from the house to the dock. Other poplars ran along the point. A road went up to the hills along the edge of the timber and along that road he picked blackberries. Then that log house was burned down and all the guns that had been on deer foot racks above the open fire place were burned and afterwards their barrels, with the lead melted in the magazines, and the stocks burned away, lay out on the heap of ashes that were used to make lye for the big iron soap

kettles, and you asked Grandfather if you could have them to play with, and he said, no. You see they were his guns still and he never bought any others. Nor did he hunt any more. The house was rebuilt in the same place out of lumber now and painted white and from its porch you saw the poplars and the lake beyond; but there were never any more guns. The barrels of the guns that had hung on the deer feet on the wall of the log house lay out there on the heap of ashes and no one ever touched them. In the Black Forest, after the war, we rented a trout stream and there were two ways to walk to it. One was down the valley from Triberg and around the valley road in the shade of the trees that bordered the white road, and then up a side road that went up through the hills past many small farms, with the big Schwarzwald houses, until that road crossed the stream. That was where our fishing began. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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The other way was to climb steeply up to the edge of the woods and then go across the top of the hills through the pine woods, and then out to the edge of a meadow and down across this meadow to the bridge. There were birches along the stream and it was not big, but narrow, clear and fast, with pools where it had cut under the roots of the birches. At the Hotel in Triberg the proprietor had a fine season. It was very pleasant and we were all great friends. The next year came the inflation and the money he had made the year before was not enough to buy supplies to open the hotel and he hanged himself. You could dictate that, but you could not dictate the Place Contrescarpe where the flower sellers dyed their flowers in the street and the dye ran over the paving where the autobus started and the old men and the women, always drunk on wine and bad mare; and the children with their noses running in the cold; the smell of dirty sweat and poverty and drunkenness at the

Cafe' des Amateurs and the whores at the Bal Musette they lived above. The concierge who entertained the trooper of the Garde Republicaine in her loge, his horse-hair-plumed helmet on a chair. The locataire across the hall whose husband was a bicycle racer and her joy that morning at the cremerie when she had opened L'Auto and seen where he placed third in Paris-Tours, his first big race. She had blushed and laughed and then gone upstairs crying with the yellow sporting paper in her hand. The husband of the woman who ran the Bal Musette drove a taxi and when he, Harry, had to take an early plane the husband knocked upon the door to wake him and they each drank a glass of white wine at the zinc of the bar before they started. He knew his neighbors in that quarter then because they all were poor. Around that Place there were two kinds; the drunkards and the sportifs. The drunkards JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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killed their poverty that way; the sportifs took it out in exercise. They were the descendants of the Communards and it was no struggle for them to know their politics. They knew who had shot their fathers, their relatives, their brothers, and their friends when the Versailles troops came in and took the town after the Commune and executed any one they could catch with calloused hands, or who wore a cap, or carried any other sign he was a working man. And in that poverty, and in that quarter across the street from a Boucherie Chevaline and a wine cooperative he had written the start of all he was to do. There never was another part of Paris that he loved like that, the sprawling trees, the old white plastered houses painted brown below, the long green of the autobus in that round square, the purple flower dye upon the paving, the sudden drop down the hill of the rue Cardinal Lemoine to the River, and the other way

the narrow crowded world of the rue Mouffetard. The street that ran up toward the Pantheon and the other that he always took with the bicycle, the only asphalted street in all that quarter, smooth under the tires, with the high narrow houses and the cheap tall hotel where Paul Verlaine had died. There were only two rooms in the apartments where they lived and he had a room on the top floor of that hotel that cost him sixty francs a month where he did his writing, and from it he could see the roofs and chimney pots and all the hills of Paris. From the apartment you could only see the wood and coal man's place. He sold wine too, bad wine. The golden horse's head outside the Boucherie Chevaline where the carcasses hung yellow gold and red in the open window, and the green painted co-operative where they bought their wine; good wine and cheap. The rest was plaster walls and the windows of the neighbors. The JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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neighbors who, at night, when some one lay drunk in the street, moaning and groaning in that typical French ivresse that you were propaganded to believe did not exist, would open their windows and then the murmur of talk. ''Where is the policeman? When you don't want him the bugger is always there. He's sleeping with some concierge. Get the Agent. " Till some one threw a bucket of water from a window and the moaning stopped. ''What's that? Water. Ah, that's intelligent." And the windows shutting. Marie, his femme de menage, protesting against the eight-hour day saying, ''If a husband works until six he gets only a riffle drunk on the way home and does not waste too much. If he works only until five he is drunk every night and one has no money. It is the wife of the working man who suffers from this shortening of hours. '

"Wouldn't you like some more broth?" the woman asked him now. "No, thank you very much. It is awfully good." "Try just a little." "I would like a whiskey-soda." "It's not good for you." "No. It's bad for me. Cole Porter wrote the words and the music. This knowledge that you're going mad for me." "You know I like you to drink." "Oh yes. Only it's bad for me." When she goes, he thought, I'll have all I want. Not all I want but all there is. Ayee he was tired. Too tired. He was going to sleep a little while. He lay still and death was not there. It must have gone around another street. It went in pairs, on bicycles, and moved absolutely silently on the pavements.

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No, he had never written about Paris. Not the Paris that he cared about. But what about the rest that he had never written? What about the ranch and the silvered gray of the sage brush, the quick, clear water in the irrigation ditches, and the heavy green of the alfalfa. The trail went up into the hills and the cattle in the summer were shy as deer. The bawling and the steady noise and slow moving mass raising a dust as you brought them down in the fall. And behind the mountains, the clear sharpness of the peak in the evening light and, riding down along the trail in the moonlight, bright across the valley. Now he remembered coming down through the timber in the dark holding the horse's tail when you could not see and all the stories that he meant to write. About the half-wit chore boy who was left at the ranch that time and told not to let any one get any hay, and that old

bastard from the Forks who had beaten the boy when he had worked for him stopping to get some feed. The boy refusing and the old man saying he would beat him again. The boy got the rifle from the kitchen and shot him when he tried to come into the barn and when they came back to the ranch he'd been dead a week, frozen in the corral, and the dogs had eaten part of him. But what was left you packed on a sled wrapped in a blanket and roped on and you got the boy to help you haul it, and the two of you took it out over the road on skis, and sixty miles down to town to turn the boy over. He having no idea that he would be arrested. Thinking he had done his duty and that you were his friend and he would be rewarded. He'd helped to haul the old man in so everybody could know how bad the old man had been and how he'd tried to steal some feed that didn't belong to him, and when the sheriff put the handcuffs on the boy he couldn't believe it. Then he'd JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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started to cry. That was one story he had saved to write. He knew at least twenty good stories from out there and he had never written one. Why? "You tell them why," he said. "Why what, dear?" "Why nothing." She didn't drink so much, now, since she had him. But if he lived he would never write about her, he knew that now. Nor about any of them. The rich were dull and they drank too much, or they played too much backgammon. They were dull and they were repetitious. He remembered poor Julian and his romantic awe of them and how he had started a story once that began, "The very rich are different from you and me." And how some one had said to Julian, Yes, they have more money. But that was not humorous to Julian. He thought they were a special glamourous race and when he found they weren't it wrecked him just as

much as any other thing that wrecked him. He had been contemptuous of those who wrecked. You did not have to like it because you understood it. He could beat anything, he thought, because no thing could hurt him if he did not care. All right. Now he would not care for death. One thing he had always dreaded was the pain. He could stand pain as well as any man, until it went on too long, and wore him out, but here he had something that had hurt frightfully and just when he had felt it breaking him, the pain had stopped. He remembered long ago when Williamson, the bombing officer, had been hit by a stick bomb some one in a German patrol had thrown as he was coming in through the wire that night and, screaming, had begged every one to kill him. He was a fat man, very brave, and a good officer, although addicted to fantastic shows. But that night he was caught in JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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the wire, with a flare lighting him up and his bowels spilled out into the wire, so when they brought him in, alive, they had to cut him loose. Shoot me, Harry. For Christ sake shoot me. They had had an argument one time about our Lord never sending you anything you could not bear and some one's theory had been that meant that at a certain time the pain passed you out automatically. But he had always remembered Williamson, that night. Nothing passed out Williamson until he gave him all his morphine tablets that he had always saved to use himself and then they did not work right away. Still this now, that he had, was very easy; and if it was no worse as it went on there was nothing to worry about. Except that he would rather be in better company.

long, and do too late, you can't expect to find the people still there. The people all are gone. The party's over and you are with your hostess now. I'm getting as bored with dying as with everything else, he thought. "It's a bore," he said out loud. "What is, my dear?" "Anything you do too bloody long." He looked at her face between him and the fire. She was leaning back in the chair and the firelight shone on her pleasantly lined face and he could see that she was sleepy. He heard the hyena make a noise just outside the range of the fire. "I've been writing," he said. "But I got tired."

He thought a little about the company that he would like to have.

"Do you think you will be able to sleep?"

No, he thought, when everything you do, you do too

"Pretty sure. Why don't you turn in?" JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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"I like to sit here with you." "Do you feel anything strange?" he asked her. "No. Just a little sleepy." "I do," he said. He had just felt death come by again. "You know the only thing I've never lost is curiosity," he said to her. "You've never lost anything. You're the most complete man I've ever known." "Christ," he said. "How little a woman knows. What is that? Your intuition?" Because, just then, death had come and rested its head on the foot of the cot and he could smell its breath. "Never believe any of that about a scythe and a skull," he told her. "It can be two bicycle policemen as easily, or be a bird. Or it can have a wide snout like a hyena."

It had moved up on him now, but it had no shape any more. It simply occupied space. "Tell it to go away." It did not go away but moved a little closer. "You've got a hell of a breath," he told it. "You stinking bastard." It moved up closer to him still and now he could not speak to it, and when it saw he could not speak it came a little closer, and now he tried to send it away without speaking, but it moved in on him so its weight was all upon his chest, and while it crouched there and he could not move or speak, he heard the woman say, "Bwana is asleep now. Take the cot up very gently and carry it into the tent." He could not speak to tell her to make it go away and it crouched now, heavier, so he could not breathe. And then, while they lifted the cot, JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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suddenly it was all right and the weight went from his chest. It was morning and had been morning for some time and he heard the plane. It showed very tiny and then made a wide circle and the boys ran out and lit the fires, using kerosene, and piled on grass so there were two big smudges at each end of the level place and the morning breeze blew them toward the camp and the plane circled twice more, low this time, and then glided down and levelled off and landed smoothly and, coming walking toward him, was old Compton in slacks, a tweed jacket and a brown felt hat. "What's the matter, old cock?" Compton said. "Bad leg," he told him. "Will you have some breakfast?" "Thanks. I'll just have some tea. It's the Puss Moth you know. I won't be able to take the Memsahib. There's only room for one. Your lorry is on the way."

Helen had taken Compton aside and was speaking to him. Compton came back more cheery than ever. "We'll get you right in," he said. "I'll be back for the Mem. Now I'm afraid I'll have to stop at Arusha to refuel. We'd better get going." "What about the tea?" "I don't really care about it, you know." The boys had picked up the cot and carried it around the green tents and down along the rock and out onto the plain and along past the smudges that were burning brightly now, the grass all consumed, and the wind fanning the fire, to the little plane. It was difficult getting him in, but once in he lay back in the leather seat, and the leg was stuck straight out to one side of the seat where Compton sat. Compton started the motor and got in. He waved to Helen and to the boys and, as the clatter moved into the old familiar roar, they swung JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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around with Compie watching for warthog holes and roared, bumping, along the stretch between the fires and with the last bump rose and he saw them all standing below, waving, and the camp beside the hill, flattening now, and the plain spreading, clumps of trees, and the bush flattening, while the game trails ran now smoothly to the dry waterholes, and there was a new water that he had never known of. The zebra, small rounded backs now, and the wildebeeste, bigheaded dots seeming to climb as they moved in long fingers across the plain, now scattering as the shadow came toward them, they were tiny now, and the movement had no gallop, and the plain as far as you could see, gray-yellow now and ahead old Compie's tweed back and the brown felt hat. Then they were over the first hills and the wildebeeste were trailing up them, and then they were over mountains with sudden depths of green-rising forest and the solid bamboo slopes, and then the heavy

forest again, sculptured into peaks and hollows until they crossed, and hills sloped down and then another plain, hot now, and purple brown, bumpy with heat and Compie looking back to see how he was riding. Then there were other mountains dark ahead. And then instead of going on to Arusha they turned left, he evidently figured that they had the gas, and looking down he saw a pink sifting cloud, moving over the ground, and in the air, like the first snow in at ii blizzard, that comes from nowhere, and he knew the locusts were coming, up from the South. Then they began to climb and they were going to the East it seemed, and then it darkened and they were in a storm, the rain so thick it seemed like flying through a waterfall, and then they were out and Compie turned his head and grinned and pointed and there, ahead, all he could see, as wide as all the world, great, high, and unbelievably white in the sun, was the JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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square top of Kilimanjaro. And then he knew that there was where he was going.

Then she said, "Harry, Harry!" Then her voice rising, "Harry! Please. Oh Harry!"

Just then the hyena stopped whimpering in the night and started to make a strange, human, almost crying sound. The woman heard it and, stirred uneasily. She did not wake. In her dream she was at the house on Long Island and it was the night before her daughter's debut. Somehow her father was there and he had been very rude. Then the noise the hyena made was so loud she woke and for a moment she did not know where she was and she was very afraid. Then she took the flashlight and shone it on the other cot that they had carried in after Harry had gone to sleep. She could see his bulk under the mosquito bar but somehow he had gotten his leg out and it hung down alongside the cot. The dressings had all come down and she could not look at it.

There was no answer and she could not hear him breathing.

"Molo," she called, "Molo! Molo!"

Outside the tent the hyena made the same strange noise that had awakened her. But she did not hear him for the beating of her heart.

A VISIT FROM ST. NICHOLAS BY CLEMENT CLARKE MOORE

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse; The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there; The children were nestled all snug in their beds; While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads; And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap, Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap, When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter. Away to the window I flew like a flash, Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash. The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow, Gave a lustre of midday to objects below, When what to my wondering eyes did appear, But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny rein-deer, With a little old driver so lively and quick, I knew in a moment he must be St. Nick. More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name: "Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now Prancer and Vixen! On, Comet! on, Cupid! on, Donner and Blitzen! To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall! Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!" As leaves that before the wild hurricane fly, When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky; So up to the housetop the coursers they flew With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas tooâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof The prancing and pawing of each little hoof. As I drew in my head, and was turning around, Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound. He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot, And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot; A bundle of toys he had flung on his back, JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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And he looked like a pedler just opening his pack. His eyes—how they twinkled! his dimples, how merry! His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry! His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow, And the beard on his chin was as white as the snow; The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth, And the smoke, it encircled his head like a wreath; He had a broad face and a little round belly That shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly. He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf, And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself; A wink of his eye and a twist of his head Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread; He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work, And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk, And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose; He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle, And away they all flew like the down of a thistle. But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight— “Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”

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Lipsticks came in form of liquids to be applied with a brush. The first push up tube lipsticks were made in the U. S. in 1930s and it was a big success.

HOW LIPSTICK WAS INVENTED

The evidence show that Mesopotamian women used some kind of color to shade their lips. The first modern lipstick was in market in 1884 in Paris. It was made of castor oil, beeswax and deer tallow and was packed in silk packs.

In 1930s the actresses in the silent films wore black lipsticks and made it popular. By 1940 the market was full of variety of lipsticks in shades as well as style. By the end of World War II lipsticks became a popular cosmetic among women. Few people are credited to be the inventor of the lipstick. One of them is Hazel Bishop, a chemist by profession who experimented her creations in her motherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s kitchen in 1940s and finally landed inventing a stick of lip color which stayed on lips and JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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did not come off on glasses and cigarettes. Another name which is credited to be the inventor of a lipstick is that of Abu al- Qasim al- Zahrawi, an Islamic scientist and physician.

The lipsticks used today are more hygienic, resistant and medically approved. They now contain aloe Vera, sunscreens, vitamin E and amino acids for long stay and shine. Statistics say that about 80% women use lipsticks and about 20% own 20 lipsticks each but one is advised to be careful about the contents and company of the lipsticks they use as some part of it goes into the body and some ingredients like lead etc are hazardous for health.

In today modern environment, we cannot envision a world where female population is not using lipsticks in public appearances. But such time existed, when lipsticks were either hard to make, forbidden to use, unfashionable, and in some extreme cases even made from traditional materials that were poisonous. We donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know who made first lipstick, because they appeared very early in our history, and have traveled through ages and civilizations with varying degrees of success and acceptance by general public. What we do known though, are some of the most important points in the lipsticks history that enabled it to become such

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ever-present fashion item today. Even though we can determine that popularity of lipsticks became truly worldwide during 1920s and 1930s, its history reached much farther in the past. First paint products that were used to decorate lips of fashionable male and female users were created around 5 thousand in Ancient Mesopotamia. There, females used crushed gemstones to decorate their faces, but similar traditions soon reached Indus Valley Civilization and Egypt. While Indus Valley practiced creation of paints that were poisonous and in some cases deadly, Egypt chemist worked on much more useable formulas that remained in use all untill end of the Egyptian empire. Modern historian remembered the fact that famous Cleopatra often weared red lipstick that was made from crushed red carmine beetles. For more than thousand years after the fall of Egypt, European population almost

forgot about lipstick. They did not practice it in any occasion, and Christian Church popularized belief that red lipstick is the sign of the Satan worshiping. With such bad environment, lipsticks managed to resurface only in 16th century on the court of English Queen Elizabeth I. Her fashion of stark white faces and bright red lips popularized lipstick across entire England, but only for a small period of time. After this fashion trend passed, lipstick became marginalized and left to be used only by professional actors and the lowest classes of people (such as prostitutes). Changes of fashion regarding lipstick finally came at the end of 19th century. By then lipsticks finally started being produced in commercial use, packaged in metal tubes, and finally receiving their famous swivel-up mechanism in 1923. This enabled lipstick to become cheap, and easy to use, which quickly brought it to the booming film industry. With JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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the promotions from famous movie actresses in 1930s and 1950s (Sarah Bernhardt, Marilyn Monroe and Elizabeth Taylor), lipsticks soon became present on all four corners of the world. Even though we cannot determine what point in lipstick history is the most important one, all of those events contributed in the rise of this extremely popular fashion item that is today a part of our lives.

THE CREATION AND INVENTION OF THE COMPUTER BY CHARLES BABBAGE

We could argue that the first computer was the abacus or its descendant, the slide rule, invented by William Oughtred in 1622. But the first computer resembling today's modern machines was the Analytical Engine, a device conceived and designed by British mathematician Charles Babbage between 1833 and 1871. Before Babbage came along, a "computer" was a person, someone who literally sat around all day, adding and subtracting numbers and entering the results into tables. The tables then appeared in books, so other people could use them to complete tasks, such as launching artillery

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shells accurately or calculating taxes.

Oldest known computer

It was, in fact, a mammoth number-crunching project that inspired Babbage in the first place [source: CampbellKelly]. Napoleon Bonaparte initiated the project in 1790, when he ordered a switch from

the old imperial system of measurements to the new metric system. For 10 years, scores of human computers made the necessary conversions and completed the tables. Bonaparte was never able to publish the tables, however, and they sat collecting dust in the AcadĂŠmie des sciences in Paris. In 1819, Babbage visited the City of Light and viewed the unpublished manuscript with page after page of tables. If only, he wondered, there was a way to produce such tables faster, with less manpower and fewer mistakes. He thought of the many marvels generated by the Industrial Revolution. If creative and hardworking inventors could develop the cotton gin and the steam locomotive, then why not a machine to make calculations [source: Campbell-Kelly]? Babbage returned to England and decided to build just such a machine. His first vision was something he dubbed JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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the Difference Engine, which worked on the principle of finite differences, or making complex mathematical calculations by repeated addition without using multiplication or division. He secured government funding in 1824 and spent eight years perfecting his idea. In 1832, he produced a functioning prototype of his table-making machine, only to find his funding had run out. But, as you might have guessed, the story doesn't end there.

A computer is a generalpurpose device that can be programmed to carry out a set of arithmetic or logical operati ons automatically. Since a sequence of operations can be readily changed, the computer can solve more than one kind of problem.

Conventionally, a computer consists of at least one processing element, typically a central processing unit (CPU), and some form of memory. The processing element carries out arithmetic and logic operations, and a sequencing and control unit can change the order of operations in response to stored information. devices allow information to be retrieved from an external source, and the result of operations saved and retrieved. Mechanical analog computers started appearing in the first century and were later used in the medieval era for astronomical calculations. In World War II, mechanical analog computers were used for specialized military applications such as calculating torpedo aiming. During this time the first electronic digital computers were developed. Originally they were the size of a large room, consuming as much power as several hundred JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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modern personal computers (PCs). Modern computers based on integrated circuits are millions to billions of times more capable than the early machines, and occupy a fraction of the space. Computers are small enough to fit into mobile devices, and mobile computers can be powered by small batteries. Personal computers in their various forms are icons of the Information Age and are generally considered as "computers". However, the embedded computers found in many devices from MP3 players to fighter aircraftand from electronic toys to industrial robots are the most numerous.

haue read the truest computer of Times, and the best Arithmetician that euer breathed, and he reduceth thy dayes into a short number." It referred to a person who carried out calculations, or computations. The word continued with the same meaning until the middle of the 20th century. From the end of the 19th century the word began to take on its more familiar meaning, a machine that carries out computations.

HOW SHOES WERE INVENTED

The first known use of the word "computer" was in 1613 in a book called The Yong Mans Gleanings by English writer Richard Braithwait: "I JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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A shoe is an item of footwear intended to protect and comfort the human foot while doing various activities. Shoes are also used as an item of decoration. The design of shoes has varied enormously through time and from culture to culture, with appearance originally being tied to function. Additionally, fashion has often dictated many design elements, such as whether shoes have very high heels or flat ones. Contemporary footwear varies widely in style, complexity and cost. Basic sandals may consist of only a thin sole and simple strap. High fashion shoes may be made of very expensive materials in complex construction and sell for thousands of dollars a pair. Other shoes are for very specific purposes, such as boots designed specifically for mountaineering or skiing. Traditionally, shoes have been made from leather, wood or canvas, but are increasingly made from rubber, plastics, and

other petrochemical-derived materials. The foot contains more bones than any other single part of the body. Though it has evolved over hundreds of thousands of years in relation to vastly varied terrain and climate conditions, the foot is still vulnerable to environmental hazards such as sharp rocks and hot ground, against which, shoes can protect.

The earliest known shoes are sandals dating from approximately 7,000 or 8,000 BCE, found in the Fort Rock Cave in the US state of Oregon. in 1938. The world's oldest leather shoe, made from a single piece of cowhide laced with a leather cord along seams at the front and back, was found in the Areni-1 cave complex in Armenia in 2008 JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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and is believed to date to 3,500 B.C. Ă&#x2013;tzi the Iceman's shoes, dating to 3,300 BC, featured brown bearskin bases, deerskin side panels, and a bark-string net, which pulled tight around the foot. TheJotunheimen shoe was discovered in August 2006. Archaeologists estimate that the leather shoe was made between 1800 and 1100 BCE, making it the oldest article of clothing discovered in Scandinavia.

However, it is estimated that shoes may have been used long before this, but it is difficult to find evidence of the earliest footwear due to the highly perishable nature of early shoes.By studying the bones of the smaller toes (as opposed to

the big toe), it was observed that their thickness decreased approximately 40,000 to 26,000 years ago. This led archaeologists to deduce that wearing shoes resulted in less bone growth, resulting in shorter, thinner toes. These earliest designs were very simple in design, often mere "foot bags" of leather to protect the feet from rocks, debris, and cold. They were more commonly found in colder climates. Many early natives in North America wore a similar type of footwear, known as the moccasin. These are tightfitting, soft-soled shoes typically made out of leather Orbison hides. Many moccasins were also decorated with various beads and other adornments. Moccasins were not designed to be waterproof, and in wet weather and warm summer months, most Native Americans went barefoot. As civilizations began to develop, thong sandals (the precursors of the modern flipJOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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flop) were worn. This practice dates back to pictures of them in ancient Egyptian murals from 4,000 B.C. One pair found in Europe was made of papyrus leaves and dated to be approximately 1,500 years old. They were also worn in Jerusalem during the time of Jesus Christ. Thong sandals were worn by many civilizations and made from a wide variety of materials. Ancient Egyptian sandals were made from papyrus and palm leaves. The Masaiof Africa made them out of rawhide. In India they were made from wood. In China and Japan, rice straw was used. The leaves of the sisal plant were used to make twine for sandals in South America while the natives of Mexico used the Yucca plant.

The 5,500 year old shoe was found well preserved under a heap of sheep excrement in an Armenian cave. This does not make it the oldest ever foot ware

While thong sandals were commonly worn, many people in ancient times, such as the Egyptians, Hindus and Gre eks, saw little need for footwear, and most of the time, preferred being barefoot. The Egyptians and Hindus made some use of ornamental footwear, such as a soleless sandal known as a "Cleopatra", which did not provide any practical protection for the JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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foot. The ancient Greeks largely viewed footwear as self-indulgent, unaesthetic and unnecessary. Shoes were primarily worn in the theater, as a means of increasing stature, and many preferred to go barefoot. Athletes in the Ancient Olympic Games participated barefoot â&#x20AC;&#x201C; and naked. Even the gods and heroes were primarily depicted barefoot, and the hoplite warriors fought battles in bare feet and Alexander the Great conquered his vast empire with barefoot armies. The runners of Ancient Greece are also believed to have run barefoot. Pheidippides, the first marathoner, ran from Athens to Sparta in less than 36 hours. After the Battle of Marathon, he ran straight from the battlefield to Athens to inform the Athenians of the news. The Romans, who eventually conquered the Greeks and adopted many aspects of their culture, did not adopt the

Greek perception of footwear and clothing. Roman clothing was seen as a sign of power, and footwear was seen as a necessity of living in a civilized world, although the slaves and paupers usually went barefoot. Roman soldiers were issued with chiralfootwear. There are many references to shoes being worn in the Bible. During weddings of this period, a father would give his son-inlaw a pair of shoes, to symbolize the transfer of authority. Slaves were also commonly barefoot, and shoes were considered badges of freedom since biblical times:

Humans started wearing shoes about 40,000 years ago, much earlier than previously thought, new anthropological research suggests.

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As any good clothes horse knows, the right outfit speaks volumes about the person wearing it. Now, anthropologists are tapping into that knowledge base, looking for the physical changes caused by wearing shoes to figure out when footwear first became fashionable. Turns out, clothes really do make the man (and the woman), at least when it comes to feet. That's because wearing shoes changes the way humans walk and how their bodies distribute weight. If you wear shoes regularly, as most modern humans do, those changes end up reflected in your bones and ligaments. Susan Cachel, an anthropologist at Rutgers University in New Jersey, said science has known about the way wearing shoes affects feet since the early 20th century. Researchers have found several differences between feet that regularly wear shoes and those that don't.

For instance, wearing tight shoes can lead to bunions, which are painful enlargements of the bone or tissue in the big toe, she said. People who don't wear shoes have wider feet and bigger gaps between their big toe and the other four. And women who spend a lot of time in high heels wind up with smaller calf muscles. Erik Trinkaus, an anthropologist at Washington University in St. Louis, was the first person to apply this understanding of how fashion alters physical bodies to anthropology. He found a point in human history where the size of toe bones began to shrink. Combining that data with knowledge of how shoes change the way people walk, Trinkaus reasoned that smaller toe bones meant people had started wearing shoes. While the oldest surviving shoes are only about 10,000 years old, Trinkaus' discovery pushed the adoption of footwear back to almost 30,000 JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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years ago. He published that research in 2005. Now, thanks to analysis set to be published in the July 2008 issue of the Journal of Archaeological Science, Trinkaus has found that humans were probably wearing shoes even earlier, about 40,000 years ago. Through thick and thin Trinkaus' theory is based on a simple fact: Bone size isn't set in stone. "Bone, at least to a certain extent, responds during a person's lifetime to the mechanical stresses placed on it," said Tim Weaver, a University of California, Davis, anthropologist. "If you work out at the gym, not only will your muscles get bigger, your bones will become thicker." For most of their history, humans had big, thick toe bones. Trinkaus said this was because they were doing more walking, climbing and carrying than we do today. In fact, he said, all their leg bones were

bigger as well, for the same reasons. This is true for both Neanderthals and the earliest modern humans. But, around 40,000 years ago, that began to change. Trinkaus noticed that skeletons from this time period still had strong, thick leg bones, but their toes had suddenly gotten smaller. "They had wimpy toes," he said. "I tried to figure out what would take away stresses on the toes, but not the legs, and the answer was shoes." First shoes, first tailors While Weaver agrees with Trinkaus' theory, Cachel doesn't buy it. She pointed out that, not long after the time period Trinkaus looked at, humans apparently stopped being so active and all their limb bones, not just the toes, started to shrink. "If the footbones are smaller, this probably reflects less walking and physical activity, rather than the invention of JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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supportive footware," Cachel said.

Trinkaus' study we didn't have any direct evidence."

Both Weaver and Cachel think that it would make sense for shoes to hit it big around the time Trinkaus thinks they did. Around 40,000 and 30,000 years ago, human culture went through a growth spurt.

ANCIENT HISTORY OF HIGH HEELED SHOES

"The archaeological record shows may changes, including the types of tools people were making and the first definite artwork, and the oldest needles for making clothing appear shortly afterward," Weaver said. And Cachel said this was probably the time period where a population boom allowed for the first divisions of labor, meaning that, for the the first time, somebody could dedicate all their time to making better, more decorated clothing. "It seems reasonable that there were changes in footwear around this time too," Weaver said, "But before Erik

“I don’t know who invented the high heel,” said Marilyn Monroe, “but women owe him a lot.”. ... The high heel wasn’t really invented, it evolved over time thanks to Venetian prostitutes, British queens and French designers. ... Women’s platform shoes, or chopines,

Women began to adopt high heels for many of the same reasons. One of the oldest pairs on display is a 16th century shoe called the chopine. JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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It has been commonly stated that the first instance of the wear of high heels involved the 1533 marriage between Catherine de' Medici with the Duke of

Orleans. She wore heels made in Florence for her wedding, and as a result, Italian high heels became the norm for ladies of the Duke's court in France. Unfortunately, this reference may be apocryphal, as the development of heels did not begin to come about until the late 1580s, based on iconographic evidence and extant pieces. Mary Tudor, another short monarch, wore heels as high as possible. From this period until the early 19th century, high heels were frequently in vogue for both sexes. Around 1660, a shoemaker named Nicholas Lestage designed high heeled shoes for Louis XIV. Some were more than four inches (ten cm), and most were decorated in various battle scenes. The resulting high "Louis heels" subsequently became fashionable for ladies. Today the term is used to refer to heels with a concave curve and outward taper at the bottom similar to those worn JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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by Madame de Pompadour,Louis XV's mistress. (They are also sometimes called "Pompadour heels".) Since the French Revolution (1789-1799) the trend wearing high heels was ended to avoid any associating with the old aristocracy and it's opulence. Since people wished to avoid the appearance of wealth, heels were largely eliminated from the common market for both men and women and replace by casual fashion and shoe wear. From the beginning of the Baroque the heel came back to shoes.

Woman's shoe with a Louis heel, 1760â&#x20AC;&#x201C;1765

Although high-heeled shoes or boots have more often been worn by women, in various times and places they have been standard features of men's footwear too, either for practical reasons or as fashionable items. Mongolian horsemen were among the first to use heels as means to keep their feet from sliding out of their stirrups. It is also well known that Egyptian butchers wore high heels so they would not step directly in offal Pharaohs and nobles in Ancient Egypt would wear high heels to show power and for ceremonial purposes. Actors playing tragic roles in ancient Greek drama wore the buskin, a boot with a platform sole, designed to give them greater height over other actors. The Romans, both men and women, wore cothurns, or sandals with platform heels; these were intended to lift the wearers above mud and garbage in the streets. Geta, which are based on a similar JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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concept, are still used in Japan today. American cowboy boots, first developed in the 19th century and still popular today in some parts of the United States, have high underslung heels to keep a rider's foot from sliding through the stirrup. High-heeled platform shoes were a widely popular form of men's footwear during the 1970s.

HOW TO MAKE YOUR OWN SHOES (source;shoes of prey)

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the bottom of the shoe); the insole (the internal part of the shoe that sits directly under the foot); the outsole (the outer layer that directly touches the ground) and the heel.

Step 1: Cutting the pattern Almost every pair of shoes we make at Shoes of Prey is unique and so requires a unique pattern to be cut. Pattern cutting involves creating the shape of each component of the shoe. With all our possible shoe combinations and each shoe size requiring a new pattern, we have a lot of patterns in our studio! In the video above you can see an upper pattern being created. An upper is the part of the shoe that sits on top of the foot. The other parts of the shoe that need to have patterns made include; the sole (the core of

Step 2: Tools of the trade One of the most important tools for making a shoe is the last, something which customers never normally get to see! The last is a foot shaped piece of material over which the shoes are molded. A different last is used for each shoe size and style. For example, a shoe with a pointy toe will be molded using a last with a pointy toe. The last is so important because it determines the fit and feel of the shoes. Step 3: Edging Edging is the process of flattening the edge of the pieces of leather that have been cut to the pattern so it is thinner than the rest of the leather piece. This makes for crisp, neat joins between pieces of leather giving you a much JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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more comfortable fit as well as the quality finish you would expect from a pair of hand crafted shoes.

that sits against your foot) and the outersole (the piece that sits against the ground). Step 9: Shoes of Prey Logo

Step 4: Stitching The different parts of the shoe are then carefully stitched together.

The Shoes of Prey logo is lovingly added to your shoes.

Step 5: Trimming preparation The next step is to prepare the trimming before it is added to the shoes. Step 6: Selecting the heel What size heel would you like? Our stiletto heels come in different shapes and sizes, and you get to pick! These become the core of the heel of your shoe - encased in the leather you have chosen. Step 7: Trimming the excess This involves carefully putting together and making the finishing touches to the decorative upper for another pair of hand made shoes.

Step 10: Affixing the outersole The outersole is the affixed to the shoe. Step 11: Finishing The final cutting, cleaning and polishing of the shoes. The shoes are then boxed and shipped straight to your waiting feet!

Step 8: Preparing the sole The core pieces of the sole of the shoe are then covered either side by the insole (the piece JOY FEELINGS | DECEMBER ISSUE

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